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LIFE AND DIARY 

or THE 

REV. JOHN HENRY GARDNER. 



K .DIN BURGH '. PRINTED BY M. AITKEN, 1, ST STAMES'S St»UARJE. 



P. 11. 1807_DIBD APKCj 1C . 18 2 3 . 



ENGRAVED £"? 3*1 JOHNiTONE IE.T1 1 A MINIATURE ET ldKJILLESPIE 



LIFE AND DIARY 



REV. JOHN HENRY GARDNER, 

m 

WHITHORN. 



DONALD FRASER, D.D. 

KENNOWAY, 

AUTHOR OF THE LIFE AND DIARY OF THE REV. EBENEZER AND 
THE REV. RALPH ERSKINE, &c. 



EDINBURGH : 
PUBLISHED BY M. PATERSON, 12, UNION PLACE; 
HAMILTON, ADAMS, AND CO., LONDON ; AND W. CURRY, JUN. 
AND CO., DUBLIN. 

1836. 



4 



TO THE 

UNITED ASSOCIATE CONGREGATION 

OF WHITHORN, 
THIS MEMORIAL OF AN AMIABLE PASTOR, 

OF WHOSE SHORT BUT INTERESTING 
CAREER THEY RETAIN AN AFFECTIONATE 
REMEMBRANCE, 
IS BESPECTFULLY INSCRIBED. 



PREFACE. 



In selecting the subjects, as well as regulating the 
details of Christian Biography, a prudent discrimina- 
tion is justly expected. Whilst undue prominence, 
however, is sometimes injudiciously allotted to cha- 
racters comparatively very ordinary and uninteresting, 
departed individuals whose real and acknowledged 
worth seems calculated to render their memorials 
signally, or somewhat considerably, subservient to 
the advancement of piety, ought not to be utterly 
neglected. 

The ministers of the Secession Church have not 
been altogether overlooked in the biographical wri- 
tings of the present age. A favourable reception has 
been given to memorials, not only of the founders of 
that numerous body, the Wilsons and the Erskines, 
but also to their excellent successors, as the Browns 
and the Waughs. Nor is it merely those pious ser- 
vants of Christ that have been spared to accomplish 
a lengthened course of honourable and useful service 
in the Church on earth, whose claims to this notice 
are cheerfully recognised. The remains of hopeful 
pastors whose " sun has gone down at noon," and 
whose piety and talents had just begun to diffuse a 



Viii PREFACE. 

delightful fragrance, when, in the inscrutable provi- 
dence of God, they were cut down like the tender 
flower by the vehement blast, have been perused by 
many with peculiar pleasure and advantage. If the 
memory of an Alexander Waugh, Jun., a James 
Gray, an Alexander Marshall, a Robert Brown, 
an Alexander Fisher, a William Lourie, an 
Alexander Nisbet, and some other young ministers 
deceased, of whom more or less ample accounts have 
appeared, be dear to the United Secession Church, 
none who knew the lovely youth will deem it pre- 
sumptuous to add to this list the name of John 
Henry Gardner. 

The writer of the following pages possesses, in one 
respect, advantages decidedly superior to those that fell 
to the share of most of his brethren, the biographers 
of the worthy young clergymen just referred to. He 
alludes to facilities for describing his nephew's cha- 
racter, and narrating his history, mental as well as 
external, furnished by a collection of materials un- 
commonly extensive. Not merely from a great num- 
ber of letters addressed to relatives and other corre- 
spondents, but from a copious Diary written by him- 
self in short-hand characters, of the existence of which 
he was totally ignorant till after his lamented decease, 
he has been enabled to state many interesting parti- 
culars regarding him which otherwise could not have 



PREFACE. 



IX 



been learned. The numerous extracts from his Diary, 
the design and occasion of which are adverted to in 
pages twentieth and twenty-first, will be found pecu- 
liarly valuable. 

To tell the truth, it was originally intended that 
this volume should consist partly of a memoir, and 
partly of a few lectures and sermons selected from a 
large store of excellent discourses found among his 
manuscripts. Several esteemed friends, however, 
who had favourable opportunities for examining the 
matter, ultimately adopted the opinion, that since a 
volume of the size and price contemplated was neces- 
sary for the Life and Diary alone, it would be proper, 
meantime at least, to suffer all the other fruits of his 
pen, how well-written and instructive soever, to re- 
main asleep in their repository, that justice might be 
done to the simple exhibition of his sentiments, and 
the warm effusions of his heart, which his epistolary 
communications, and in particular the memoranda of 
his journal, supply. The latter, at any rate, will be 
regarded by the Christian public as a greater rarity 
than the former; and possibly not a few may see 
cause, on perusing it, to consider his Diary capable 
of standing a comparison, in respect at once to ex- 
pression and to deep-toned evangelical piety, with 
the greater proportion of the writings of the same 
description that have secured the most marked esteem 
among the friends of vital religion. 



X 



PREFACE. 



How gratifying soever this publication may be to 
the feelings of surviving relatives in one view, it 
serves to try them not a little in another ■ and they 
greatly deceive themselves if it is not their principal 
aim to promote the cause of the Redeemer, and to 
employ a likely means which Divine Providence has 
put within their reach, and for which they are respon- 
sible, of prolonging in some measure the usefulness of 
a promising youth, whose ministerial career proved 
(such was the will of Heaven !) exceedingly short. 

To the teacher of children, the student in divinity, 
the new licentiate, and the young minister of the gospel, 
this little work, it is humbly expected, from the pattern 
it exhibits, and the practical hints it suggests, will be 
particularly useful. In memoirs of clergymen the space 
that intervenes betwixt their receiving license to preach 
the gospel and their ordination to the ministry, is 
usually regarded as almost entirely void of interest, 
and consequently passed over in a very cursory man- 
ner. A different method, however, has been adopted 
with respect to the minister who forms the subject of 
these sheets. Owing to the combined operation of 
the sufficient time that he remained a probationer^ 
the great variety of towns and districts where he was 
appointed to officiate, his zeal and activity in improv- 
ing the diversified opportunities of doing good that 
presented themselves in the places where he sojourn- 



PREFACE. 



xi 



ed, and the accuracy with which he recorded the 
more memorable circumstances that occurred, the f 
transactions of this period of his life will be found 
highly pleasing and instructive. 

Private Christians, it is hoped, will experience this 
ff. Life and Diary" to be conducive to their spiritual 
benefit. To the members of his own congregation 
who were 6e willing for a season to rejoice in his 
light/' — to all that knew him, or had occasionally 
enjoyed his ministrations — to not a few who never 
heard his voice or saw his face in the flesh- — and, in 
particular, to ingenuous youths, whatever be the oc- 
cupations they respectively pursue, it seems calcula- 
ted, by conciuring influence from above, to administer 
seasonable instruction, excitement, and encourage- 
ment. It will serve not only to gratify the curiosity, 
but also to promote the edification of the reader, to 
see the notices it comprises of many individuals partly 
connected with the United Secession Church, as the 
late Mr Brown of Whitburn, and Dr Dick of Glas- 
gow ; and partly belonging to other denominations, 
as the late Mr Rowatt of Whithorn. The informa- 
tion it communicates respecting both Mr Gardner's 
own feelings and conduct, and the temper and beha- 
viour of other young men with whom he associated, 
is well fitted to confirm the conviction that there is a 
reality in religion ; that godly and faithful labourers 



xii 



PREFACE. 



are still sent forth into the vineyard by its sovereign 
and gracious Lord ; and that " a seed shall serve 
him" from age to age, till the last trumpet shall sound 
to summon the quick and the dead to the tribunal of 
judgment. A large proportion of the details imme- 
diately bearing on religious experience are by no 
means adapted exclusively to persons invested with a 
public character, but come home to " the business 
and bosom" of every lover of the Saviour, and furnish 
a variety of important remarks relative to Christian 
principle and practice. 

It is scarcely necessary to add, that, conformably 
to the prevailing temper of its subject, the author has 
written this narrative in a conciliatory spirit, and that 
the various extracts it contains exhibit nothing which 
can justly prove repulsive to Christian ministers or 
people of any denomination. 

Is the question, after all, asked, Why should the ac- 
count of a minister, whose mortal course was so cir- 
cumscribed, and who comparatively attracted so little 
attention in the church or the world, be so minute and so 
extended ? The compiler can merely reply, that upon 
examining the numerous materials laid to his hand, 
they appeared to him so valuable, that he could not, 
consistently with duty, have abridged them to a much 
greater extent. In adjusting the detail, he has been 
governed by a regard to the moral and spiritual ten- 



PREFACE. 



xiii 



dency of the occurrences and expressions introduced. 
If in any instance he has given place to insignificant 
particulars to a degree exceeding what was requisite 
to render the more important materials intelligible 
and impressive, he has only to solicit the candid in- 
dulgence of his readers, which he trusts will not he 
withheld. He is quite aware that his near relation 
to John Henry Gardner, and the fatherly affection 
with which he always regarded him, while they have 
supplied certain facilities in composing this account, 
have also carried along with them some disadvantages, 
for which the considerate and benevolent will be dis- 
posed to make allowance. 

It is no small happiness, in his estimation, that the 
book consists, in a much greater proportion, of extracts 
from others, and especially from the journal and the 
letters of his nephew, than of paragraphs written by 
himself. His province has demanded little else than 
to select and arrange ; and he can positively assure 
Iris readers, that being familiarly acquainted with the 
mode of stenography practised by his lamented rela- 
tive, he has here maintained the same strict fidelity 
in quotation exemplified in his former attempts in 
biography. The memoranda of the Diary, though 
often hastily written, are characterised by great gene- 
ral correctness ; and he has almost invariably judged 
it better to leave every sentence to appear exactly as 

b 



XIV 



PREFACE. 



it was originally written, though the selection or col- 
location of the words might occasionally admit of a 
slight improvement, than to hazard the least altera- 
tion. Wherever terms or sentences are omitted, care 
is taken to prevent the sense and tenor of the record 
from undergoing any change. 

That the traces of human imperfection, which are 
no douht discernible in this publication, may not 
materially impair its utility ; and that, by the blessing 
of God, it may conduce in some measure to the high 
object, which he believes to be sincerely desired by 
individuals still more nearly related than the com- 
piler to the excellent youth whose memory it em- 
balms, is the earnest wish of 

D. F. 

Kenncway, April 1836. 



CONTENTS. 



PERIOD I. 

FROM HIS BIRTH TO HIS ENTRANCE ON THE STUDY OF 
DIVINITY. 

P: 

Birth — Parentage — Removal from Ireland to Scotland, at 
an early age, after his Father's death — Elementary Educa- . 
tioD— .Attendance at the University of Edinburgh — Classical 
Attainments — Bodily Ailments — Death of his sister Magda- 
lene — Early Piety — First Approach to the Lord's Table — 
Self-dedication — Examination at Lanark, and Admission to 
the Divinity Hall, . 

PERIOD II. 

FROM HIS ENTRANCE ON THE STUDY OF DIVINITY TO 
THE CLOSE OF HIS CURRICULUM OF FIVE SESSIONS. 

Happiness as a Teacher at Foldhouse, Whitburn — Kind- 
ness of Rev. Mr Brown and other friends — Diary — Deep 
Convictions, but happy relief—Delight in Prayer, — in read- 
ing the Scriptures and a variety of religious books, — in hear- 
ing the Gospel, — in attending the Lord's Supper at Whit- 
burn and other places, — in Pious Conference — Praying So- 
cieties — Strict Self-Inquiry — Reflections on his Birth-Day 
—Notice of the Death of Ministers and Others — Zeal for the 
Spiritual Welfare of his Scholars and other Young People — 
Activity in countenancing Sabbath Schools — Attention to 



xvi 



CONTENTS. 



Page 

the Sick, and to Mendicants — Successful Prosecution of 
Theological Studies at Glasgow, and under the superin- 
tendence of the Presbytery of Lanark — Serious Inquiry whe- 
ther or not he should become a Missionary to the Heathen ? 
— Promotes a Missionary Spirit among his Fellow-Students 
» — Cultivates Acquaintance with Missionaries — Removes to 
Edinburgh to Study Natural Philosophy— Avails himself 
of various means of Literary and Religious Improvement — 
Christian Benevolence, . . . . . .17 



PERIOD III. 

FROM HIS RECEIVING LICENSE TO PREACH THE GOSPEL, 
TILL THE TIME OF HIS RESOLVING TO ACCEPT THE CALL 
TO WHITHORN. 

Licensed by the Presbytery of Cupar — Views and feelings 
— Persevering self-inquiry — Preaches the Gospel in a num- 
ber of places, including Liverpool, Banff, Inverary, Orkney 
Islands — Visits the sick, and adopts various means of doing 
good — Profits by affliction, by the death of ministers and 
friends, by useful conversation and advice, by natural scenery 
— Spots particularly interesting to him, as Cornhill, Dun- 
fermline, Inverness, and Newtonards, Ireland — Esteem he 
acquired — Acquiescence in disappointments — Thoughts of 
a Mission to Jamaica — Attending Medical Classes in Octo- 
ber 1830-1 — Called to Whithorn, and resolves to accept 
the call, . . . . .116 

PERIOD IV. 

FROM HIS SETTLEMENT AT WHITHORN TILL HIS DEATH. 



Whithorn — Circumstances of ordination — Solemn im- 



CONTENTS. 



xvii 



pressions— Plan of study—Rules of conduct— Subjects of 
discourse—Election of elders — Attention to discipline — Ad- 
ministration of Baptism and the Lord's Supper — Notes for 
family visitation — Attention to the young, to the Bible and 
Missionary cause, to the business of the Presbytery— No- 
tice of the deceased, including his predecessor the Rev. 
John Smith, Rev. John Brown, Whitburn, Rev. Gavin 
Rowatt, Whithorn, Dr Dick, Glasgow — Serious illness, ex- 
cursion, recovery, and return to Whithorn — Renewal of 
trouble — Reflections — Restored health — Sudden and severe 
affliction— Death and burial — Inscription on tomb — Sincerely 
regretted by his congregation and others — Letters of condo- 
lence—Summary of his character — Affection for relatives- 
Bodily appearance— Sources of consolation — Writings, 178 



LIFE AND DIARY 

or THE 

REV. JOHN HENRY GARDNER. 



PERIOD I. 

FROM HIS BIRTH TO HIS ENTRANCE ON THE STUDY OF 
DIVINITY. 

John Henry Gardner was born at Newtonards, 
county of Down, Ireland., on Friday the 11th Septem- 
ber 1807- His parents, the Rev. James Gardner and 
Magdalene Fraser, were both natives of Scotland. 
His father was born at Halcraig, Airdrie, Nov. 17, 
1774, being the only surviving son of John Gardner, 
builder, who died towards the close of the year 1807, 
and Mary Allan, who followed her husband to the 
grave February 20, 1829, at the very advanced age 
of more than ninety years. Mary discovered a pious 
disposition, combined with considerable powers of 
judgment and memory. We never saw a female 
more minutely acquainted with the early history of 
the Secession Church, of which she and her husband 
were members, or more capable of relating, with accu- 
racy and spirit, instructive and entertaining anecdotes 
regarding its ministers. 



2 



LIFE AND DIARY OF THE 



Their son James having studied languages and 
philosophy at the University of Glasgow, and theology 
under the tuition of the late learned and Rev. 
Archibald Bruce of Whitburn, Professor to the 
General Associate Synod, was licensed to preach the 
gospel ; and after creditably serving the Church for 
a few years in the capacity of a licentiate, accepted a 
call from a congregation at Newtonards, under the 
inspection of the sister synod in Ireland, where he 
was ordained about the end of October 1801. On 
Monday, the 26th April 1802, he married Magda- 
lene, the third daughter of the late Rev. John 
Fraser, Auchtermuchty, and Magdalene Erskine, 
grand-daughter of the Rev. Ralph Erskine, Dun- 
fermline. 

Mr Gardner endeared himself to his congregation 
alike by his public and private ministrations, and 
his character rose progressively in general estimation. 
Yet it pleased that God, whose ways are " past find- 
ing out," to visit him with a distemper, of which he 
died on the 21st January 1812, in the thirty-eighth 
year of his age, and the eleventh of his ministry. It 
will gratify the surviving relatives and acquaintance 
of this pious and amiable minister, to see the follow- 
ing brief notice of his death and character, supposed 
to have been written by one of his co-presbyters, 
which appeared in the Belfast News-Letter shortly 
after his decease : — 

" Died, on Tuesday the 21st of January, the Rev. 
James Gardner, minister of Newtonards, after an 
illness which he bore with exemplary patience. He 
was a sincere friend, an affectionate husband, and 



REV. JOHN HENRY GARDNER. 



s 



an indulgent father. As a preacher of the Gospel, 
he was lively, pathetic, impressive, and much esteemed 
by his own congregation, and by others. His bene- 
volent and kind offices to all his acquaintances of 
different denominations, were only limited by his abi- 
lities to do good. He has left a disconsolate widow, 
and three helpless children, to lament his premature 
death in the midst of his days." 

John Henry was the youngest of the bereaved 
family ; but though little more than four years and 
four months old when he sustained this heavy loss, 
he seems to have cherished through life a most affec- 
tionate veneration for the memory of his excellent 
father, and to have kept in perpetual remembrance 
some of the pious lessons he had taught him in his 
childhood. His private memoranda contain a variety 
of tender allusions to a departed parent, of which we 
present the following specimens : — 

ei May 22, 1825.— Mr Shaw of Whitburn preached 
in his own meeting-house for the Whitburn Sabbath 
School. His text was in the end of the Romans, 
i Who also were in Christ before me.' Mr S., in 
addressing parents, reminded them that their prayers 
might be answered to their children after they were 
in their graves. This affected me considerably, from 
the circumstance that it was one of the last things 
my dear father said to me, ' Pray for your father ; 
your father prays for you/ God of my father, pour 
thy Spirit on his seed, and thy blessing on his off- 
spring. 

" Jan. 21, 1826. — It is fourteen years this day 
since my dear sisters and myself became fatherless, 



LIFE AND DIARY OF THE 



and our mother a widow. As for our dearest earthly 
friend, who was then removed from our sight, we 
have good reason to hope that all is well with him • 
and as for those of ourselves who still remain in the 
vale of tears, we have a better, an everlasting friend, 
into whose benevolent bosom we can pour our bitterest 
complaints, and on whose arm we can depend for sup- 
port and protection in the hour of weakness, and the 
season of danger." 

Having lost her beloved husband, as well as two 
dear boys, John and James, being the eldest and the 
youngest of her family, whose remains were com- 
mitted to the dust before him, it now belonged to 
Mrs Gardner to come to a decision respecting the 
place of her future residence. Her continuance at 
Newtonards would have highly gratified the feelings 
of many warm friends in her husband's congregation, 
and of other denominations in that vicinity, who 
kindly proposed schemes by which she might have, 
at the same time, provided for her family and pro- 
moted the public good. Attachment to her native 
country, however, and the pressing invitations of her 
relatives — in particular the affectionate entreaties of 
her father, who most tenderly sympathized with his 
daughter and grandchildren under their great be- 
reavement — induced her respectfully to decline the 
benevolent proposals of Irish wellwishers, and to bid 
them a solemn and affectionate adieu. About three 
months after Mr Gardner's death, she returned to 
Scotland, and, after some interval, took up house at 
Auchtermuchty, where she met with much counte- 



REV. JOHN HENRY GARDNER. 



nance and encouragement from a considerable circle 
of early and attached friends, while she enjoyed the 
presence and assistance of her father, till it pleased 
God, in December 1818, to remove him to eternity. 

The right education of her children was a matter 
she had deeply at heart. Her son s aptitude for learn- 
ing, and the religious impressions he early discovered, 
led her, in particular, to make eveiy exertion for his 
instruction in the first principles of literature as well 
as Christianity. Having gone to the parochial school 
in spring 1813, he continued to attend it for about 
seven years, during the first six of which it was 
taught by Mr William Gay, and the last by Mi- 
Archibald Dickson, now a licentiate in the Church 
of Scotland. Encouraged by his capacity and dili- 
gence, both these teachers treated him with marked 
attention ; and under their tuition he made consider- 
able proficiency, not only in the English and Latin 
languages, but also in the Greek and the French. 
His own grandfather, while he remained alive, watch- 
ed his progress with delight ; and after his death, his 
education was very kindly superintended by the Rev. 
Archibald Baird of Paisley, pastor, at that period, of 
the First Congregation of the United Secession, Auch- 
termuchty. To this talented minister, he for some 
time, almost every morning, read lessons in Livy, 
Homer, and other ancient authors ; while, at least 
every Sabbath evening, he and his sisters received in- 
struction in the doctrines of the Bible. 

Shortly after he had finished the thirteenth year of 
his age, John Henry entered the University of Edin- 
burgh, where, during the session commencing No- 



6 



LIFE AND DIARY OF THE 



vember 1820, and the two following sessions, he 
studied Latin, Greek, and Hebrew, several branches 
of Mathematics, Logic, and Moral Philosophy. In 
the year 1822, he also for some time attended an 
Elocution class, which eventually proved of no small 
advantage to him as a public speaker. Various let- 
ters addressed to relatives, during the course of his 
academical studies, serve to manifest the zeal and 
assiduity with which he improved his opportunities 
of acquiring valuable knowledge. In a letter to his 
mother, for instance, he says : — " I do not think I 
told you that I got back my Essay from Dr Ritchie, 
with the following words at the end of it, ' This is an 
excellent Essay— the author has given a luminous 
view of his subject in clear and perspicuous language. 
D. R/ " Writing to an uncle, too, in February 1823, 
he makes the following statement : — f ' Mr Wilson is 
lecturing at present on the benevolent affections, 
which he makes two ; love and sympathy. Part of 
my Essay on Touch and Sight was read on Saturday. 
It was received much better than I expected. I am 
writing another on that part of our moral nature 
called the moral sense or conscience. At the Hebrew 
class we are reading the Psalms. We have already 
finished the 1st, 2d, 3d, 8th, and J 5th; and the 16th 
is the lesson for to-day." 

His extreme modesty, to say the truth, prevented 
him from making so conspicuous a figure at the Uni- 
versity as his talents might have enabled him to do ; 
and those who happened to be the most intimately 
acquainted with him, never failed to entertain the 
most favourable ideas of his scholarship. The testi- 



REV. JOHN HENRY GARDNER. 



7 



monials he received from two gentlemen that knew 
him well, on the occasion of his applying for a situa- 
tion as a teacher of youth, are much to his credit. 
Mr Baird, his esteemed minister mentioned above, 
hears testimony, in decided terms, to "his amiable 
dispositions, promising abilities, studious habits, pro- 
gress in different departments of study, and to the 
eminent prudence and piety he had long discovered." 

The following is an exact copy of the certificate 
granted him at the same time by Mr Dickson, his 
highly respectable teacher : — 

" Auchtermuchty, 21st February 1822. 
" I hereby certify that Mr John Henry Gard- 
ner has attended the parochial school of this place, 
as a pupil of mine, for the last two years, with the 
exception of last session's attendance at College, and 
that part of the present one which has already ex- 
pired. That, previous to his becoming a scholar of 
mine, he had read Latin for nearly five years and 
Greek upwards of one ; and that having had the ad- 
vantage of a good master, and being himself possess- 
ed of more than ordinary ability, and formed to 
studious habits, he had acquired a knowledge of these 
languages much beyond what is generally attained at 
a country school. During the time he was a scholar 
of mine, he read the whole of Horace and part of 
Cicero, together with Mair's Introduction, and the 
whole of the Collectanea Minora, part of Homer, to- 
gether with Professor Dunbar's Greek Exercises. 
Having turned his attention to Geography and 
French, he acquired such a knowledge of the latter as 



8 



LIFE AND DIARY OF THE 



to be able, at the time of bis leaving me, to translate 
that language, ad aperturum libri, with the greatest 
ease and accuracy. Latterly he went through a 
course of Mathematics and the elementary part of 
Algebra, in which his progress was fully equal to that 
which he had made in his other studies. 

" In one word, he is without exception one of the 
best scholars I have ever met with ; and I am sure 
that every one of the ministers who attended the 
annual examination of my school, would, if called 
upon, be happy to bear testimony to the intimate ac- 
quaintance which he displayed on these occasions, in 
regard to his knowledge of the English language, and 
Greek and Latin in particular. In these he made 
such proficiency, that, on his going to College, he en- 
tered the second class for both ; and, from what I un- 
derstand, acquitted himself much to the satisfaction 
of his professors. 

He is, besides, a young man of the most amiable 
dispositions, and has been trained up to the practice 
of the best religious principles. His manners are 
mild and unassuming, and his modesty not unfre- 
quently prevents him from exhibiting the acquire- 
ments and talents he possesses. In every point of 
view, he is eminently well qualified for becoming a 
teacher of youth ; and from my intimate knowledge 
of his character and attainments as a scholar, it gives 
me the greatest pleasure, conscientiously and undis- 
guisedly, to bear this public testimony in his favour. 

(Signed) " Archibald Dickson." 

The bodily constitution of this promising youth was 



REV. JOHN HENRY GARDNER. 9 

far from robust, and it sustained some injuries in his 
boyhood, from the effects of which he never fully re- 
covered. The excessive fatigue he endured in a 
summer evening's excursion, with a number of his 
schoolmates, had almost proved fatal to his eyesight. 
To this misfortune he alludes in the following 
terms, in a letter regarding the state of his health, ad- 
dressed to a medical man in the year 1830 : — u In 
my tenth year I was seized with blindness in both 
eyes, without any change in the external appearance 
of the organ, but accompanied with a heavy painful 
sensation in the forehead, sometimes in the eyes 
themselves. The sight of one eye returned through 
the use of the means prescribed • but that of the 
other is, to this day, so imperfect that I cannot with 
it alone read the largest ordinary type. The head- 
ach has sometimes returned after much exertion, and 
when I was affected with cold, but not nearly, for 
the most part, with equal severity." To this defect 
in his eyesight was unhappily added a similar defi- 
ciency in hearing, occasioned by a violent and dan- 
gerous illness that seized him about the middle of his 
first session at College. The letter of 1830, in which 
he describes the former infirmity, contains also the 
following allusion to the latter : — a Ever since my 
recovery from a fever in 1821, my hearing has been 
impeded on the same side where my vision is imper- 
fect." 

These, and other early afflictions, were not un- 
heeded or unimproved by this young man. His min- 
ister and his teacher had good cause to bear testi- 
mony to the devout inclinations, as well as the literary 

a 2 



10 



LIFE AND DIARY OF THE 



spirit, he discovered in youth. Scarcely had his men- 
tal faculties begun to open, when he showed a marked 
attention to sacred things. He could read the New 
Testament at the age of four years. Even before he 
was capable of reading, as often happens indeed with 
lively children, he learned a number of psalms and 
hymns. Owing partly to the circumstance that he 
had opportunities of hearing his sisters repeat the 
Westminster Assembly's Shorter Catechism to their 
father, he was found to have committed to memory two 
pages of that valuable summary, ere his parents were 
aware that he was master of a single question. He 
very early adopted, and steadily pursued the practice 
of reading a portion of the Holy Scriptures every 
morning and evening. It was observed, that what he 
read in the Bible and in religious books seemed occa- 
sionally to make a powerful impression on his mind. 
In 1812, when his mother with her children, shortly 
after their removal to Scotland, was spending a few 
weeks at a friend's house in the country, several miles 
distant from the place of public worship, she directed 
them, one Sabbath, before taking leave to go herself 
to church, to keep their room and attend to their 
books ; and at her return^ towards evening, she was 
truly delighted, when her dear boy, perceiving her 
approach, hastened to salute her with a detail of their 
proceedings in her absence ; and, among other things, 
said, " We went about family worship, and Magda- 
lene prayed." At an early period he began himself 
to conduct the devotional exercises of his mother's 
house ; and even his first prayers were characterised 
by unaffected seriousness, united with propriety and 



REV. JOHN HENRY GARDNER. 11 

fluency of expression. From his infancy he had nu- 
merous questions on religious topics to ask. With 
great apparent conscientiousness he inquired particu- 
larly into the difference between right and wrong, 
and endeavoured accurately and clearly to distinguish 
betwixt what he ought to do and what he ought to 
avoid. Actuated by the same feelings, he was care- 
ful and decided in the choice of his companions;, 
strictly shunning the society of foolish and naughty 
boys., and associating with the considerate and vir- 
tuous. 

Whilst every week-day found him going cheerfully 
to school, and profiting by its various exercises, he 
repaired to the sanctuary with similar alacrity on each 
returning Sabbath, and approved himself an attentive 
and interested hearer of the Gospel. He distinctly 
recollected the leading thoughts in the discourses he 
heard, and anxiously cherished the good impressions 
they were fitted to make upon his heart. During 
the period of his attending College, he enjoyed the 
advantage of the ministry partly of Dr Peddie and 
partly of Dr Brown. As a specimen of his solicitude 
to mingle a persevering attention to religion with his 
literary engagements, we may quote the following 
extract from a letter to an uncle, dated Edinburgh, 
-January 7, 1822 : — " Dr Peddie preached, last 
Sabbath, on these words, ' Lord, thou hast been our 
dwelling-place in all generations/ Psalm xc. 1. He 
first remarked that there were three things of a ge- 
neral nature suggested by Moses in these words. 
1st, They are true only with regard to saints. 2dly, 
They go upon the supposition that, in every age of 



12 



LIFE AND DIARY OF THE 



the world, God reserves a seed to serve him. 3dly, 
Moses evidently believed that God would be to his 
people, in that and future generations, all that he had 
been to them in those that were past. He then more 
particularly considered the import of the words. A 
dwelling-place implies a fixed abode, a place of safety, 
and a place of comfort. Oh that, in whatever circum- 
stances we may be placed, we could commit ourselves 
to the care of our heavenly Father, who never ceases 
to care for his people ! " 

The impressive admonitions of Providence, by 
painful bereavements no less than personal ailments, 
concurred with the lessons of Scripture and the faith- 
ful preaching of the Word, to elevate his mind to 
God and everlasting objects. Having lost his dear 
father in 1812, and his maternal grandfather in 
1818, he was also bereaved, in 1821, of Magdalene, 
the elder of his two beloved sisters, a very thoughtful 
and very pleasant girl, who was taken away by a 
severe distemper on the 5th of August, nearly two 
months after having completed her sixteenth year. 
In a letter to a relative, written a few days before 
his amiable sister's decease, he gives an affecting 
account of her sufferings, and concludes with the 
following reflections : — " All this is well calculated 
to remind us of the frailty of our nature; and it 
would be well for us if we endeavoured to improve 
by such warnings, and in the time of health to pre- 
pare for the day of affliction and of death. And 
may we be resigned to the will of our heavenly 
Father, who does all things well, and cast all our 
cares upon Him for time and for eternity." 



REV. JOHN HENRY GARDNER. 



13 



He partook of the Lord's Supper, for the first time, 
on occasion of the administration of that blessed 
ordinance to the congregation in which his grand- 
father had officiated as pastor for nearly half a cen- 
tury, on Sabbath the 12th August, before he had 
completed his fourteenth year. Whether the mortal 
illness of his dear sister, which terminated in her 
dissolution the Sabbath immediately preceding, had 
any special influence on his mind in determining him 
at that time to make a public profession of his faith 
in a crucified Redeemer, and his resolution to devote 
himself wholly to his service, we cannot positively 
affirm. We know, however, that in taking this 
important step he had the advantage of the instruc- 
tions and counsels of the Rev. Mr Baird ; and we 
hope that he acted under the guidance of the great 
Master of the feast. None, whether old or young, 
should venture to approach the Lord's Table till they 
have become savingly acquainted with themselves 
and their Redeemer. But while many sinfully post- 
pone a voluntary and public profession of attachment 
to Christ, the conduct of those young Christians who 
feel constrained by his love promptly to take part in 
the sacramental commemoration of his death, cannot 
be unacceptable to him who says, ie I remember thee 
the kindness of thy youth ;" — " Those that seek me 
early shall find me." 

With much pleasure we record the following me- 
morandum of solemn self-dedication, which was 
written at Glasgow on his birthday, during the first 
session of his attendance at the Divinity Hall, and 
fully two years after his first approach to the com- 



14 



LIFE AND DIARY OF THE 



munion table. It was found in his own short-hand 
writing on a small piece of paper : — 

" Having this day completed my sixteenth year, 
and reflecting on all the goodness of God hitherto, 
especially with regard to the interests of my soul, 
and on my shameful ingratitude to God for his kind- 
ness, especially my coldness and want of love towards 
my Saviour, I desire at this time humbly to confess 
my sins, thank God for his mercies, and, above all, 
lay myself down at the foot of the cross, there to 
receive the pardon of my sins, the cleansing of my 
heart and life, and a title to the eternal inheritance, 
all through the meritorious obedience and satisfactory 
death of my dear Redeemer, to whom I desire to 
owe all that I need for time and eternity ; and to 
whom, with the Father and blessed Spirit, be all 
might, and dominion, and power, and honour, and 
glory, and blessing, now, henceforth, and for ever- 
more. Amen. Lord, I believe ; help mine unbelief ! 

" As a student of divinity also, I would desire to 
put my whole trust in the Lord my righteousness 
and strength, and to undertake this work, as well as 
all other things, in the name of my great Master, 
who is able to make his grace sufficient for me, and 
to perfect his strength in my weakness. I must fail 
if I trust in my own strength ; but I confide in thy 
promise, O thou Saviour of sinners, thou Father of 
the fatherless, thou Shaddai, all-sufficient ! 

a John Henry Gardner. 

« This 11th day of Sept. 1823." 

The Christian ministry was not merely a profes- 



REV. JOHN HENRY GARDNER. 



15 



sion to which his attention was directed by the voice 
of relatives and friends, bnt the object of his own 
cordial choice. The views by which he was actuated, 
at the very commencement of theological study, are 
manifest from the paper just copied, and from a 
variety of letters written at that period. One of these, 
dated July 14, 1823, is addressed to his surviving 
sister : — " I was at Lanark," says he, " on Tuesday 
last week, was examined before a Presbytery of three 
ministers and as many elders, and admitted to the 
Hall. I have got for my text, ' Christ Jesus came 
into the world to save sinners/ 1 Tim. i. 15. Oh, it 
is a faithful saying ! Oh, it is worthy of all accep- 
tation ! May you and I feel its force on our hearts. 
Now, my dear sister, I beseech you to think se- 
riously of the difficult but glorious work in which 
I have embarked. Cease not to make mention of 
me in your prayers, that Emmanuel's grace may be 
sufficient for me, and his strength perfected in my 
weakness." In a letter to a cousin, he expresses him- 
self as follows : — ci I do, I trust, see the necessity of 
a vigorous pursuit of intellectual improvement ; but 
this is not to students, any more than to any one 
else, the one thing needful. Nay, if religion be neces- 
sary to any man, surely it is doubly so to the student 
in divinity. I earnestly request, therefore, that you 
will use every means in your power, by supplicating 
the mercy-seat, and by epistolary conversation, to 
endeavour to promote my advancement in real reli- 
gion. Without this all-important qualification, how 
can the minister of the Gospel set himself in earnest 
to advance the glory of the Redeemer, or save the 
souls of men ? It is my most ardent desire that, if I 



16 



LIFE AND DIARY OF THE 



should be allowed to deliver from the pulpit the faith- 
ful saying and worthy of all acceptation, I may be 
able to say, in my heart at least, with the apostle 
Paul, that this is the anchor of my own soul — that 
Christ Jesus came into the world to save sinners, of 
whom I am chief." 

The reader will observe, that in the letter to his 
sister just quoted, he states that he was admitted to 
the study of divinity by a Presbytery that met at 
Lanark. His being examined and admitted by that 
Presbytery, it should be noted, was owing to the cir- 
cumstance that, in summer 1823, he removed from 
his mother's house, Auchtermuchty, within the bounds 
of the United Associate Presbytery of Cupar, to a 
village included in the district superintended by the 
Presbytery of Lanark, where he then began to occupy 
a school. His first attempt in public teaching was 
made in autumn 1822, when for a few weeks he sup- 
plied the place of a young relative at Houston, in the 
parish of Uphall. The following summer he proposed 
himself a candidate for one of the four schools en- 
dowed by the late Mr James "Wilson, merchant in 
Whitburn. Having presented his certificates, and 
been examined, along with about six other candi- 
dates, May 20, 1823, by several clergymen in the 
presence of the trustees, he was chosen teacher of the 
school at Foldhouse, in the parish of Whitburn. Here 
he commenced his labours at the beginning of the 
succeeding month ; and with the exception of the 
period annually allowed him for attendance on the 
Divinity Class, continued faithfully to discharge his 
duty for the space of three years. 



REV. JOHN HENRY GARDNER. 



17 



PERIOD II. 

FROM HIS ENTRANCE ON THE STUDY OF DIVINITY TO THE 
CLOSE OF HIS CURRICULUM OF FIVE SESSIONS. 

No part of Mr Gardner's life, very possibly, was 
happier than that which intervened betwixt his en- 
trance on theological studies, and the time of his 
receiving license to preach the everlasting Gospel ; 
and this remark seems particularly applicable to the 
years of his residence in the parish of Whitburn. 
From various communications to relatives, it ap- 
pears that he was thoroughly satisfied with his lot, 
and knew how to estimate the advantages arising 
from the ministry and friendship of the Rev. John 
Brown, the kindness of other pious persons around 
him, and from the opportunities for study and devo- 
tion afforded by a local situation peculiarly rural and 
sequestered. The following extracts will serve to con- 
firm this statement. 

In a letter to an uncle, ' ' dated Glasgow, September 
1823," he thus expresses himself : — u I gave up the 
school on the 22d August. The number of scholars 
was forty. I have, since I came, experienced the 
greatest kindness from Mr Brown and other gentle- 
men, and have as yet, so far as I know, agreed with 
the people. I am to re-open the school as soon as 
the harvest at Foldhouse is over. Mr Brown has 
several students under his care, whom he is to meet 
with, now and then, for the purpose of religious 



18 



LIFE AND DIARY OF THE 



conversation and worship." A subsequent epistle, of 
date " Foldhouse, February 1824," contains the fol- 
lowing passage : — " You have doubtless heard how 
much my school has increased during winter. I 
have on my list sixty-six names, all of whom still 
attend except four. I am busily engaged in school 
from ten to three o'clock. This I think rather much 
labour for me ; yet I could scarce, I fear, abridge it, 
without giving great offence. Mr Brown continues 
exceedingly attentive and kind to me. He has had 
two meetings of students since my return, at which 
we were examined on the Scriptures, and on the 
being and perfections of God. Five, perhaps six of 
us, intend to form a society, as soon as possible. I 
attend a fellowship meeting near this, of which my 
worthy and kind friend, Mr Waddell of Crofthead, 
is a member. I desire to be grateful for so many 
opportunities of increasing in the knowledge of my 
Lord and Saviour." In a letter to his mother, he 
says to the same effect : — " I have found Mr Wad- 
dell and Mr Brown just as I expected. Mr W. is, 
as Mr Brown described him, uncommon for know- 
ledge and piety. As an example of Mr Brown's 
kindness, take the following. He said to me several 
times, c I'll be a father to you, as far as I can.' One 
of his good advices, when speaking of studying for 
the ministry was, e Look up for the unction of the 
Holy One.' " Another letter addressed to a relative, 
a considerable time after, contains the following state- 
ment : — " In Mr Brown's friendship and counsel I 
am very happy. Often he takes me to his study, and 
prays with me." 



REV. JOHN HENRY GARDNER. 



19 



Mr Brown himself, in a short letter to the subject 
of this memoir, written probably in 1823, gives him 
advice and encouragement in the most endearing 
terms : — " I hope you will continue to try to impress 
upon the children the important matters of their sal- 
vation. God has dwelt long in the family from whom 
you are descended ; this you will find a strong obli- 
gation on you to do as much as possible for his cause. 
— My dear friend, yours, J. Brown." A letter of 
a subsequent date is couched in similar expressions : 
— u My dear young friend, I am glad you are well. 
I hope you will have much improvement under the 
prelections of Dr Dick. You have, I think, early 
known the Redeemer. This will lead you to study 
divinity as a Christian, and to have your own soul 
fed with the truth. Do all the good you can in 
society, and among the younger students/' 

John Henry's private memoranda, no less than his 
letters, abound with allusions to the very kind and 
beneficial attentions he and his fellow-students in that 
vicinity experienced from Mr Brown, of which we 
present the following specimens, written at different 
dates : — u Attended a meeting of students in Mr 
Brown's. We were examined on predestination, 
creation, and providence. Mr Brown gave us ad- 
vices respecting our reading, our prayers, our com- 
panions, our scholars, &c. I read my critical exer- 
cise before the society ; Mr N. also read his." — " Mr 
Brown visited this neighbourhood to-day. How un- 
wearied is my aged friend in the discharge of his 
ministerial duty ! How devoted to the glory of his 
Master, and the immortal benefit of precious souls I" 



20 



LIFE AND DIARY OF THE 



— " Mr Brown examined the students on the person 
and offices of our blessed Redeemer." — ft Mr Brown 
and I — have gone to Inverkeithing sacrament. Mr B. 
left a note for me, dated Thursday, which I received 
yesterday, reminding me that it is the duty of Chris- 
tians to remember one another in prayer, especially 
when the Lord's Supper is dispensed any where. I 
hope I shall not overlook this important and agree- 
able duty." 

Having thus alluded to a Diary written by the 
subject of this narrative, we may state that it was 
begun in his seventeenth year, and kept up, with less 
or more regularity, almost to the day of his death. 
It seems proper also to cite a few sentences from its 
first entry, from which it appears that a pure sense 
of duty impelled him to undertake this record ; and 
a subsequent passage, where he assigns a satisfactory 
reason for the minuteness of some of its details : — 

" Foldhouse, near Whitburn, Thursday , July 1, 
1824. — I have often thought of keeping a kind of 
Journal, for setting down the principal features of 
Providence respecting me, and the principal dealings 
of my heavenly Father with my soul. Through 
sinful procrastination, to which I am naturally in- 
clined, I have hitherto neglected this important duty. 
After reading a part of the Memoir of Henry Mar- 
tyn, I see so plainly the advantages of recording 
Christian experience, that I resolve, in the strength 
of my dear Saviour, to attempt it." 

" August 15, 1825. — Although it is possible that 
these memoranda may meet the eye of some friend 
after my death, yet I write for myself only. Did I 



REV. JOHN HENRY GARDNER. 



2] 



write for others, I should blush at relating so many 
trivial circumstances in these pages, that cannot inte- 
rest a single individual but myself. The reason I jot 
them down is, that though in themselves unimpor- 
tant, yet they serve, by association, to recall to my 
mind the sentiments and feelings that occupied it 
while they were passing, in a more lively manner 
than a written account of those sentiments and feel 
ings could have done." 

The writer is in some degree aware, he trusts, 
of the caution and delicacy that are necessary in 
quoting from the journals of the deceased ; and this 
explanation, left by his beloved relative himself, 
should doubtless exert a salutary influence in pre- 
cluding all such extracts as could serve no valuable 
purpose to the Christian reader. 

From various passages in letters addressed to his 
nearest connexions, as well as from several entries in 
his journal, it appears that, in common with not a few 
of those whom God appoints to public service in the 
Church, he was for a time the subject of exceedingly 
deep and agonizing convictions. Impressed with the 
horrid evil of sin, and feeling the native enmity of 
his heart against God in all its odiousness, he was 
almost tempted to despair. The riches of divine 
mercy, however, and the boundless merit of atoning 
blood, were so revealed to his mind that he obtained 
a happy relief, and was enabled not only to " turn to 
the stronghold," but to abide in that refuge, and to 
a comfort others with the same comfort wherewith he 
himself was comforted of God." A letter to his 



22 



LIFE AND DIARY OP THE 



mother, dated " Foldhouse, 21st June 1823," con- 
tains the following passage : — ci My dear mother, I 
think myself happy here, provided I hear that you are 
happy. I hope that, though at a great distance, you 
will still take an interest in my concerns. Above all, 
Oh ! never forget to pray for me — that you and I, and 
my dear sister, and all our friends, may he one in 
Christ. Alas ! alas ! I am utterly unworthy of any 
person's prayers ; but have not I the more need of 
them ? If I venture to tell any person, it ought to 
be you, that, hard-hearted as I am, the Spirit of 
Christ has enabled me to risk my all for time and 
eternity on the Rock of Ages, and to Jehovah my 
righteousness be all the glory. I am extremely un- 
grateful, often sinning ; but his mercy endureth for 
ever." 

Writing to his sister at a subsequent date, he 
alludes still more particularly to his religious expe- 
rience : — " As for myself, I never had any particular 
concern about my soul until the second year of my 
attendance at College, when ' Alleine's Alarm,' and 
' Doolittle on the Lord's Supper,' sometimes made 
me tremble for fear of everlasting burnings. These 
impressions, however, though they never since com- 
pletely died away, did not immediately draw me to 
the Saviour. I saw that I ought to glorify God and 
save my soul, but I loved my sins better than both. 
If I have now been turned from darkness to light, I 
cannot tell exactly when that blessed change took place. 
I think, however, it was some considerable time after 
my coming to Foldhouse. Sometimes I yet ask 
myself, ' but can such a vile wretch have really been 



REV. JOHN HENRY GARDNER. 23 

a subject of regenerating grace ? Is it possible that, 
if I bare any love to God, I should be so little devoted 
to his glory, and so little hate sin ? ' The only 
answer I can give is, ' that surely I am very different 
from what I once was. Once, I could not think of 
God without secret dislike and jealousy ; now, I can 
approach him as my father and friend, and nothing 
grieves me so much as that I should not love him 
and serve him as he deserves. Once, all the concern 
I had for other people's souls led me to form rash 
judgments of their religious characters j now, I think 
I should be willing to do or endure any thing, that I 
might be the means of winning souls to Christ. And 
when I think of these things, I feel it a debt I owe to 
Divine grace to conclude favourably/ " 

In the following extract from his Diary he explains 
his own religious feelings by comparing them with 
those of another: "July 28, 1824.— Read this 
morning the 14th chapter of John. Perused the half 
of a little book, entitled ' False Hope Destroyed, and 
Despair Removed,' which I have from Mr Brown. 
The experience of the writer, previous to conversion, 
was, in many respects, very similar to my own during 
the year 1822 and part of 1823. Let me look back with 
lively gratitude on the horrible pit from which I have 
been drawn by divine love, and cleave more closely 
to the solid rock on which I trust I now rest. I 
cannot say that I was long at one time in absolute 
despair, as that gentleman was, but I was very often 
on the borders of it. What he says about the ima- 
gined possibility of dethroning the Almighty, is truly 
horrifying to think of ; but I verily believe that his 



24 



LIFE AND DIARY OP THE 



heart could not harbour more enmity against God 
than mine then did, although perhaps it never assumed 
that specific form. He mentioned his trying to plead 
the freest promises at the throne of grace, and not 
being able to find any access to the Father of Spirits. 
This is very like my case. I can now, however, con- 
stantly rest on words like these, ' Him that cometh 
unto me I will in nowise cast out.' " 

His whole soul was richly embued with evangelical 
sentiment. The cross of Christ was his only resource. 
To this he betook himself, at once for peace to his 
wounded conscience, and for incentives to purity in 
heart and conduct. Nor was he an utter stranger to 
the joy of faith. Redeeming love was the object of his 
delightful contemplation, and he gladly embraced op- 
portunities of encouraging his correspondents, as well 
as his own soul, to rely on a faithful God, and to regard 
Him as their portion and chief happiness, both for this 
world and the next. ei Oh, precious Saviour ! " says 
he at one time, " my hiding-place from all my foes. 
I flee to thy everlasting arms, to be protected against 
my very self." — " I have this evening," he says again, 
" experienced something like a revival in devotion. 
Still, however, it is indeed a day of small things. It 
is dangerous to look much on our experiences them- 
selves, as a ground of hope that we shall yet see 
better days. We ought rather to fix our attention 
on those truths which excited our love, our penitence, 
mir hope, our joy, and by this means these blessed 
states of mind will be perpetuated and strengthened." 

A long entry, comprising a variety of incidents, is 
thus concluded : — " I ought to reckon it a very great 



REV. JOHN HENRY GARDNER. 



25 



mercy that, when not under deep impressions of the 
Divine presence and the Divine love, I cannot feel 
happy. Thus my Heavenly Father, when I forsake 
him, hedges my way with thorns, prevents me from 
finding rest, that I may return to Him as my only 
real and satisfying portion. I do not indeed feel so 
oppressed with the weight of sin that hangs upon me 
and weighs me down to earth, nor is my longing- 
after the enjoyment of my God so ardent as might 
well be expected, when for a season I lose my sense 
of his favour ; yet I do feel that nothing less than 
God and holiness will satisfy me. Oh ! when will 
the day come — a day by me to be eternally remem- 
bered — when I shall see Jehovali s face without a 
cloud intervening, and appear before him washed in 
the blood of the Lamb, with not one spot remaining 
to dim the lustre of the Divine image ? I know it 
fast approaches; but I cannot be satisfied while I am 
making so little if any sensible progress towards that 
state of purity into which it will introduce me." 

In a letter from Foldhouse to his mother, he endea- 
vours to animate her confidence in God by the fol- 
lowing words : — " I trust that, before this time, you 
have completely recovered from your late severe cold. 
Whatever be the circumstances you are in, I rejoice 
to believe that He carethfor yoa, whose past loving- 
kindness you never think of but with a glowing 
heart, and who is ' the same yesterday, to-day, and 
for ever/ There is not, there cannot be, a more 
pleasant state of mind than that in which, with 
unspeakable satisfaction, the soul veers, as if by 
instinct, towards the God and Father of our Lord 

B 



26 



LIFE AND DIARY OF THE 



Jesus — in which, when friends abound, we can see 
beyond them all to the kind hand that prompts them 
forward to acts of friendship, and in which, when our 
comforts decline, from whatever cause, we can still 
say with the Psalmist, ' Thou art the strength of my 
heart, and my portion for ever.' I would give rise to 
incorrect ideas of the temperature of my mind, were 
I to say that such is unvaryingly its happy condition • 
but I can say this much, that I speak so far from 
experience, that, when I am not in this state of mind, 
I feel unhappy, and when I am, I think the moments 
during which I continue in it, more precious than a 
whole eternity of different feelings." 

In replying to a valued friend who had written to 
him with much Christian frankness at the close of a 
season, he feelingly recognises the constraining power 
of the cross. " I am happy, indeed, to think you 
were employed so properly at the conclusion of the 
year. My own unstableness during the past year fits 
me for using with you (but with a tenfold greater 
emphasis) the language of confession and regret. 
But let us never think of our sins without at the 
same time thinking of our Saviour who bore them. 
Ah ! it is lamentably true that we have advanced 
little in the cultivation of the Divine image in our 
own souls, and have done almost nothing for the 
honour of the religion of Jesus, and the salvation of 
the souls of sinners. Must we then satisfy ourselves 
with an undefined regret, that we are not at all what 
we should be ? No ; if we wish thoroughly to feel 
our past inactivity, or to arm ourselves with well- 
formed resolutions for the future, let us look to the 



REV. JOHN HENRY GARDNER. 



27 



cross. that the Holy Spirit would open our 
eyes to behold the amazing sight. Who is he whose 
body, but more his spirit, writhes in agony unutter- 
able ? It is Emmanuel, the Creator of all worlds, 
in the likeness of sinful flesh. It is our Redeemer, 
our Friend. He suffers the very tortures we should 
have eternally borne, and has delivered us from the 
curse of the law, being made a curse for us. And 
can we ever be cold in his service ? Can we refuse 
either to labour or to suffer for his dear sake ? Oh ! 
shall we not rather be willing even to die, if neces- 
sary, for the name of the Lord Jesus? And yet 
our experience tells us that often we are cold in the 
service of Emmanuel, and that, instead of being ready 
to die for him, we are scarcely willing to live for 
him. But why is it thus ? Just because the cross 
is too seldom before our thoughts." 

The gracious change he had undergone was mani- 
fested by the frequency and alacrity with which he 
called on God by prayer, while his progress in the 
Divine life was greatly promoted by means of this 
exercise. His journal supplies numerous evidences 
of the importance he attached, both to his own sup- 
plications and the intercessions of others on his 
behalf, as appointed means of receiving the most 
valuable blessings.— " Sabbath, Sept. 19, 1824. This 
morning read the 79th Psalm, and enjoyed consider- 
able comfort in prayer. In the evening read the last 
chapter of Romans, and was enabled to pray earnestly, 
and, I hope, with faith and expectation. The prin- 
cipal subject of my petitions was my need of Divine 



28 



LIFE AND DIARY OP THE 



grace to enable me to do anything good. My heart 
is so lamentably deceitful, so awfully, so desperately 
wicked, that nothing short of this can have the 
smallest good effect that will prove permanent." — 
a Dec. 14. For a short while after the dismissal of 
the school, I enjoyed more than ordinary communion 
with my Heavenly Father in prayer. I felt as if I 
could not leave the footstool of mercy, before obtain- 
ing a blessing on myself and my scholars. I had 
another delightful season of this kind near midnight, 
at the usual time of my evening devotion. I was 
strengthened by Divine grace to look beyond myself 
and all created excellence, to the perfect sacrifice of 
Jesus Christ, of which I was reading in the 10th of 
Hebrews, on the foundation of which I could ap- 
proach my redeeming God in the full assurance of 
faith. How inconceivably rich and glorious is free 
grace \" — a Dec. 25. After prayer in the morning, 
I could say, in language something like that of the 
Roman senator, e One hour's communion with God, 
through his dear Son, is worth a whole eternity of 
worldly joys/" — "Jan. 9, Sabbath, 1825. I was 
blessed with two very pleasant seasons of prayer this 
evening, one immediately after coming home, the 
other after supper and family worship. I had just 
been reading with tears, I trust of love and joy, the 
1st chapter of Revelation. I was much captivated 
by the majestic and eloquent description given by 
the beloved disciple, of the appearance of his and my 
great Redeemer. I felt I could not be happy unless 
Jesus were my all and in all, and unless my person, 
my studies, my scholars, and my friends, were under 



REV. JOHN HENRY GARDNER. 



29 



his management and care. ' Who is like the Living 
One, who was dead and is alive for evermore — 
u Jan. 30, 1826. Got considerable comfort in prayer 
this evening, my heart being enlarged to entreat for 
all who are dear to me the loving-kindness of a 
redeeming God, and to pray that the Redeemer 
might be exalted and made very high in the salva- 
tion of many sinners, I again go to resign myself 
to sleep. To whom shall I commit my unconscious 
spirit, and my defenceless body ? Who shall keep 
away from my dwelling the thief and the robber ? 
Who shall guard my soul from the more formidable 
destroyers that seek its endless ruin, my lusts, and 
the god of this world ? Oh ! Friend of sinners, my 
friend, my God, thou shalt be my shield ; I shall 
come under the shadow of thy wings, and safely 
lodge myself in my everlasting hiding-place. Oh ! 
take not thy Holy Spirit from me." — " April 13. 
Amid a good deal of wandering, I was enabled this 
evening to hold some fellowship with God in prayer. 
I was led to pray particularly about the number of 
my years on earth. I did not ask a multitude of 
days, nor did I entreat a speedy removal to a world 
of glory; but I besought my God to fit me for the 
toils and sufferings of years, if years be appointed 
me ; or if otherwise, and I am to be called to eternity 
in the beginning of my days, I prayed that I might 
hasten unto the coming of my Lord, and say with 
John, 'Even so, Lord Jesus, come quickly.' I am 
not yet the broken and contrite sinner I wish to be, 
When shall my stony heart become a heart of flesh ? 
Lord, when thou sheddest abroad thy love in my 



30 



LIFE AND DIARY OF THE 



soul. ' Come then, Spirit of adoption, fill me with 
light and love and purity ; for till I have some mea- 
sure of light and love and purity, I shall never be 
broken in spirit for my darkness, my deadness, and 
my sin.' " 

We have seen the humility and earnestness with 
which he solicited the prayers of his mother. That 
he put a similar value on those of his pious grand- 
mother, is manifest from the following extract of a 
letter to her, dated Glasgow, Sept. 29, 1825 : — " I 
hope, therefore, you will excuse my not coming to 
Airdrie, and not attribute it to any want of affection 
on my part. I am sure you believe me when I say 
that I often think of you, and make mention of you 
at our Heavenly Father s throne. I hope you do not 
forget the peculiar need I have of your prayers, as a 
student. Students need more than ordinary wisdom, 
zeal, love, seriousness. Pray then, dear grandmother, 
that these may be granted me from the repository of 
all fulness." 

His veneration for the Holy Scriptures- was deep 
and persevering ; and whilst he read them daily, he 
devoutly listened to the lessons they inculcate, and 
increasingly experienced their salutary influence and 
consoling power — u August 13, 1824. Read in the 
evening the 13th of Leviticus, which treats of the 
plague of leprosy. I read for a considerable time 
before I recollected what a fit emblem it is of the 
dreadful and deep-rooted disease we bring into the 
world with us, and which we nowhere can be cleansed 
from but in the fountain opened for sin and unclean- 



I 



REV. JOHN HENRY GARDNER. 



33 



ness. I was enabled by Divine grace to feel my 
weakness, and, in the act of applying at that precious 
dispensary, to cry out with the leper, ' Unclean, un- 
clean.'" — ec Nov. 18, 1825. At my evening devo- 
tions I read the 4th of 1st John. 1 see a beauti- 
ful connexion through the whole of that chapter, 
which I never was able to trace before. It is, indeed, 
one of the simplest and least ornamented passages 
in all the Bible. Yet, can there be any thing more 
precious to a sinner than the indubitable testimony 
it contains to the love of God, and the grand mani- 
festation of it — his sending his Son to be the Saviour 
of the world ? Nay, can there be any thing more 
sublime ? e God is love ; herein is love, not that we 
loved God, but that he loved us, and sent his Son to 
be the propitiation for our sins.' How vast the idea ! 
Can a human intellect grasp it ? It is like an invi- 
sible animalcule trying to comprehend, in one wide 
conception, the vastness of creation. It is deep, I 
cannot fathom it ; it is high, I cannot reach its sum- 
mit ; its breadth and its length baffle the straining 
mind. Oh, to be lost in wonder, in sweet and holy 
amazement ! Though I cannot comprehend it, may 
it be all my study, and all my delight. May I die 
with the love of God in my heart and in my tongue, 
and sing its praises to eternity, amid ransomed mil- 
lions."-—" Feb. 10, 1826. I have just been read- 
ing the 132d Psalm, and found relief to my hun- 
gry spirit from the promise, ' I will satisfy her poor 
with bread.' I knelt before my heavenly Father as 
one of the poor of Zion, whom he has promised to 
bless." 



.32 



LIFE AND DIARY OF THE 



Actuated by an ardent thirst for Scriptural know- 
ledge, he studied the book of inspiration in the ori- 
ginal tongues, and persisted with much assiduity 
and pleasure in his efforts to ascertain the true import 
of its language, and to learn with accuracy the whole 
counsel of God. In a letter to a relative he says, 
" I continue to read the Hebrew Psalter with much 
pleasure, and also the New Testament." His journal, 
too, contains the following entry : — u May I'd, 1826. 
Yesterday I had a parcel and letter from R — t 
S — n. The parcel contained my Greek Testament, 
with the various readings I so much desired, and an 
interleaved English Bible with marginal references I 
had ordered him to send me, both of which may be 
of very essential service to me in the critical study 
of the Scriptures. Blessed Spirit of Truth, accom- 
pany these means of understanding thy word with 
thine effectual blessing ; for without thee I can do 
nothing. Make me mighty in the Scriptures ; and 
the more I know them, may I love them the more, 
and be the more conformed to them by purity and 
heavenly-mindedness." 

In the perusal of human writings on religion, as 
well as the sacred volume, it was uniformly his en- 
deavour to unite the cultivation of the heart with the 
improvement of the intellect, and to keep Iris mind 
altogether open to the practical impression of the 
truth. This statement is apparently justified by the 
following specimen of the devout reflections and 
personal application he was accustomed to make : 
— u Aug. 6, 1824. In the evening read the first 
seventy pages of Henry Kirk Whites Remains. I 



REV. JOHN HENRY GARDNER. 33 

have by no means talents to be compared in the 
slightest degree with his. But, no doubt, I have 
some talents. I have been endeavouring to lay these 
at the feet of Him from whom they proceeded, as 
their source. Often do I pray, when thinking on 
this subject, ' Lord Jesus, receive my spirit V And 
what else would a soul redeemed by the precious 
blood of Jesus say ? What ! shall I devote even the 
little talent of which I am possessed, to any thing 
short of magnifying my dear Emmanuel ? No ; 
whatever my unbelieving, sinful, fretful heart may 
often suggest to the contrary, let it never be." — 
u . August 13. After tea, read Henry Kirk White s 
Remains. Charmed with the change wrought in 
him by Divine grace. I wish to be grateful for the 
invaluable advantages I have enjoyed in point of 
education. Though decidedly serious, Henry, at 
least so far as I have read, has an unsafe way of ex- 
pressing himself about conditional salvation, very 
unlike that of our Marrow divines, even the most 
shallow of them." — " May 2, 1825. I am reading 
Witsins's c Dissertation on the Crucifixion and Death 
of Christ/ He is very warm. My feelings in read- 
ing are generally frozen, compared with those he 
must have experienced in writing." A letter to a 
cousin, written in the same month, contains the fol- 
lowing notice of a celebrated poem : — " I am read- 
ing Young's Night Thoughts ; and there I find some 
of the sublimest thoughts that ever were conceived 
or uttered by an uninspired mortal on the subject of 
immortality. I am at present at the very best part 
of the poem, ' The Fourth Night. 5 I like that part 

b 2 



34 



LIFE AND DIARY OF THE 



better than any other I have yet read ; for this reason, 
that he draws consolation in view of eternity, directly 
from its only genuine source, the cross of Him who 
hath brought life and immortality to light through 
the Gospel. Yet even the other parts, which are 
perhaps more philosophical than religious, are very 
sublime, and fully contradict what he says at the 
end of the ' First Night '— 

' I roll their raptures, but not catch their flame.' " 

With whatever sentiments of esteem and admira- 
tion he regarded wise and good men whose writings 
he consulted, or whose conversation he enjoyed, it 
was not his practice to repose a blind and implicit 
confidence in their authority. On various topics, at 
least, he thought very freely, and very maturely, for 
himself ; and nothing afforded him greater delight 
than to receive heavenly truth, directly, pure and 
unadulterated, from its original source. " After my 
evening devotion, in which I felt considerable plea- 
sure and comfort," says he, in July 1824, " I spent 
nearly two hours in studying the doctrine of elec- 
tion. Let me not try to fathom such a mystery — 
let me never think of it without holy awe, because 
hidden things belong to the Lord our God, but those 
that are revealed unto us. Let me give all diligence 
to make my calling and election sure. Whether I 
am elected or not, is a question I cannot, in the first 
instance, answer. But let me lay hold of the precious 
promises addressed, not to the elect, but to sinners of 
every description ; and then I may safely conclude 
that I was chosen in Christ before the foundation of 
the world. Oh, may I be to the praise of the glory 



REV. JOHN HENRY GARDNER. 



35 



of his grace, who hath made me accepted in the Be- 
loved ! " 

On the nature of faith, that much disputed topic, 
he felt particularly anxious to form Scriptural and 
accurate ideas. At one time, after leaving some 
friends in whose company he delighted, he has this 
memorandum — " We had a great deal of conversa- 
tion on the nature of saving faith, which I hope may 
have been useful to us all." At a subsequent date 
he adds, " The controversy on faith was maintained 
with some smartness to-night ; and I am afraid that 
speaking of the powers of the soul, or rather the 
soul itself, (for such is the gross notion that keen 
debates almost unavoidably introduce,) as divided 
into the understanding and the will, does not tend to 
illustrate, but to darken the subject ; and therefore 
I wish in future, in speaking of faith, to avoid say- 
ing that it is a simple act of the understanding, but 
only to speak of the soul's believing, or counting 
true, the Divine testimony." 

His views regarding the immediate access which, 
according to the Gospel, sinners have to the Saviour, 
are thus expressed in a letter to a relative, of date, 
Foldhouse, July 7, 1825 : — " I agree most cordially 
with Mr Brown in attaching great importance to the 
Marrow, or rather the Bible doctrine, of the gift of 
Christ to sinners as such. This delightful and heart- 
warming beam of Divine grace, is sufficient to en- 
lighten and cheer us, when, with regard to every 
thing else, such as past experience and marks of 
grace, we walk in darkness and have no light. For 
want of a distinct conception and steady recollection 



LIFE AND DIARY OF THE 



of this part of evangelical truth, (if I may so speak 
of what is in fact the substance of the Gospel,,) I 
think it was, that, in the summer of the year 1822, 
I was in a most uneasy state of mind, and one most 
inimical to the cultivation of holiness. While at 

K that summer. Doddridge's Rise and Progress 

was my constant manual. That excellent hook seems 
lacking, if not in the doctrine of the gift of Christ, 
at least in the way of exhibiting it. There is not a 
word said of it, till a good deal of time has been 
taken up in endeavouring to convince the sinner. 
Now there is no question but we must feel, and 
deeply feel, our need of the Saviour, before we can 
accept of him. Yet I cannot help thinking it very 
improper intentionally to keep him out of sight till the 
fears be aroused and the feelings melted. To look 
at him is the best method for causing tears of contri- 
tion to flow. Why fear that any sinner will too soon 
believe ? No doubt there is danger of presumptuous 
hope • but the danger on the hand of legality and 
final unbelief is much greater." 

During his residence at Foldhouse, the Christian 
Sabbath, with its exercises, was peculiarly dear. The 
evangelical simplicity and energy that characterised 
the discourses he heard, made the happiest impres- 
sions on his mind, while the anticipations of the 
morning, and the reflections of the evening, afforded 
inexpressible delight. In several letters to friends, 
he explicitly acknowledges the great benefit he reaped 
from Mr Brown's ministry, as the means, in parti- 
cular, of giving him more " cheering and consolatory 



REV. JOHN HENRY GARDNER. 



37 



views of the Gospel" than he had previously imbibed. 
ci Formerly," says he, M I knew not how to plead the 
promises of the Gospel, nor how to appropriate the 
Saviour and his blood-bought blessings to myself f 
but having heard for some time that venerable ser- 
vant of Christ, ei these subjects seemed to change 
their aspect ; and what was doubt and difficulty be- 
fore., was converted into hope and welcome." The 
memoranda successively recorded in his journal, still 
further manifest the holy joy he experienced under 
the glad sound of the Gospel. 

" July 13, 1824.— Had very few scholars to-day, 
as there was a kind of fair at Whitburn. It is but 
a very few years since a fair-day was anticipated by 
me as the happiest I could possibly enjoy. Now, I 
think the prospect of a Sabbath, especially a Com- 
munion Sabbath — O that I might safely add an 
eternal Sabbath ! — is far more delightful." — i( Nov. 14. 
Mr Brown lectured on Jacob's meeting Esau, and 
preached again on ' How shall we escape, if we 
neglect so great salvation ? ' Had some sweet medi- 
tation on the character of God on the road home at 
night. When I passed Mr Waddell's house, I could 
not refrain from stopping and craving a blessing on the 
dwelling of one who loves and serves the Redeemer. 
Spent the remaining part of the evening in reading 
the Scottish Missionary Register for October, in 
which are related many conquests of the King of 
Zion. May the number increase, and his subjects 
appear like the grass of the fields ! " — fi Nov. 21 . 
Mr Brown lectured on Jacob's wrestling with the 



38 



LIFE AND DIARY OP THE 



Redeemer, and preached from Psalm xxv. 11, 12, 
' What man fears God ? His soul shall dwell at 
ease.' Felt somewhat of the delightful peace of mind 
on which Mr Brown sweetly expatiated. It is a 
Messed thing indeed to trust in the God and Father 
of our Lord Jesus Christ." — " Nov. 26. Read 
Brown s large Catechism on the covenant of works, 
with a view to Mr Brown's examination of the stu- 
dents to-morrow. I have still to acknowledge the 
light of my Redeemer's countenance. Sweet, sweet 
are the rays of the Sun of righteousness, breaking 
through the darkness of my natural state." 

" Jan. 16, 1825. — My mind exceedingly trifling 
almost the whole day ; had, however, some tastes of 
the sweetness of the Redeemer and his grace. Mr 
Brown lectured on Jacob's vision at Bethel, and 
preached a second time on Rom. vi. 14, ' Sin shall 
not have dominion over you ; for ye are not under 
the law, but under grace.' From his conclusion, I 
was encouraged to believe that I was delivered from 
the curse and power of the broken law, and joined 
to the Surety of the better covenant." — " Feb. 20. 
Mr Brown lectured Psalm cix. 11 — 21, and preached 
a sermon intended especially for young children, from 
Matt. xxi. 15, 16. I have been graciously favoured 
with some refreshing draughts by the fountain of 
mercy." — " March 13. Mr Brown preached again 
on the good fight, by way of improvement. One of 
his evidences of our fighting the good fight of faith, 
was love to the Captain of salvation. I do think I 
have some esteem for my blessed Master, although 



REA . JOHN HENRY GARDNER. 



39 



feeble, indistinct, and intermitting, and infinitely 
disproportioned to what he deserves from every 
sinner, and from none more than myself." 

u April 30, 1826. — Mr Brown again preached on 
the throne of grace. He said many sweet things, 
which I hope have been useful to many, though not 
to me. There were some of his remarks, however, 
which the Holy Spirit was pleased to carry into my 
heart ; and I think I am more resolved than ever to 
make the throne of grace my constant resort, my 
only refuge. He told us an anecdote of an excellent 
man much given to prayer. That holy man was 
asked why he continued so long in secret prayer ? 
His answer was, it is often long before I obtain com- 
munion with God ; and when I do obtain it, it is so 
sweet I cannot think of leaving the enjoyment of it." 

The sacramental solemnities of Whitburn congre- 
gation, and of other congregations in that district, at 
which Mr Brown was accustomed to assist, proved 
deeply interesting, and eminently beneficial to this 
young man. A few extracts will serve to show his 
alacrity in availing himself of these opportunities of 
spiritual improvement, and his care in reviewing the 
manner in which he heard the Gospel, and renewed 
his approaches to the Lord's Table, as well as in the 
preparatory examination of his state and conduct. 

u July 2, 1024. — I endeavoured to entreat the 
Lord for a remarkable effusion of the Spirit at the 
approaching solemnity, that we may draw water with 
joy from the wells of salvation." — r< July 4. This 
day has given me good reasons both for saying, f God 



40 



LIFE AND DIARY OF THE 



be merciful to me a sinner,' and ' Bless the Lord, 
my soul ! forget not all his benefits/ For several 
days past I have felt a more firm assurance of my 
interest in Christ than ever I formerly had. Well 
might I look on this with some jealousy, considering 
the fearful deceitfulness of my abominable heart, had 
I not been also enabled to lay hold on the precious 
promises of the Gospel as a poor sinner, and to 
maintain upon my soul some sense of the surpassing 
excellence of the Redeemer. Mr Brown preached 
his action sermon from Psalm xxiv. 7, ' Lift up your 
heads, ye gates,' &c. Mr Ebenezer fenced the 
table. He preached in the evening from Acts vii. 
59, - Lord Jesus, receive my spirit.' While at the 
table of the Lord I did not feel a rapturous, but yet, 
I trust, a solid joy in the God of my salvation, 
founded only on the atoning blood and perfect right- 
eousness of my Redeemer. The subject on which 

Mr F addressed us, was 'God my exceeding 

joy ;' and many sweet things he said on this. What 
shall thy worthless but highly-favoured servant say 
more, O Lord my God ? O thou King of glory, 
open the doors of my heart and come in ! Come in, 
thou blessed of the Lord ! why standest thou with- 
out ? Let me feel more habitually thy presence, 
and be more than ever devoted to thy service. How 
can I repay thee for thy immeasurable love ? I will 
give thee what thou askest ; vile as it is, I will give 
thee my heart. Lord Jesus, into thy hands I com- 
mend my spirit. But stop, my soul ; recollect thou 
art not repaying in so doing. O Lord, I am both 
soul and body due to thee, for thou hast redeemed 



REV. JOHN HENRY GARDNER. 



41 



me, O Lord God of truth. Let the sight of him 
whom I have pierced sharpen my convictions of sin, 
and rouse my hatred of it. "Why so much opposition 
in my heart to the King of Glory coming in ? Is it 
not on account of my indwelling corruption, my 
earthly-mindedness, my pride, my self-righteousness, 
my host of abominations ? Notwithstanding all my 
sin, I will confidently say, f He loved me, and gave 
himself for me, the chief of sinners. To free grace I 
owe all hitherto ; to free grace let me still be in- 
debted for all I need 5 let me be eternally a debtor to 
the riches of Emmanuel's grace. Amen, and Amen," 
— " July 16. I spent some time in thinking of my 
Redeemer, and my evidences that I am united to 
him. That mark of grace I found still to be strongest, 
namely, that I see the need of his perfect righteous- 
ness. But ah ! how little, after all, do I love him ? 
How little am I ashamed of my sins ? Let me have 
nothing to do with Socinian and Arminian schemes. 
The doctrines of free grace are the only doctrines 
that suit a sinner like me." — " July 18. I went to 
Camhusnethan. Mr Scott preached from these words 3 
' Behold the man whose name is the Branch,' Zech. 
vi. 12. I was not in an ecstacy of joy at the Lord's 
table, but felt a calm and steady reliance on the 
righteousness, and love, and strength of the Re- 
deemer." 

* August 7, Saturday.— I have been endeavouring 
to examine into my state and character with re- 
gard to the important concerns of eternity. What 
a bad judge a person makes of his oavii heart, 
unless when remarkably under the influence of 



4fl 



LIFE AND DIARY OF THE 



Divine grace ! I am inclined to be very superficial, 
yet I cannot say that I am generally ready to judge 
too favourably. I find upon inquiry that I see 
something of my need of a Saviour, and the pre- 
ciousness of Jesus the Son of God. I delight in calling 
God my Father, and my own God in Christ ; and I 
seem to have some knowledge, though it is very small 
indeed, of the evil of sin as opposed to the holiness 
of the Divine character. Why, oh why, am I so 
little affected with this ? Spirit of grace, exert thy 
quickening and purifying influence in this wicked 
heart of mine. As for progress in holiness, upon the 
whole I am led to believe that I am making some 
advances, however slow, in delighting to speak the 
praises of redeeming love, in affectionate regard for 
the souls of men, in desires after clear and practical 
views of Divine things, and in devotedness to the 
Saviour s cause. On this head, I trust, I am not 
mistaken. If I am, it will be a fatal mistake. Let 
me always say, ' by the grace of God I am what I 
am.' I was reading in the 71st Psalm, 6 1 will go 
in the strength of the Lord God, making mention of 
thy righteousness, even of thine only/ I desire to 
adopt these words as my own now when I have 
another opportunity to-morrow, if the Lord will, of 
encompassing his holy altar with his people. Let 
my hps greatly rejoice when I sing unto thee, and 
my soul which thou hast redeemed^ verse 23d." 
— " August 8. Went to Mr Morrison's sacrament. 
Satan, I think, has been making a desperate effort 
to secure me for himself. But, blessed Captain of 
salvation, in spite of all his malice and craftiness — 



REV. JOHN HENRY GARDNER. 



43 



in spite of the assistance he receives from my inward 
and strong corruptions — thou wilt rescue me from 
his hand — thou wilt take me as the spoil from the 
mighty. In great mercy the Lord Jesus conde- 
scended, I think, to manifest himself to me, in some 
measure, at his table. I wish to be particularly 
thankful that he has made me sensible I did not 
deserve this, for so wandering from him who is the 
good Shepherd." 

u Nov. 6, Saturday. The Lord's Supper is to 
be at West Colder. Perhaps I may have an 
opportunity of once more celebrating my Redeemer's 
death. I have been too careless this week in pre- 
paring for it, but I cannot think of refraining from 
the Lord's table. I am encouraged by having read, 
in the first chapter of Philippians, that he who hath 
begun a good work in me will carry it on to the day 
of the Lord Jesus Christ. That work is still very 
imperceptible in my soul • but, if I am not fearfully 
deceived, it is begun, and I commend my soul to the 
care of my dear Saviour, that it may be numbered 
among those ransomed and cleansed in his blood." 
— " Nov. 7, Sabbath. I went to West Calder. Mr 
Fleming preached from Heb. xiii. 20, ' Through 
the blood of the everlasting covenant,' a truly excel- 
lent sermon. I think I met with my Lord at his 
holy table ; I felt that my obligations to be the 
Lord's, and his only, were renewed and strengthened. 
Let me only get grace from his fulness in proportion 
to the opportunities I have of receiving it, and then 
I shall be a happy man and a holy man." 

" Dec. 4, Saturday. — I have been trying to admire 



44 



LIFE AND DIARY OF THE 



the Redeemer's excellence, and to sigh after some- 
thing like sincere and ardent love to him, my unseen 
Saviour. When I think of the greatness and love- 
liness of his character, and of his infinite grace to 
perishing sinners, and especially to perishing me, I 
cannot but feel some faint approaches to supreme 
affection. But ah ! Why do I not burn with love 
to Him who bled to death for me, to save me from 
everlasting burnings, and to bring me to endless life 
and joy ? To thee, to thee will I come, for thou hast 
all fulness, even the residue of the Spirit. Send gra- 
ciously the Comforter to shed abroad thy love in my 
heart. Lord, I hope and cry for thy presence to- 
morrow, in the solemn and interesting service to which 
thy providence calls thy people. Let not the prayers 
of thy people be disregarded. Let not thy faithful- 
ness fail ; but do thou bless the provision of Zion ; 
Clothe thy priests with salvation, and cause thy saints 
to shout aloud for joy. O, that we may see the 
King in his beauty, and that our hearts may be 
ravished with his love ! Lord, restrain my enemies. 
Let my sin, neither at this or any other time, have 
dominion over me. Am I not thine, and bought with 
thy precious blood ? What then have I to do with the 
service of Satan, thine enemy ? Oh, leave me not to 
the will of mine enemies, for I flee for refuge to thine 
everlasting arms!" — " Dec. 5. Mr Brown preached 
the action sermon from John iii. 35, ' The Father 
loveth the Son, and hath given all things into his 
hand.' He dwelt much on that truth, which is indeed 
the essence of all his sermons, that the promises are 
yea and amen in Christ. My mind, during tins dis- 



REV. JOHN HENRY GARDNER. 



41 



course, was not in an entirely careless state, but far 
from being so affected as it ought to have been. Mr 
Horn fenced the tables, and on a repetition of self- 
examination, which I hope was impartial, though 
alas ! not nearly searching enough, I was led to be- 
lieve, and with gratitude, that I was invited by the 
Redeemer to his table. I went to the second table, 
which was served by Mr Horn, who spoke of Christ's 
dying for our sins. I bless the Lord that he gave me 
a sight of his blessed countenance, and a taste of his 
sweet and marvellous grace. I think I felt the love 
of the Redeemer constraining me to give myself anew 
to him for pardoning mercy, and renewing and sancti- 
fying grace. I think I felt, in some faint degree, 
from a sight of my suffering Saviour, the enormous 
evil of sin. Oh, to feel doubly engaged to the service 
of the great Emmanuel, who loved me, and gave him- 
self 'for me. I trust I have received out of his ful- 
ness grace to strengthen me for the duties he pre- 
scribes, and any affliction he may be pleased to send 
on me. I would also now look forward with joy and 
hope to the second and glorious appearing of my great 
God and Saviour, of which it is intended the Lord's 
Supper should put us in remembrance." Alluding 
to this solemnity in a letter to his mother, he says : 
— " The Lord's Supper was dispensed here on Sab- 
bath ; and if showers of blessings have come down in 
proportion to the precious truths we heard, and the 
outward mercies we received, there will be much rea- 
son for reckoning last Sabbath among the days of 
heaven." 

u July 3, Sabbath, 1825. — Mr Brown's action text 



46 



LIFE AND DIARY OF THE 



was 2 Cor. ix. 15, ' Thanks be to God for his un- 
speakable gift.' On the gift of the Lord Jesus to 
sinners, is rny hope and my confidence fixed. Oh, I 
often wonder I was not excluded by very name from 
a right to receive the Lord Jesus ! I was considerably 
affected in communicating ; and, so far as I have 
been enabled to judge, I think my joy was something 
better than that of the hypocrite, which is only the 
crackling of thorns beneath a pot. The ground on 
which I think so is chiefly this — that I know dis- 
tinctly what is the cause of my joy. It is that I, 
as a sinner, have received the promise of eternal 
life through a crucified Saviour ; including in this 
term eternal life all the freedom from guilt — all the 
abundance of favour — all the wisdom and sanctifica- 
tion — all the happiness, and all the glory, which the 
Gospel represents as the purchase of my Redeemer's 
blood, and the freely bestowed gifts of unspeakable 
love. Mr Brown of Inverkeithing preached an ex- 
cellent discourse in the evening, at the tent, to a large 
and attentive assembly, from Psalm lxxii. 16, 'I 
will go in the strength of the Lord God.' The fol- 
lowing is the method he followed : — I. The meaning 
of the resolution, ' I will go,' &c. It means, I will 
persevere, 1st, in believing expectation ; 2d, in devo- 
tional duty ; 3d, in moral duty ; 4th, in mortifying 
corruption ; 5th, in bearing affliction. II. Reasons 
why we should form a resolution of this kind : — 
1st, the greatness of Divine power makes it practi- 
cable ; 2d, his promise makes it warrantable ; 3d, 
the relation in which the saints stand to God ren - 
ders it suitable ; 4th, the comfort enjoyed renders it 



REV. JOHN HENRY GARDNER, 



47 



advantageous ; 5th, the command of God renders it 
binding." 

f ' August 14.— Accompanied — — to Bathgate, 
where the Lord's Supper w as dispensed in Mr Mor- 
rison's congregation. I was, as has been very often 
the case with me at sacramental solemnities, in a cool 
state of mind ; that is to say, not very elevated, yet 
resting with some little degree of calm reliance on 
the righteousness and strength of the Redeemer. I 
have been trying to crucify my sins, especially sloth. 
let this and all my corruptions be nailed to the 
cross. On the way home we conversed on the ser- 
mons we had heard, especially Mr Duncan's,* which 
we all thought peculiarly intelligent and excellent." 

" October 23, Sabbath. — I rose this morning with 
thoughts most completely turned away from spiritual 
objects. It pleased the Father of mercies, however, 
in a considerable degree to alter the current of my 
thoughts, through means of the reading of the Scrip- 
tures and prayer ; accompanied, I trust, by the effec- 
tual operation of the Divine Spirit. On the way to 
the church, I endeavoured to bring my mind into the 
state most favourable to a pleasant and advantageous 
approach to the communion table. I recollected what 
Mr Brown had recommended to us more than once 
— that it well becomes us, having lately had so many 
warnings of our mortality in the death of others, to 
observe this ordinance as dying men. I tried, in the 
strength of grace, to suppose myself on the brink of 
eternity ; and, in this situation, to ask myself on what 
shall I hang my everlasting welfare. I felt that no- 
* The Rev. Professor Duncan, Mid-Calder. 



48 



LIFE AND DIARY OF THE 



thing could safely support it but the finished work of 
the glorious Emmanuel ; and on him, with the most 
implicit confidence, I see I might trust. In these 
meditations I enjoyed more joy and peace in believ- 
ing, than I had done for a long time before. I was 
not equally well during the whole of the day. At 
the table of the Lord I experienced some meltings 
of heart in contemplating the loye of the Son of God, 
who loved us as the Father loved him. What shall 
I render to the Lord Jesus for his generous, bound- 
less love ? Let me love him who first loved me. 
How cold, how worthless, the return I make for the 
love which passeth knowledge ! Mr Brown's action 
sermon was from Psalm lxxxv. 8, e I will hear what 
God the Lord will speak; he will speak peace to 
his people, and to his saints/ Blessed be the God 
of peace, who has devised a plan for making peace 
with his enemies." 

" June 4, 1826, Sabbath morning. — I go an igno- 
rant, heartless, unholy creature ; in infinite mercy go 
with me, O thou who hast loved me ! I go empty 
and hungry ; O bring me to thy fulness, to the fat- 
ness of thy house, and of thy holy place ! Be thou 
exalted, O dear Saviour, and thy glory, over all the 
earth ! Let many a ransomed soul burn with ardent 
love to thee this day ; let many a heart beat high at 
the contemplation of thy matchless, excellent, and in- 
comparable love. let us see thy face, let us heal- 
thy voice ; for sweet is thy voice, and thy countenance 
is comely ! Thy banner over us be love. — Evening. 
I will love the Lord ; for he has heard my prayer, and 
has dealt bountifully with me. I have indeed been 



REV. JOHN HENRY GARDNER. 



49 



rather in an empty sort of frame to-day, and on the 
whole have had little impression of the presence of 
God, and the reality of the truths I have heard, and 
the solemnity of the exercises I was engaged in. Yet 
let me beware of complaining that I have not expe- 
rienced all the comfort and edification from this day's 
service that I could have wished. Must He not do 
with his own as he pleases ; and especially shall 
I not submit to Him, who will cause all things to 
work together for my good ? At the table I tried to 
remember Jesus ; and this simple remembrance of him, 
as my Saviour and God, gave me a peace that passes 
understanding. The object of Mr Fleming's discourse 
was to prove the divinity of the Redeemer — a point 
of the very last moment. He who died for me is 
the same who created the heavens and the earth, who 
upholds them by the word of his power, and regulates 
all their movements and minutest changes. This 
God shall be my God for ever and ever. Amen. 
Halleluia." 

" July 2, Sabbath. — Mr Brown's text was Gal. ii. 
20, f Who loved me, and gave himself for me.' Mr 
Ebenezer preached the evening sermon from Rom. 
viii. 34, ' Who is he that condemneth ? It is Christ 
that died.' What ! Is it growing in grace and in the 
knowledge of our Lord Jesus Christ, to become more 
and more lukewarm ? Last year, on a similar occa- 
sion, my graces were more vigorously exercised than 
they were to-day. To-day, though I could some- 
times attend tolerably to what was said, I wanted 
reality in my contemplation of the truth. It is here 
my difficulty almost always lies. Yet I did not cry 

c 



50 



LIFE AND DIARY OF THE 



earnestly for the Spirit of Christ to enlighten and 
quicken me. What sweet remembrance I had, how- 
ever, of Him who loved me and gave himself for me, 
will, I hope, prove, in some measure, fatal to my 
lustsi, and nourishing to my graces. When reflecting 
on my barrenness and want of progress in the Divine 
life, how shall I get relief? I must just come anew 
to the fulness of my God and Saviour. O my Lord 
and my God ! I am nothing and less than nothing, but 
thou art all and in all. It rejoices me to thinks that, 
though many who have been seeking the Lord 
Jesus may have been, for wise and holy reasons, left 
in darkness this day, there are most certainly a great 
many who have been inflamed with new and more 
ardent love to the Lamb of God. If there were any 
of the exercises I joined in with earnestness, it was 
in singing, Worthy the Lamb." 

From the tenor of the memoranda just quoted, it 
is clear that the intensity of his religious feelings did 
not preclude the exercise of a calm and discriminating 
judgment. The following extract of a letter to a 
friend, may serve still further to evince his care to 
blend rational and deliberate inquiry with warm de- 
votional feeling :* — u It has often occurred to me 
that, probably, much of that coldness of affection we 
feel, while at the Lord's table, arises from our endea- 
vouring to force ourselves into a considerable degree 
of ardour of feeling. I am persuaded it would be a 
more likely way to make the ordinance useful to us, 
and, indeed, to give us that degree of ardent feeling 
which we desire, to endeavour to bring our minds as 
calmly and sedately as possible to the contemplation 



REV. JOHN HENRY GARDNER. 



51 



of the memorials of our Redeemer's death, and of the 
great truths connected with it. This will, under the 
influence of Him without whom all will be useless, 
produce a serious vivid conception of those objects 
that ought to give occasion to our feelings. But we 
are too apt to make a violent effort to reach our end, 
without deliberately applying the means which are to 
effect it." 

Few have been more alive than was the subject 
of this narrative to the pleasures and advantages of 
religious conversation, and the free communication of 
sentiment among the friends of the Redeemer. His 
journal includes numerous allusions to the comfort 
he felt in conference of this description with indivi- 
duals he met with on various occasions, and in par- 
ticular on the Lord's day, or during the time of a 
communion. He mentions, for example, the happi- 
ness he enjoyed in the spiritual talk of the ministers 
at Mr Brown's house, on the Monday after the ad- 
ministration of the Lord's Supper, in summer 1825, 
when a variety of interesting anecdotes were told. 
After introducing the name of a certain excellent in- 
dividual who belonged to the party, he adds : " More 
than once in his prayers, in his sermons, and in his 
conversation in the house, he took notice of the 
young generation of ministers who are rising to fill 
the places of him and his brethren. Who would not 
love such a follower of the Lamb ? " He refers again 
to a " pleasant, though short interview," he had at 
Foldhouse in July 1826, with two young friends, one 
of whom was the Rev. John Simpson, now a mis- 



52 



LIFE AND DIARY OF THE 



sionary in Jamaica. A person who knew him well, 
alludes to this feature of his character in the follow- 
ing terms, in a letter addressed to his sister subse- 
quently to his death : — " I can never forget the im- 
pression his entire devotedness to the cause of Jesus 
made upon me soon after he came amongst us. Well 
do I remember the lively and active, yet modest part 
he was ever ready to take in religious conversation,, 
and the delight it seemed to afford him. It was 
never owing to him, if the conversation was not edi- 
fying and useful. Indeed, his whole walk and con- 
versation was such as was calculated to produce a 
salutary influence on all who enjoyed his friendship." 

In one of his letters to a relative, he expresses his 
deep regret, with regard to the professed Christians 
of a certain district, that K though there seem to be 
many really serious people among them, there is so 
extremely little intercourse betwixt them on the sub- 
ject of experimental religion. I know not almost one 
who could say of another, ' Such a man has had to 
fight his way through darkness and despondency, but 
has now attained to peace and joy in believing/ I 
do not mean that we should, in a formal way, ac- 
quaint one another of the minutest thoughts and feel- 
ings of our minds, (although this, if deemed proper, 
might be very useful,) but that such an opening on 
the subject of practical godliness ought to exist among 
us, that we would feel no sort of restraint in commu- 
nicating our spiritual joys to each other, or request- 
ing one another's sympathy, advice, and prayers, in 
situations of darkness or sorrow. In humbly throw- 
ing out these hints, I wish to speak as the person who 



REV. JOHN HENRY GARDNER. 



53 



might expect to receive most and confer least advan- 
tage, were the object to be gained." 

While his mind was thus deeply impressed with 
the utility of religious and confidential intercourse 
among Christians, we do not wonder to find him re- 
peatedly expressing the happiness he experienced in 
uniting with the pious, not excepting the most illi- 
terate among them, in the usual exercises of praying 
societies. — " July 15, 1824. Attended the prayer- 
meeting at Blackfauld. How like a little heaven 
below is it, thus to unite with a few apparently seri- 
ous people in devotion, and in religious conversation ! " 
— " Dec. 3, Friday. I attended the fellowship-meeting 
at Blackfauld. There were nine present. The ex- 
ercises this evening, (being the Friday before the 
celebration of the Lord's Supper,) consisted wholly in 
singing and prayer, in which all of us engaged. Far 
from engaging so spiritually as I ought to do in these 
holy exercises, I rejoice in the free grace of God, 
which has enabled me, who formerly reckoned all 
such employments an intolerable burden, now to re- 
gard them with some degree of pleasure. Most of 
the honest men prayed very fervently ; and may the 
God of all grace, the Hearer of prayer, lend a gracious 
ear to our supplications, and give us an answer in 
showers of blessing, for the sake of his Beloved ! " — 
" Nov. 24, 1825. Attended the fellowship-meeting 
at Benthead. We had some very interesting ques- 
tions about the tree of life, that bears twelve manner 
of fruits ; and the north and south winds, for which 
the spouse in the Song of Solomon prays." 



54 



LIFE AND DIARY OF THE 



Amidst the appearances of piety in his speech and 
deportment, the discipline of the heart was by no 
means neglected. His most secret thoughts., feelings, 
and motives, as well as words and deeds, were often 
subjected to the ordeal of a rigid scrutiny • and he 
not only confessed, with heart-felt contrition, what- 
ever his conscience condemned as sinful, but humbly 
resolved to avoid its repetition, and to mortify the 
principle of depravity in its most latent and insinu- 
ating forms. That this statement is correct, appears 
from his private exercises in reference to the Lord's 
Supper, adverted to above, and might be confirmed 
by numerous additional memoranda, of which the 
following are specimens : — 

" Aug. 13, 1824. — Too long of rising, which is 
too common a fault with me. Let me endeavour, in 
the strength of grace, to resist my natural inclination 
to sloth. We must not be slothful in business, but 
fervent in spirit ; and why ? that we may serve the 
Lord." 

u Jan. 7, 1825. — O that I could acknowledge the 
finger of God, the finger of my own God and Father, 
in this slight affliction. Surely he means it for my 
good. Why then so peevish and downcast ? ' Re- 
turn unto thy rest, O my soul ! the Lord hath indeed 
dealt bountifully with thee.'" — " Feb. 25. I have to 
look back with regret on my silence in the cause of 
my Redeemer. Why is not my speech always sea- 
soned with salt ? Why does it not always savour of 
that name which is as ointment poured forth ? " 

"Jan. 15, Sabbath, 1826. — How scattered and 
trifling have been my thoughts on this holy day ! It 



REV. JOHN HENRY GARDNER. 



55 



requires an effort to fix them on him who ought to 
be the constant subject of them. Injured Jesus, 
when shall my sinning cease ? When shall I no 
longer forget thee a moment ? Hasten, hasten, in 
thy time, the blessed day." — " Jan. 22, Sabbath. 
I did not go to rest last night, impressed, as I 
ought to have been, with the thoughts of eternity, 
and consequently arose on this hallowed morning 
with but very scattered ideas and very wavering 
attention. Mr Brown improved the numerous deaths 
that have taken place of late, by discoursing from 
these words: c O that they were wise, that they 
understood this, that they would consider their latter 
end !' It is a strange, though a true fact, that eter- 
nity, with all its vastness of importance, occupies but 
a very small portion of our thoughts, and takes such 
a slight hold of our attention that the merest trifle is 
sufficient to drive it from our minds. Did I speak 
in the singular number, and relate my own experience, 
I might use language still stronger. Eternity — 
wonder heavens, and be astonished earth ! — 
makes almost no impression on this callous spirit of 
mine. I cannot realize in my mind the overwhelm- 
ing idea of an infinite duration ; and it is with the 
utmost difficulty that I can be persuaded that eternity 
is of any importance at all. "Were my mind left to 
its own workings, what a wilderness, or rather what 
a chaos, would it be ? But blessed be the God of 
all grace, the promiser of a heart of flesh, who has, 
I trust, in some degree given me such a heart. I 
feel my hope to be fixed on a sure foundation, the 
Rock of Ages. Upon what condition, O my soul, 



56 



LIFE AND DIARY OF THE 



wouldst thou renounce thy hope in the Redeemer ? 
Not for myriads of worlds." — "Feb. 24." [After 
alluding to a dispute he had somewhat keenly main- 
tained on a certain theological question, he thus 
accuses himself of precipitance and forwardness :] — 
" I know not what to think of this new instance of 
want of vigilance over my tongue, which so often 
proves itself an unruly member, and standing in need 
of constant watchfulness- It is quite plain,, at any 
rate, that in whatever my sin lay in Tuesday even- 
ing s conversation, there was sin and much sin in it. 
I have been wandering away from the character of 
him who is meek and lowly in heart." In a subse- 
quent entry he says,, " I have been examining my 
own heart. The dearest friends I have do not know 
its wickedness. O that I were purged with hyssop, 
and made clean! Every time I thus survey my own 
character, I seem as if I must needs begin again with 
' the first principles of the oracles of God as if 
there were something radically deficient, which must 
be supplied before I can move one step in the Chris- 
tian course. What then is it I want ? I think it is 
a hearty devotedness to God. To deficiency in this 
I can trace all my worldly-mindedness, all my pride, 
all my indolence, all my wickedness. Oh, were I 
but habitually kept under the impression that I am 
not my own, how much more heavenly would my 
affections become — how much more humble would 
I be— how much more active — how much more 
holy, than in the present state of my soul ? But 
what avail my tears ? Will they wipe away my guilt? 
Will they purify my heart ? Will they wash my robes 



REV. JOHN HENRY GARDNER. 



57 



and make them white ? Let me look for cleansing 
to the name of the Lord Jesus, and the Spirit of 
my God!' 

The spirituality of his mind is indicated by the 
following reflection : — " Dec. 26, 1825. I was at 
Longridge in the evening. The sky was very 
serene, and the moon shining very beautifully. The 
pleasing but transient nature of the light of the 
moon, called to my mind the uncertainty of the con- 
tinuance of the most peaceful state of mind that one 
can enjoy on earth, and made me, I trust, long in 
good earnest for the happy land where the sun shall 
never go down — where the embittering thought of 
interruption or end, shall never chasten the joys of 
the blessed inhabitants." 

The return of his birthday generally found him 
prepared to engage in grateful and penitential recol- 
lections of the past, and in serious anticipations of 
the future. — (i Glasgow, Sept. 16, 1824. I am now in 
my eighteenth year, and it were of little consequence 
that my years pass on so rapidly, were they improved 
as they fly. How little wiser, and how very little 
better, since I entered my seventeenth year ? I 
desire humbly to acknowledge the hand of my hea- 
venly Father, who has protected me since that time, 
and has led me in ways of pleasantness. Young as 
I am, I must look on myself as approaching eternity, 
and not only as coming nearer to it than I once was, 
but actually on the borders of it. I now commend 
myself, my studies, my friends, and every thing in 
which I am interested, to the protection and care of 
the Father of mercies, to whom, in Jesus Christ, be 

c2 



58 



LIFE AND DIARY OF THE 



glory for ever. Amen. If it shall please God to 
spare me yet another year, I think my earnest wish 
is, that it may be distinguished for nearer approaches 
to the image of the Redeemer, for more refreshing- 
draughts of the water of life, for active exertions in 
the cause of Emmanuel, for more persevering and 
determined resistance to Satan and my own heart, 
and for increasing preparation for the city that hath 
foundations. But without thee I can do nothing." — 
^Glasgow, Sept. 11, Sabbath, 1825. This is my birth- 
day. I am now eighteen years of age. I hope this 
day has not passed without notice being taken of it, 
in some respects proportioned to the gratitude and 
to the self-inquiry it ought to excite. I know I have 
been lamentably deficient in this single day's duties, 
as I have been in every part of my conduct, nay, in 
my most hidden thoughts, from the first opening of 
my mind to the present hour. O that I may lay 
hold anew on the great atonement, and consecrate 
myself anew to him who effected it ! Mr Muter * 
preached both forenoon and afternoon on 5 the Lord 
is at hand.' The occasion of his doing this, was the 
death of a young man of promising talents and piety, 
who attended Mr Muter's weekly class for young 
people. I could not help taking this in connexion 
with the circumstance of its being my birthday, and 
the recent death of my friend James Waterston, as 
an uncommonly loud call to me to watch and be 
ready." 

At the close of December, he did not fail to indulge 
* The Rev. Dr Robert Mxiter, Duke Street, Glasgow. 



REV. JOHN HENRY GARDNER. 



59 



in similar reflections " Dec. 26, 1824. Mr Brown 

lectured Genesis xxviii. 10 — 15, ' Jacob's ladder 
preached from Deut. viii. 2, 4 Thou shalt remember 
all the way which the Lord thy God hath led thee 
these forty years in the wilderness.' I tried while 
coming home in the evening to recollect my mercies, 
and to remember the way that the Lord my God has 
led me these seventeen years in the wilderness. 
This is the last Sabbath of 1824, and it may be the 
last Sabbath of my earthly course. If it be, then I 
confide in my dear Saviour, that the arms, of his love 
shall receive me into glory ; but if I am still to see 
more Sabbaths, and perhaps more years in this wil- 
derness, then to me to live may it be Christ. May 
I live in Christ, and by Christ, and with Christ, and 
for Christ. 

u I ought to have remembered yesterday week, 
that December 18th is the anniversary of my dear 
grandfather's* decease. It is now six years since 
that event, to us so afflicting, took place. He died 
sweetly in the arms of Emmanuel, commending his 
children and his children's children to the God of 
their father." 

" Dec. 31. I was employed in the evening in 
recollecting God's mercies, and my own ingratitude 
and rebellion. I have received innumerable proofs 
of the Divine mercy during the year 1824 ; and the 
most remarkable of these are those which concern 
my soul. I think I am on the whole nearer to God; 
that he has drawn me closer to himself with the cords 

* The Rey. John Fraser, Auchtermuchty. 



60 



LIFE AND DIARY OF THE 



of love. Yet I have not been so habitually mindful 
of the Lord my God as I ought to have been ■ I 
have been often cold and formal in sacred duties ; I 
have not been watchful enough against temptation ; 
I have frequently been no stranger to pride and self- 
conceit, and to vain imaginations ; I have not been 
so active as I should have been in my duties as a 
student and a teacher. All these abominations and 
sins I desire deeply to deplore before the mercy-seat, 
and to plead their pardon through the blood of Christ. 
I also earnestly besought my heavenly Father to 
make me more holy, and more useful, during the 
remaining portion of my life." 

Instances of mortality around him, in particular 
those occurring among persons distinguished for piety 
and usefulness., or numbered among the companions 
of his childhood and youth, made a strong impression 
on his mind, and served much to deepen Ins convic- 
tions of the importance of religion :— 

<e July \, 1824. I endeavoured to remember in my 
prayers that most worthy Christian, Alexander 
Brownlee, who this morning lost his son John, the 
staff of his old age. He died in consequence of a 
stroke which he received from a horse when return- 
ing from Shotts' fair on Tuesday. He bore an excel- 
lent character, and I hope his name is numbered 
among the spirits of just men made perfect. My 
soul, be thou also ready ! " 

"Aug. 9. Young Mr Waugk of London died 
lately; Mr Telford of Buckhaven went to heaven, 
as Mr Brown expressed it, on the 3d of May last ; 



REV. JOHN HENRY GARDNER. 



61 



and Mr Simpson of the Potterrow congregation 
[Edinburgh] in April. Let my highest aim ever 
be, while in this world, to glorify my Father in 
heaven, by carrying about with me the dying of the 
Lord Jesus." 

ci Nov. 22. I attended the funeral of William 
Somerville, a young man a year older than myself, 
who is the first that has died at Foldhouse since I 
came to it. If it please the Lord that I should be 
the next, may my soul not be surprised, but be 
found closely clinging to the everlasting and well- 
ordered covenant, which is all my salvation and all 
my desire ! Blessed Saviour, if thou shouldst hide 
thy face and deny me thy sensible presence, O leave 
me not in reality for a single moment, or I am 
undone for ever ! Thou art my righteousness, my 
strength, my all." 

"Nov. 12, 1825. I read in the Weekly Journal 
this morning that my grandfather s respected neigh- 
bour and friend, Mr Browning,* has gone to the 
possession of his inheritance. I believe he was a 
real Christian, and longing for the rest that remains 
for the people of God. I recollect the reply which 
he made on one occasion to a minister who remarked, 
that probably he had been much more respected than 
he was aware. Said the good man, / wish the love 

of heaven, and for the love of man . He left the 

sentence unfinished, or only finished by a very sig- 
nificant expression of indifference in his countenance." 

* Rev. James Browning, Minister of the Second United Asso- 
ciate Congregation, Auchtermuchty. 



62 



LIFE AND DIARY OF THE 



« March 29, 1826. I C , one of the friends 

of my childhood, is dangerously ill, and no hope is 
entertained that she will recover. I tried to pray for 
her soul and for the rest of the family, and that the 
affecting dispensation may teach me and all my 
young friends to make vigorous preparation for the 
eternal world ; to seek the beginning of holiness, if 
the good work has never been begun in us; and if it 
has, to press on to higher and higher advances in it." 

— "April 21. My mother writes me that I 

C is no better, but gives pleasing evidence of 

piety. This is, indeed, good news." — w June 12. 

I C departed, I trust, to a better world, on 

the 27th April. T S takes notice of this 

in a feeling manner." In a letter to his sister, dated 
June 17> he expresses himself as follows in reference 
to the same interesting female's decease :— " I long 
to hear about it from you. I have often thought of 
her, since I knew she was dangerously ill ; and it is 
with a melancholy feeling that I think I have prayed 
for her, after she had gone to the narrow house. I 
trust that all is, now, well with her. O that we 
could throw off that shameful delicacy that prevents 
us from reminding our young acquaintances of the 
one thing needful. We ought never to miss an 
opportunity of throwing out the slightest hints on 
this subject ; for how often by this means has a soul 
been saved from death ?" 

A letter addressed to his mother, of date Glasgow, 
A ugust 22, 1825, contains a pious notice of the death 
of one of his fellow-students, son of a minister now 
also deceased : — f< Did you hear," says he, <( of the 



REV. JOHN HENRY GARDNER. 



63 



severe loss Mr Boucher has sustained in the death of 
his son George, who was of the same year, as a stu- 
dent, with me, and on whom he depended in his old 
age? He died of consumption. Why has Provi- 
dence spared me ? The reason that would most na- 
turally strike one is, that I might be of some use to 
my dear mother. It would he impossible to prove 
that this is not the reason. But it is perfectly plain, 
how foolish it is to build on any such foundation the 
hope of long life ; for, reasoning in this way, Mr 
Boucher might be justified in repining at his son's 
removal. This he is far from doing. One of the 
first things he said after receiving the sad news (for 
Mr B. was at Airdrie when George died) was, e the 
Lord gave, and the Lord hath taken away : blessed 
be the name of the Lord/ " He mentions this young 
man also in his journal, in the following terms : — 
u July 28. I regret to hear that George Boucher, one 
of my fellow-students, and son of Mr Boucher, Cum- 
bernauld, has gone the way of all the earth. He 
had the rare qualification of a good knowledge of 
Hebrew. I hope he is now in heaven." 

No one feature in the character of John Henry 
Gardner was more strongly marked than his spiritual 
benevolence. From the first day that he became 
deeply impressed with the importance of his own 
immortal interests, he discovered an active and a 
growing concern for the salvation of others. The 
souls of the young, more especially, attracted his ten- 
clerest sympathies, and every opportunity of promo- 
ting their good he stood prepared to improve. Far 



64 



LIFE AND DIARY OP THE 



from undertaking the charge of a school merely for 
purposes connected with his own accommodation or 
emolument, he felt a cordial interest in the welfare 
of his scholars. Actuated by truly Christian mo- 
tives and feelings, he not only exerted himself with 
fidelity to forward their general improvement in the 
elements of learning, but was peculiarly solicitous to 
be happily instrumental in impressing sacred lessons 
on their tender minds, and in saving their souls from 
death. For this purpose, he examined or conversed 
with them daily, and in particular every Saturday, 
on religious topics ; he not only made them repeat, 
or read with attention, interesting portions of Scrip- 
ture, but familiarly expounded the sense, and incul- 
cated the practical uses to be made of them ; he read 
and commented on suitable tracts and pamphlets ; he 
strictly examined them on the meaning of the ques- 
tions they repeated ; he resolved at length to con- 
verse with them in private individually. To all his 
other efforts, he added frequent and earnest prayer, 
both in the presence of the children, and secretly in 
his own apartment j and when he perceived any pro- 
mising appearances of the success of his labours, he 
expressed his joy and gratitude in solemn thanksgiv- 
ings to God, accompanied with importunate suppli- 
cations for a still more abundant and efficacious bless- 
ing. No reader, probably, will consider these state- 
ments overcharged, after having perused the few fol- 
lowing memoranda, selected from a great number 
written with his own hand, relative to his labours 
among the children of his school :- - 

" July 3, 1 824 — Felt a good deal of concern for 



REV. JOHN HENRY GARDNER. 



the salvation of my dear pupils. I am afraid I am 
scarcely aware of the responsibility that attaches to 
the charge of forty lambs of Christ's flock. great 
Shepherd of the sheep,, give me grace, I beseech thee, 
to feed these kids by the shepherd's tents ! but espe- 
cially do thou gather in thine arms., and carry them 
in thy bosom." — ci July 30. Tried now and then to 
say something serious to my scholars. But how often 
do I forget that they are immortals, and that I am 
accountable ? Lord,, bring these dear young ones 
to Jesus. my blessed Saviour, be thou the Saviour 
of my dear pupils ; these lambs of thy flock thou 
hast committed to the care of thy weak and unwor- 
thy servant." — u July 31. Spoke with considerable 
freedom to the children on the 1st chapter of 1st Pe- 
ter, from which the questions for this day were taken, 
When praying for them, I think I am enabled to cast 
them entirely on the Lord ; considering that I can 
neither, of myself, perform my duty aright to them, 
nor make what I say effectual to their everlasting 
benefit. But I rejoice that with my Redeemer is the 
residue of the Spirit ; and that he has promised to 
gather the lambs in his arms, and carry them in his 
bosom."—" Aug. 3. Read to my scholars part of 
Emily Geddies' life, from The Young Christian. 
O Lord, forbid that if any of these children should 
perish, their blood should be on my head! Make 
me diligent, and faithful, and humble, in the dis- 
charge of duty, and deny me not thy grace." — 
" Aug. 7- Read with my scholars 1st John i., from 
which I took occasion to tell them of the holiness of 
God's character, and the necessity of our conformity 



66 LIFE AND DIARY OF THE 

to it, of the pardoning virtue of Jesus' bloody &c. 
Many of them, I think, pay serious attention." — 
" Aug. 14. Examined my scholars on the 1st chapter 
of Revelation. Let me consign to the care of the 
Lord Jesus himself, and his Father and Spirit, the 
little ones under my charge. When speaking of the 
second coming of Christ, some of them really ap- 
peared seriously considerate, than which nothing can 
more gratify me. I would not value all the riches, 
or even all the learning, of the world, half so much 
as one soul saved through my instrumentality ; even 
though lately weaned from the milk and drawn from 
the breasts." — " Aug. 18. My school was examined. 
There were present of the trustees, Messrs Brown 
and Mitchell, Croft head, Leadloch, Braehead, and 
William Russell. The scholars did very well. Mi- 
Mitchell exhorted them. We sung the hymn, 6 Ho- 
sanna to the royal Son/' &c— " Aug. 20. Read Poor- 
Joseph to the scholars. that each of these dear 
children may be enabled to apply to the only Sa- 
viour !" — u Nov. 19. This week I have enjoyed very 
sensibly the presence of my Redeemer. I have been 
reading Brown's Young Christian to the scholars, 
who appeal', on the whole, to be pretty attentive. 
May the Spirit of God fix their hearts."—" Nov. 20. 
Examined the scholars on the 103d Psalm, and en- 
deavoured to direct their minds to the mercies of 
Providence and grace. They answered the questions 
pretty well."—" Dec. 25. I caused my scholars read 
the 11th of Matthew, and repeat the three last 
verses. Some of them seemed to give the most ear- 
nest heed. I thank my God for every instance of 



REV. JOHN HENRY GARDNER. 



67 



this, and pray that they may be effectually brought 
out of darkness into his marvellous light." 

ff Jan. 8, 1825.— My scholars read Eccles. xii., 
and answered some questions on it very well. They 
were in general quiet and attentive throughout." — 

" Nov. 17- I detained T- — - M to-day, that I 

might have an opportunity of talking to him alone. 
I asked him if ever he read the Bible at home ; he 
said he did. I asked him if he prayed ; he made no 
answer, and I took it for granted he had never been 
taught to address the throne of grace. Oh ! what 
gratitude do I owe for a Christian education, how- 
ever misimproved. I said to him the substance of 

what I had said to T R . I asked him if 

he would now endeavour to pray; he said, Yes. So 
I entreated him, to seek the grace of Christ, to make 
him pray from the heart. I asked him, in sending 
him away, if he would endeavour to keep in mind 
and think seriously of what I had told him ; he again 
replied in the affirmative. I am convinced I have 
overlooked a great means of benefiting the souls of 
the children, by never taking them by themselves in 
this way. I am resolved, therefore, as God's grace 
shall enable me, to avail myself henceforth, while I 
continue among them, of this very likely method of 
imprinting the truth on their tender minds. It will, 
besides the probability that it may be blessed to the 
salvation of some of the children, prepare me for the 
still more interesting and more responsible duties of 

the ministry."— cl Nov. 19. I kept little M 

T to-day after the rest of the scholars were out, 

because I thought she seemed deeply interested while 



68 



LIFE AND DIARY OF THE 



! 



I was proposing questions about the way of reconci- 
liation with God. She could tell me, on my inqui- 
ring, that she prayed morning and evening ; that she 
read the Testament ; that she did not learn a prayer 
and say it, but just asked what she needed. I asked 
her if she wished to love Jesus ? she replied with 
some eagerness, Yes. I asked, too, if she would like 
to hear about him from me now and then, when I 
had time to speak to her alone ; to this she also 
replied in the affirmative. This little girl has been 
very well brought up ; and she now resides with her 
grandfather, who, she tells me, says a great many 
good things to her on the Sabbath night. I know 
him to be a friend to the Saviour, though a doubting 
and fearing one. What I liked most in the child 
was, that though not inclined to speak much to me, 
she had always the answer quite at hand. When I 
put the question, How did Jesus save us ; or what 
has Jesus done for us ? She more than once replied, 
with seeming ardour, He died for us." 

" Feb. 24, 1826.— On Thursday I began to cate- 
chise the children more minutely than formerly, on 
Brown's Questions. Since the vacation I have exa- 
mined at least one class in the morning on that 
catechism. But as I have become more than ever 
convinced of the necessity of such exercises, since 
reading The End and Essence, and at the same time 
having got some new ideas on the subject, I have 
resolved to extend the advantage of them, as far as 
possible, to all the children who repeat Brown's 
Catechism. In the mean time, I prescribe only five 
or six questions each day, that they may be thoroughly 



REV. JOHN HENRY GARDNER. 



69 



understood before they are passed over.''" On this 
topic he gave the following information to a relative, 
in a letter bearing date April 22, 1826 :— " I have 
found the good effects both here and in my Sabbath 
school of the catechising system. I endeavour, 
through means of questions, to fix the meaning of 
every thing in the children's minds, and I have cause 
to be very grateful for the success which has attended 
these attempts. They are beyond what I expected. 
Many of the children answer questions on a religious 
subject with great readiness, and as if they were 
interested in what they say. My hope is, that He 
who willeth not that any of these little ones should 
perish, will give testimony by his Spirit to the word 
of his grace." 

The partings that took place betwixt the teacher 
and his pupils, immediately before the autumn vaca- 
tion, were marked, on both sides, by expressions of 
tender affection. Let one example suffice :— ci Aug. 
20, 1825. I read to the scholars a short address I 
had written for the Longridge scholars to-morrow 
evening. Read also the Apostle Paul's farewell 
address to the elders of Ephesus, and showed the 
children in what points the circumstances of Paul and 
the Ephesians correspond with our own. Many of 
them were much affected ; but whether savingly 
impressed or not, is only known to the Searcher of 
hearts. Lord, into thy hands I commit them ! Keep 
them from every snare, and from every evil way. 
And, if it be thy will, restore me in due time to my 
labours among these dear children." 

In addition to the labours of his day-school at 



70 



LIFE AND DIARY OF THE 



Foldhouse, he cheerfully assisted Mr Brown in 
teaching the young people at Longridge on Sao hath ; 
to which he alludes in the last two extracts. Let us 
hear from himself a few particulars relative to these 
pious attempts. In a letter to an uncle, under date 
Jan. 9, 1826, after adverting to the state of his 
day-school, he thus continues : " My Sahhath-school 
is pretty well attended this winter. Thus has it 
pleased God to lay me under prodigious responsi- 
bility, with respect to the souls of these dear child- 
ren — responsibility that might make me shrink from 
my duties as a teacher, were it not that he has 
also promised to make his strength perfect in weak- 
ness. I wish to remember that though I can entreat, 
I cannot convert my scholars, and to be ready to say, 
if it shall please the Father of mercies to show me 
any fruit of my labours, ' Not unto us, O Lord ; not 
unto us, but unto thy name give glory.' " A letter 
to his mother, mitten only about two months after 
he had taken up his residence at Foldhouse, contains 
the following notice of his teaching on the Lord's day : 
ic On Sabbath, immediately after dinner I mount the 
reading-desk, sing a Psalm, then examine from 
twenty to thirty children on Brown's Catechism, and 
employ the rest of the time till the ringing of the 
bell, in reading some interesting extracts from the 
Gleaner, or any similar publication. After tea, again, 
I have twenty or thirty to teach in the session-house, 
which occupies till near six o'clock. This school 

belongs properly to Mrs B , and she keeps it when 

inconvenient for me." 

A few notices of the Sabbath-schools may also be 



REV. JOHN HENRY GARDNER. 



71 



quoted from his diary : — a Jan. 9, 1825. I taught 
the Sabbath-school to-day with considerable pleasure, 
and with affection to the children. After they had 
repeated some texts relating to the Holy Spirit, I 
said a few plain things as affectionately as I could, 
in order to show the necessity of the blessed Sancti- 
fier, noticing that all had a right to ask and expect 
his gracious influence. May the Spirit of Christ lead 
these dear little ones, that they may appear to all to 
be his!" — " July 10. Taught the Sabbath-school with 
much pleasure, and was enabled to speak to the 
scholars with some degree of affection and earnest- 
ness. But, O blessed Spirit, if any good be done, 
thine must be the glory. On thee I throw these 
dear children, and my ordinary scholars ; for without 
thee we can do nothing."— July 31. The Sabbath 
scholars repeated texts in proof of the doctrine of the 
last judgment ; and when I endeavoured to impress 
on their minds its solemnities, some of them seemed 
much affected. Give them, O Lord, more than mere 
softness of feeling, when such arousing truths are 
addressed to them. May they now love the Lord 
Jesus their friend, and have no reason to be alarmed 
when he appears as their judge." — " Oct. 9. [[After 
an absence of six weeks.] Taught the Sabbath- 
school with much pleasure. The children were appa- 
rently very glad to see me again, and I am sure I was 
at least equally happy in being permitted once more 
to instruct them in the things that belong to their 
eternal peace." — " Nov. 13. The children in the school 
repeated texts about the knowledge of Christ. Exa- 
mining them on what we should know about the 



7-2 



LIFE AXD DIARY OF THE 



Lord Jesus Christ, I was very much pleased with 
their attention, and more than I was before with 
their answers to my questions. I wish, above all, to 
impress on their tender minds the doctrine of the 
atonement. Here my own hopes concentrate, and I 
earnestly desire these dear children may be partakers 
of my joy." — rt Jan. 22, 1826. I was conscious when 
teaching the Sabbath-school, that if I had one wish 
in my soul stronger than another, one of my most 
ardent desires was, that the souls of the children 
might be saved. This I told the dear young immor- 
tals, who seemed, for the time at least, to give earnest 
heed. Immediately after dismissing them, and also 
after returning home, I commended them in prayer 
to Him who not only suffers, but invites such to seek 
him." 

Scarcely any practicable means of advancing the 
spiritual welfare of young people around him was 
left untried. From some hints in his journal, it ap- 
pears that he took an active part in a Juvenile Society 
for assisting in the diffusion of the Gospel, and also 
in a Young Men's Society, in the congregation, for 
prayer and Christian conference. A meeting of the 
latter is thus noticed :— " Dec. 1, 1824. I attended 
the young men's fellowship meeting. The questions 
were on Isaiah xxviii. 9,-2 Tim. ii. 19, — Gal. vi. 1 4. 
I proposed for the next meeting, 2 Tim. i. 10, ' Who 
has abolished death/ I hope that by attending these 
meetings, under the blessing of God, my little stock 
of knowledge may both be increased and laid out to 
the advantage of others." 

The truth is^ that, to his relatives and intimate 



REV. JOHN HENRY GARDNER. 



73 



friends, he often spoke of his exercises for the reli- 
gious instruction of youth, as having been blessed for 
arousing his own mind to a more vivid sense of eter- 
nal things. 

The worthy Mr Brown, with his accustomed hu- 
mility and kindness, did not omit frankly to acknow- 
ledge, both to himself and others, the aid he received 
from this estimable young man, in imparting instruc- 
tion to the lambs of his flock. " I thank you/' says 
he in a letter to him, " for your kind assistance to 
me in the congregation. I hope there will be good 
fruits. You know I love you ; and hope you will 
pray for us all." 

Mr Brown's affection for him was reciprocated with 
equal sincerity. In summer 1825, when he was so- 
licited to undertake the tuition of the children of a 
very respectable family in a different part of the 
country, he resolved to decline the invitation ; and 
in forming this resolution, was chiefly influenced by 
gratitude to this venerable minister, and by the plea- 
sure it gave him to lend his humble aid to his pious 
endeavours for the spiritual good of the young. ec My 
obligations to Mr Brown," he says in his Diary, " and 
the probability that Providence has set me down near 
him, that I might have an opportunity of assisting 
him in his old age, has struck me forcibly." 

The memory of his uncommon zeal for advancing 
the spiritual welfare of the young, seems to be em- 
balmed in the hearts of the pious in that district. At 
the beginning of the year 1835, his sister had a letter 
from Mrs W of C , which contains the fol- 
lowing expressions The memory of your beloved 

D 



74 



LIFE AND DIARY OP THE 



brother is still very dear to many of the people here. 
Several of them have spoken of him to me with the 
deepest interest : they say there never was a teacher 
like him for anxiety and care about the children's 
spiritual concerns." 

The success of Sabbath-schools generally was an 
object he had sincerely at heart ; and he gladly em- 
braced an opportunity, wherever it occurred, of 
addressing young people on the evening of the Lord's 

day. During one of his visits to K , he says 

accordingly : — ci Went to Miss D 's school in the 

evening, and examined the girls on that interesting- 
passage, John iii. 14 — 18. They were very atten- 
tive." — a This day three weeks/' he says again, " I 
addressed the Sabbath-school which I formerly at- 
tended as a scholar, in Auchtermuchty. I felt pecu- 
liarly on the occasion. I was enabled to address the 
dear children in such a manner as seemed to catch 
their attention. The Sabbath after I taught my own 
school at Longridge, and also the morning class of 
young men. I feel grateful for these opportunities of 
showing at least my good- will to the cause of the 
Redeemer, and the best interests of immortal souls. 
With God it remains to bless my feeble exertions." 

Brevity, perspicuity, affection, solemnity, and ear- 
nestness, characterised his addresses to the young ; 
and whatever the ultimate effects may have been, 
they were generally listened to by them with every 
appearance of intense interest, as well as respectful 
attention. 

His earliest companions were not overlooked. He 
kept a benevolent eye on them whilst with himself 



REV. JOHN HENRY GARDNER. 



75 



they were rising to maturity, that he might not only 
remember them in prayer, but, as opportunities oc- 
curred, remind them of the importance of religion, or 
administer counsel and encouragement to any one of 
their number whose mind became alive to the sub- 
ject. After naming several young men whom he had 
known from childhood, and whom he had the happi- 
ness to meet with in September 1825, he adds : f< It 
is very agreeable to see former playmates doing so 
well. I trust they do not forget the one thing need- 
ful — needful for us all, however different the profes- 
sions we have chosen." In the spiritual interests of 
one of these playmates he took a peculiarly heartfelt 
and a lasting concern, from the moment he received 
from him a letter, disclosing the state of his mind re- 
garding the great salvation. " I was afraid," says 
he, a he intended to be witty on the awful subject ; 
but, oh the wonder, the gratitude, that suddenly 
sprung up in my heart, as I read his account of the 
awakening that had taken place in his soul ! He 
states that it was on the last Lord's day of the last 
year, that he was led to see his sinfulness. He en- 
treats me, again and again, to pray frequently for 
him. I have already been trying to do so, and did it, 
I trust, with sincerity and humble reliance on him 
who will not break the bruised reed, nor quench the 
smoking flax. that the impressions made on my 

dear . 's heart may not be a morning cloud, or 

an early dew — that the good work may really begin 
and proceed to perfection ! that I may be the 
unworthy instrument of strengthening his hands in 
the good ways of the Lord ! Perhaps the experience 



76 



LIFE AND DIARY OP THE 



of the chief of sinners may be of some use to en- 
courage and direct him ; and therefore I determine, 
in the strength of grace, to write him as soon as pos- 
sible, and to use every mean that is most likely, un- 
der the blessing of my Lord and Saviour, to promote 
his faith, and hope, and holiness." 

The subject of this memoir considered himself a 
debtor, not merely to the young, but to all of every 
class who had a claim on his brotherly-kindness or 
charity. Sustaining the capacity of a student and a 
teacher within the limits of Mr Brown's congrega- 
tion, he felt his obligation to seek its general prospe- 
rity, and was ready to sympathize with each indivi- 
dual connected with it, as circumstances required. 
This is evident, in some degree, from the following 
memoranda: — " May 30, 3825. This was the day 
fixed for the removal of that most respectable pair, 

A B and his wife, to P s, where they 

are to live with then sons. Heavenly Father, when 
forced by adverse circumstances to leave the place of 
their fathers' sepulchres, and to sojourn among stran- 
gers, let thy presence go with them." — " June 12. 

Felt very much concern for C W , who is 

in a despondent state of mind with respect to her 
salvation. Let me, who once dared to doubt, and 
even yet sometimes practically distrusts the Redeem- 
er's ability to save, sympathize with a person in such 
circumstances, and implore in her behalf the Divine 
mercy. Astonish her, blessed Jesus, with a full dis- 
play of thy grace and truth ; surprise her with thy 
overflowing compassion, and dispel her fears. If 



REV. JOHN HENRY GARDNER. 



77 



such are to be pitied, alas ! what tears of blood should 

be shed for those who, as Mrs B expressed it, 

run carelessly on to hell ?" — " March 10, 1826. On 
Tuesday, the 28th ult., I attended the funeral of my 

intelligent friend, old J C , who died on 

Saturday evening. There is much melancholy plea- 
sure in canying to the grave the dust of one who 
was, to all appearance, a follower of the Lamb." 

Among the sick of the congregation or neighbour- 
hood, whom he was invited to visit, no case seems to 
have interested him more deeply than that of Agnes 
Waddell, who was confined to her bed for the space 
of fully fifteen years ; and during her long confine- 
ment and protracted illness, was enabled to exercise 
a cheerful resignation to the will of God, and ap- 
peared to make great advances in the divine life. We 
quote the following notices of this interesting daugh- 
ter of affliction : — u Aug. 21, 1824. I was much gra- 
tified in going to see Nanny Waddell, who has lain 
many years in her bed." — " Nov. 12. Went to see 
Nanny Waddell. She is deeply afflicted, but very 
resigned. I said she had certainly suffered a great 
deal of pain; she instantly replied, c Our Master 
suffered much more.' She spoke a good deal, and I 
perceived she was exhausted. After praying with 
her for a few minutes, I took farewell of her ; feel- 
ing that at least she ought to be a friend of mine, as 
it was evident she was a friend of Jesus." — " Jan. 5, 
1825. I went to see Nanny Waddell, and read part 
of Ralph Erskine's Memoir to her,* which she said 

* This was probably a short Memoir of the Rev. R. Eiskine, 
< ontaiued in the Rev. Mr Brown's Gospel Truth. 



78 



LIFE AND DIARY OF THE 



refreshed her very much. She entreated me not to 
forget her in my addresses to the throne of mercy, 
because, she said, she was the chief of sinners. I 
spent thirty or forty minutes very happily with her, 
and then set out, followed by her earnest prayer that 
the Lord might be with me on the way. Had some 
pleasing thoughts of my Saviour and his grace, for 
which I cannot be duly grateful." — u March 5. 
Called for Nanny Waddell, who was very glad to see 
me. Read a little to her ; talked and prayed with 
her. She earnestly entreated my supplications at the 
throne of grace, and modestly consented to remember 
me and my scholars. She observed that she was 
poor and worthless • but I added that there was One 
infinitely worthy, through whom we shall always be 
heard. She dwelt with delight on the glories of the 
heavenly world. Indeed, she seems as if she were 
very near it, from her longing so much for it. It 
may please our Heavenly Father, however, who does 
all things well, to detain her for years to come in this 
vale of weeping. that he may continue with her 
the light of his countenance !" — u May 16, Monday. 
Called for Nanny Waddell, to whom I told some of 
Dr Peddie's excellent notes on ' Blessed are the dead 
that die in the Lord,' with which she said she was 
much refreshed." — " April 11. Last evening I went 
to see poor Nanny Waddell, who has been very ill 
since I last visited her. Among other things, I gave 
her the outline of Henry Martyn's life. I asked her 
if she did not, in her greatest distress, find the throne 
of grace accessible ? She replied, ( Oh yes, He can 
hear a sigh V " This good woman, we are told, died 



REV. JOHN HENRY GARDNER. 



79 



about the close of the year 1828, expressing the same 
humble reliance on the Saviour which she had long 
discovered. 

John Henry's glowing zeal for the salvation o-° 
precious souls, induced him to compassionate the 
condition of wandering mendicants ; and sometimes 
when they approached his dwelling, he was at consi- 
derable pains to awaken their consciences and en- 
lighten their minds. Two instances of this Christian 
conduct, in particular, are noticed in his journal. 
The first, with some abridgment, is detailed as fol- 
lows : — " Nov. 14, 1825. Before breakfast, a man 

called whose name is W- M , asking charity. 

He told me he had been a farmer in Ayrshire, but 
with taking a violent fever his affairs went to wreck, 
and he lost the power of his left hand. I sent a note 
with him to Mr Brown, asking him to give him a 
Bible, if he had one ; when he returned, I spent a 
good while talking to him, and though I found his 
ignorance to be very great, the conversation I had 
with him was yet most interesting. He was very 
open both to instruction and reproof. I entreated 
him to study the Bible carefully, and to pray earnestly 
over it. I asked him a great variety of questions, in 
order to set him a-thinking on the fundamental truths 
of the Gospel, as well as to discover what measure of 
knowledge he had. I got him to acknowledge, that 
in however prosperous circumstances we were, it was 
in vain to look for real happiness from this world, 
and then asked him, f Where he thought we should 
look for happiness ? ' He replied, ' We should try to 



80 



LIFE AND DIARY OP THE 



prepare for a better world.' I asked him, ' What do 
you think is the only way to prepare for going into 
another world ?' I shall never forget his answer; it 
was the natural language of the natural mind, that in 
all ages and in all countries breathes a spirit of legal- 
ity. ' I think/ said he, 4 that the best way is to be 
honest, and to do our duty to the best of our know- 
ledge.' There is no doubt that had these words been 
uttered with the same meaning with which the Apostle 
Paul used the following, ' By patient continuance 
in well-doing seek for glory, honour, and immortality/ 
the answer would have been correct in the highest 
degree ; but it was impossible not to see that he 
looked on this doing of duty as the ground of admis- 
sion into the better country ; and this was set beyond 
a question by the ignorance he discovered with re- 
spect to the first essential of religion, faith. I hasten- 
ed, therefore, to explain to him the blessed plan of 
redemption, and I trust I was enabled to speak with 
all plainness of speech. I told him the story of 
Erskine and Freeport, the two boys at school, one of 
whom committed a fault, and the other bore the pun- 
ishment ; and this illustration of the atonement 
pleased him very much. He saw, before I had finish- 
ed the story, how it applied to the case in hand. He 
went away, expressing his gratitude to a degree quite 
immoderate. While parting with him he said he 
would never forget me ; but I entreated him to strive 
more to remember what I had said than to remember 
myself. I exhorted him again to read the Bible, and 
to pray earnestly, both of which he seemed in good 
earnest resolved to do. When he said he might per- 



MEV. JOHN HENRY GARDNER. 



81 



haps come round this way with a pack, I told him I 
might never see him again on earth ; but reminded 
him that we would meet at the judgment-seat of 
Christ, and then both he and I would have to answer 
for the truths I had addressed to him. And now that 
he is gone from my sight, I know not how deep may 
have been the impression made by these plain but 
precious truths. I have commended him by prayer 
to the grace of the Lord Jesus Christ. I have en- 
treated my Saviour to take him for his own, and, 
though I should never be informed of the happy 
change, translate him from darkness to light, and 
bring him from the power of Satan to God." 

The other instance is related thus : — "Jan. 7, 1826. 
An elderly man called this morning, who comes from 
the parish of Sorbie, in Ayrshire. His family have 
been thrown into poverty, and some of them lost their 
lives, by means of a fire that consumed the most of 
his effects. I introduced the subject of religion, and 
soon found that, like the other Ayrshire man I talked 
with some time ago, he was ignorant of the very 
rudiments of the Gospel. Although he talked of the 
merits of Christ as having at any rate the chief in- 
fluence in the matter of our salvation, he could not 
tell how Christ's dying could benefit us, but only said 
that he was not a learned man, and did not under- 
stand these things. I endeavoured with all plainness 
and earnestness to declare to him the only way of 
salvation as being through the atonement of the great 
Emmanuel. He seemed affected, but would not, he 
said, give his full assent to what I said all at once ; 
he would need to think about it first. I advised him 

d2 



82 



LIFE AND DIARY OF THE / 



carefully to read the Bible, and to pray fervently for 
the teaching of the Holy Spirit, to guide him into all 
truth. I cannot but feel grateful at this new oppor- 
tunity I have had of making known the precious 
Jesus to a fellow-sinner. What an honour to be al- 
lowed to speak his praise !" 

The subject of this narrative,, while, as we have 
seen, he acquitted himself with fidelity as a teacher 
of youth, and cultivated the diffusive benevolence of 
a Christian, did not lose sight, it is obvious, of the 
ulterior object to which he had aspired from his child- 
hood — the service of God in the Gospel of his Son. 
Having been admitted, as was formerly stated, to the 
study of divinity in 1823, he heard the prelections of 
the late learned and excellent Dr Dick of Glasgow 
for five successive seasons. With how laudable a 
spirit he prosecuted his studies, both at Glasgow du- 
ring the session of the theological class in the months 
of August and September, and in the country, under 
the direction of the Presbytery, during the rest of the 
year, appears in some degree at once from his letters 
to friends, and from his memoranda in the Diary. 

With regard to the Professor, his lectures, prayers, 
and mode of conduct towards the students, he speaks 
in terms of the most sincere respect and esteem. A 
letter to a relative written during the first session, 
Sept. 22, 1823, conveys the following information : — 
u As you may have heard, there are an hundred and 
sixty-three students this year. When I came to the 
Hall, the Doctor was lecturing on the application of 
redemption. He has since been considering the bless- 



REV. JOHN HENRY GARDNER. 



8S 



ings of justification and adoption. He commenced 
with sanctification to-day, by explaining the term, 
and showing the difference between justification and 
sanctification, and also regeneration. His lectures 
are very interesting, and expressed in a very neat and 
simple manner. He delivers four every week. "We 
have three discourses every day except Saturday, 
when there are only two discourses, and an examina- 
tion on Hebrew and Greek, and on the subjects of 

the Doctor s lectures. Mr W , who lodges with 

me, delivered on Friday the 5th, and I on Wednes- 
day last. Although I had my homily written before 
I left home, I found great advantage from writing it 
completely anew, and having plenty of time for com- 
mitting it to memory. This Dr Dick some days ago 
advised us to do, in order that the discourses them- 
selves may be better, and that they may be delivered 
with more accuracy and freedom." 

The following notices are taken from his Diary : 
" Sept. 15, 1824. I attended the dinner given by 
some of the students to Dr Dick. There were present 
upwards of fifty-three. I enjoyed the evening very 
much. The appearance of great harmony and union 
of feeling and sentiment prevailed. The Doctor left 
us at half-past eight, and the party broke up a little 
after nine." — a Sept. 18. The Hebrew was read in the 
morning. The Doctor gave us a long lecture on not 
beginning Hebrew in time. He remarked, that in 
the best translations there may be, and will be errors, 
and that it is very pleasing and comfortable to be able 
to satisfy one's self that the translation he uses in his mi- 
nistrations among his people is a correct one." — ' ' Oct. 



VA 



LIFE AND DIARY OF THE 



12, Tuesday. The Hail closed. Dr Dick read a lec- 
ture on biblical criticism,, which I wrote after him as 
usual. He gave us some very weighty advices, and 
prayed for us with remarkable fervour. Never felt so 
much attached to this venerable man as I did to-day." 

This young man seems to have determined at no 
time to rest satisfied with mere external propriety or 
intellectual exertion. He was at pains,, above all, to 
cultivate the spirit of devotion. Had he a discourse 
to deliver, it led him to earnest prayer ; if he succeed- 
ed in his attempt, success was sanctified by cordial 
thanksgiving to God. No interviews with his fellow - 
students were more acceptable to him than those that 
had social prayer for their object ; and no day was 
hailed with a more cordial welcome than the holy 
Sabbath. These statements are justified by the few 
following extracts : — " Sept. 3, 1824. Rose up early ; 
endeavoured anew to devote myself to my Redeemer ; 
sought his assistance in the important duty before me ; 
delivered my discourse at the morning meeting of the 
Hall, and was approved of." — " Sept. 18. Now ap- 
proaches the sacred day of rest. that the grace of 
the Lord Jesus may be exceedingly abundant, and 
stir me up to a diligent performance of the duties of 
such a holy season. As for my sins, let them be at 
this time, and at every time, shut out ; and as for 
worldly cares, let them be detained from following 
me till I go yonder and worship." On a subsequent 
Saturday he says, a May I be prepared for hearing 
with humility the word of the gospel to-morrow, not 
as the word of man, but as the word of the living 
God." On the evening of the Sabbath after, he thus 



REV. JOHN HENRY GARDNER. 



85 



records his experience. — u Upon the whole, my mind 
has been in a better state this Lord's day than for 
many Sabbaths past. I hope the Lord has lifted up 
his countenance on me, and been gracious unto me. 
How much pride and carnality, however, remain in 
my heart, God alone can tell. As for me I cannot 
comprehend them. Mr Muter preached in the after- 
noon from Luke i. 31, ' Thou shalt call his name 
Jesus/ " — " Oct. 7- The students met to-day in the 
Hall at half-past four, when they engaged in devotional 
exercises. Mr Macdotvall, and Mr John Young, sen. 
officiated. A verypleasant meeting." — ei Sept. 28, 1825. 

Mr T delivered in the morning, and I at eleven 

o'clock. The Doctor made a few remarks, and then 
said, ' With these few remarks I approve of the dis- 
course.' I cannot but be grateful to Him who is 
ready to help in the time of need, for enabling me to 
discharge this important duty, without bringing any 
great dishonour upon myself, as I might do, if left to 
my own resources and strength." 

"With similar conscientiousness, he applied himself 
to the exercises required by the Presbytery under 
whose inspection he was placed. Nor did he fail to 
manifest the same dependence on God for counsel 
and aid, with the same humility and gratitude, in 
the event of success. — " July 6, 1824. Went to 
Lanark. On the road enjoyed some delightful con- 
templations of God as c my exceeding joy,' and in 
devoting myself to the glory of my Redeemer. 
Delivered my discourse on Acts iii. 22, the propheti- 
cal office of Christ, before the Presbytery, in Mr 
Harper's meeting-house. I got encouragement from 



86 



LIFE AND DIARY OF THE 



the Presbytery to proceed in my studies, and an 
excellent short advice from Mr Scott, the moderator, 
about studying divinity practically, and making the 
Bible my text-book ; which, O Lord, give me grace 
to follow." — " Nov. 29. After prayer,, in which I 
endeavoured to give myself and my worthless services 
to the Lord Jesus and his cause, and to ask his guid- 
ance and assistance, I began a sermon on Col. iii. 
17." — u Dec. 21. Began my sermon. The best way 
to succeed in sermon-making is for the writer him- 
self to enter practically into the subject. I have been 
endeavouring to do this, and to look with earnest- 
ness and faith to the blessed Redeemer." — " April 4, 
1826. I have now set myself to write my critical 
exercise for the Presbytery on 1 Pet. i. 21, a second 
time. Although I have spent a great deal of time 
in thinking about it, I have not yet arrived at a dis- 
tinct and satisfactory view of the passage. May God 
have compassion on my ignorance. O let my mind, 
in all its powers, be devoted to thee ; impart new 
vigour to my intellect, and tenderness to my affections; 
and let the one be devoted to the study, and the 
other to the love of the truth." — " April 5. I have to 
record with gratitude what I think was an answer to 
prayer. I this evening understood my text in its 
connexion better than ever I did before, and hope 
now, through the Divine assistance, I shall be able to 
discuss it to some good purpose. Before setting my 
mind to the consideration of it, I prayed for fixed- 
ness and clearness of thought, and these being in 
some measure obtained, led me into the meaning of 
the passage." — " May 24, I rode to Lanark on Tues- 



REV. JOHN HENRY GARDNER. 



87 



day morning in company with J W . We 

had a delightful day and useful conversation. I 
delivered first, and after me Mr Millar, a second 
year student, lectured, 'Whom he did foreknow,' 
&c, Rom. viii. The remarks on my exercise were 
almost all of them favourable, so that I was, and 
still am, in great danger of being elated. I scarcely 
expected there would be any occasion for striving 
against the bad effects of praise. Let me be very 
grateful for my success, and let it stimulate me to 
future exertions ; at least let it prevent me from 
being unnecessarily cast down." 

With respect to his reading, during the years of 
theological study, its range may not have been so 
extensive as that of many other candidates for the 
ministry. He was at considerable pains, however, 
to improve for this purpose the leisure he did possess. 
He also listened to the advice of friends relative to 
the books he should peruse, and whatever he read it 
was his endeavour to understand and digest. We 
formerly adverted to his veneration for the Scrip- 
tures as the supreme and decisive standard of faith, 
and to the pious feelings he cherished in the perusal 
both of that sacred volume and of human writings. 
His attention to the improvement of his mind will 
still farther appear from the following extracts : — 

In a letter addressed to a relative, the first winter 
after his entrance on the study of theology, he 
says — u As for my reading, I have tasted a little of 
Marckii Medulla. I have also read some sermons 
of Boston's and Ebenezer Erskine's, and also Dr 
Dick's Essay on the Inspiration of the Scriptures. 



88 



LIFE AND DIARY OP THE 



I have not yet ventured on Hervey's Dialogues, but 
expect to do so soon. I have tried to read, when 
time would at all permit, a little both of the Old and 
New Testaments in the originals. I am finishing 
Melville's Life, which has been to me, between hands, 
what Mr Brown calls a ' very good relaxation/ I 
have still Baxter's Reformed Pastor." A letter to 

his uncle W , dated April 16, 1825, contains 

the following statement : — " You will expect to hear 
something of my studies. I have delivered my lecture 
to the Presbytery ; it was on 1 Pet. i. 1, 2. I have 
begun a critical exercise for the Hall, on 1 Cor. i. 21. 
I have also written this winter two sermons on Col. iii. 
1 7, and one on Isaiah xlv. 22. I read a verse or two 
of the Hebrew Psalter, and a little Greek daily. I 
have not much time left for reading a great deal of 
English divinity. I am at present reading Witsius 
on the Creed." In winter 1826, he gives the follow- 
ing account to another uncle : — " I was not disap- 
pointed in reading Hurd on Prophecy, and intend to 
peruse it again. I am reading Home's Introduction, 
and Mr Andrew Swanston's Discourses. I have also 
been paying some attention to my Hall discourse, and 
have been jotting down, now and then, short notes 
on various texts. Henry Martyn's Memoir, Michael 
Bruce's Poems, and Alison on Taste, have occupied, 
or still occupy, the most of my hours for relaxation." 
To these particulars it may be added, that in a list 
of the books which he at one time obtained from the 
Students' Library for perusal in the country, he in- 
cludes Calvini Institutiones, with Mosheim's Com- 
mentaries, and Remains of Christian Antiquity. 



REV. JOHN HENRY GARDNER. 



89 



His decision of mind regarding the honourable but 
arduous profession he had chosen, seems to have 
increased with his years ; and the near approach of 
the period when he was expected to become a preacher 
of the gospel, roused him to greater ardour and acti- 
vity in study. In November 1825, after mentioning 
a certain young preacher he had just heard, and who, 
in conversation with him, had complained very much 
of the fatigue of public speaking, he adds : — " This 
ought certainly to excite me to see that I have pure 
and strong motives for entering on the work of the 
ministry, but ought not, I think, to deter me from it. 
Woe be to me, if ever I draw back from unwilling- 
ness to suffer fatigue, or even worse, for the name of 

the Lord Jesus ! J gave me Martyn's Memoirs 

in loan. My spirit stirs within me while I read the 
holy breathings of Henry's soul." A letter to a friend, 
of nearly the same date, contains the following cha- 
racteristical passage : — " I am in every respect enjoy- 
ing considerable happiness. I am happy in my teach- 
ing — happy in my studies — happy in my friends — 
and happy also, in some measure, in viewing myself 
as not my own, but bought with a price, and bound 
to spend my life, whether it be short or prolonged, 
in the service of the great Emmanuel. I am reading 
Henry Martyn with next to an excessive interest, 
and am trying to follow, though at a great distance 
indeed, the steps of his zeal and love. I was struck, 
in the course of my reading this admirable book, 
with my past indolence, and resolved to make every 
effort, in the strength of grace, to shake it off. The 
term of my studies at the Hall is within twenty-two 



90 



LIFE AND DIARY OF THE 



months of its conclusion, and therefore I find there 
is the most absolute necessity for making every thing- 
else give way to the following important objects — 
personal religion, English theological reading, Eng- 
lish composition, and the critical study of the Scrip- 
tures. I have divided my time among these as well 
as I can, and hope, through the Divine blessing, to 
make something like a proper improvement of the 
few precious moments that remain." 

Amongst the objects that particularly claimed his 
attention, he here includes English composition. Im- 
pressed, as he unquestionably was, with the superior 
importance of the accuracy and vigour of his senti- 
ments, he justly considered the language in which 
his sentiments were clothed, as entitled to a propor- 
tionate share of attention. The aversion he conse- 
quently cherished to the use of ff hackneyed expres- 
sions/' was almost fastidious. " There is one thing," 
he says in a letter to a friend, " that ought to be at- 
tended to, in writing a letter or any thing else. "We 
ought to avoid hackneyed expressions, and to speak 
as if never one before us had expressed the same idea 
in words. (It is very wrong, however, to become 
stiff or eccentric, through an attempt at originality.) 
In religious subjects especially, I would recommend 
variety and vigour of language. When our words 
are borrowed from others, it is almost impossible the 
thoughts which they convey should come fresh from 
our own minds, or should make much impression on 
the minds of others. For my part, I have resolved 
to avoid that sort of language which is really a dialect 
by itself, and may be called the theological dialect of 



REV. JOHN HENRY GARDNER. 



91 



the English tongue, and to use the ordinary intellec- 
tual dialect, except when I quote, or allude to, a 
Scripture expression." 

The most devoted student requires occasional re- 
laxation. For the salutary purpose of unbending the 
mind, he not only shared the pleasures of rational and 
entertaining conversation with persons of intelligence 
and piety, but somewhat indulged his natural propen- 
sity to cultivate the arts of music and poetry. Ac- 
cordingly, he says in his journal : " Feb. 10, 1825. 

Mr W of C sent his violin to me. Let 

me beware of indulging to excess my love of music/' 
— u Feb. 14. I relaxed myself a little by writing 
some poetry." — u I have taken your hints," he says 
also in a letter to an uncle, u about the improvement 
of the imagination. I have aimed at cultivating this 
faculty in some measure, by reading, with consider- 
able attention, Cowper's Poems, and by exercising 
my own hand a little in rhyme. I am afraid lest I 
become an enthusiast in these studies." His attached 
relatives and friends were not a little delighted with 
some short poems of his writing, as one on " The 
Voice of the Old Year," and another, entitled " A 
Prayer for Poor Ireland." To exhibit any of his 
verses, however, to the public eye, would be at least 
a questionable proceeding, after the strong terms in 
which he has expressed his own low opinion of their 
merit. " I am really tmning so correct in my taste," 
says he in a letter to a friend, " that I cannot bear a 
single line I write, when I attempt to be a poet. I 
believe there is scarcely a shred of real poetry in all 
the jingling ware I ever manufactured." 



92 



LIFE AND DIARY OF THE 



Hitherto we have not particularly adverted to an 
interesting trait in his character, that was developed 
at an early stage of his theological curriculum, and 
which eminently distinguished him to the last, namely., 
his missionary spirit. The proofs., indeed, we have 
seen of his spiritual benevolence towards children, 
and also those of riper age, both acquaintances and 
strangers, and the thrilling interest he felt in the me- 
moirs of Henry Martyn, show that his heart was ani- 
mated by those principles and feelings which natu- 
rally produce a sincere compassion for the heathen, 
and a desire to advance the cause of Christian mis- 
sions in pagan lands. The fact is, that he had scarcely 
been one year a student in divinity, when this subject 
began very deeply to impress his mind, and to occupy 
a considerable place in his thoughts and his prayers. 
— " Aug. 6, 1824. Read the newspapers, as usual. 
With how T little concern can I read of war, and blood- 
shed, and murder ! Yet I have been led sometimes 
to pray, when thinking of the revolutions of king- 
doms, the mandates of emperors, and the deliberations 
of cabinet councils, that all these may tend to the 
gradual extension of the kingdom of my Redeemer, 
till at last the Prince of Peace shall reign from 
scorched Africa to frozen Greenland — from polished 
Europe to the most savage islands of the vast Pacific." 
At a subsequent date he says, " Read the account of 
the annual meeting of the London Missionary Society 
with much interest. £ let thy way be known more 
and more on earth, and thy saving health among all 
nations. Let the people praise thee, Lord ; let all 
the people praise thee.' " 



REV. JOHN HENRY GARDNER. 



93 



The fervour of his missionary zeal induced him even 
to entertain serious thoughts of sacrificing the comforts 
of home, and personally undergoing the toils and suf- 
ferings of a Christian missionary in a distant country. 
Although he never proceeded to make an actual offer 
of his services, it is impossible to read his own ac- 
count of his feelings and exercises regarding it, with- 
out admitting the conviction of his heartfelt attach- 
ment to this great cause. We quote the following 
entries : — 

" Aug. 15, 1824. — I recollected that, in the begin- 
ning of last week, I had read in the Report of the 
Scottish Missionary Society, a call to students and 
preachers to consider whether it might not be their 
duty to devote themselves to the work of Christian 
missionaries. I seriously reflected whether this was 
my duty. Revolving in my mind the arguments on 
both sides, those which should bind me to my native 
soil dwindled into insignificance, before the thought 
of declaring to sinners abroad that name which is 
above every name. As soon as I arrived at home/' 
[he was on his way home after the public services of 
the Lord's day,] ei I knelt down, and humbly craved 
the direction of my heavenly Father in this most im- 
portant question. Let me not decide rashly, however 
strong I may feel my desire to preach among the 
heathen the unsearchable riches of Christ. I must 
make it the subject of frequent prayer, and of con- 
ference with my steadiest and most serious friends. 
O send out thy light and thy truth ! Guide me by 
thy counsel." 

" August 16. — Both morning and evening found 



94 



LIFE AND DIARY OF THE 



it good for me to draw near to God. How shall I 
conceive of the condescending love of my Father in 
heaven, who does not spurn from his presence even 
me, but accepts me graciously in the Beloved ! I was 
enabled, I trust by Divine grace, to make such a 
new surrender of myself wholly to the service of the 
Lord J esus, as to be ready to remain in my country, 
or to go to whatever point of the compass he may 
direct ; and in whatever situation, to spend and be 
spent in telling sinners that there is a Saviour, who 
is Christ the Lord. Prayed earnestly for Divine di- 
rection. I think that my interest in the extension 
of Emmanuel's reign, at home and abroad, has been 
gradually increasing for some time past. 

" I know of no obstacle, apart from my un wor- 
thiness, to my becoming a missionary, except the 
duty I owe to my dear dear mother. O my Mother ! 
could I leave thee, who must soon become a hoary- 
headed pilgrim, to go on without the youthful arm ot 
thy dear John Henry to support thee ? Shall I deny 
myself the melancholy satisfaction of paying the last 
honours to the best of mothers ? Or shall I be de- 
nied the soothing hand of my tender parent to minis- 
ter to me on the bed of death, and calmly to close 
my lifeless eyelids ? Heart-rending thought ! Yet 
if I should be deprived of both these sad gratifica- 
tions, will that dissolve our union to our never-dying 
and never-forgetting Friend ? No, no. ' Who shall 
separate us from the love of Christ ? ' A trial of no 
ordinary magnitude, I am sure, would my departure 
to a foreign land be to my mother, and my sister, 
and myself ; but if it be the will of my Saviour that 



REV. JOHN HENRY GARDNER. 95 

I should depart, he will not allow us to be tried 
above what we are able to bear, but will, with the 
temptation, give a way of escape. Let us cast our 
anchors on the Rock of ages ; and then, though 
stormy billows should roll betwixt us, we shall there 
have security for meeting soon, very soon, in the city 
that hath foundations, whose builder and maker is 
God. If, however, my dear mother shall abso- 
lutely forbid my devoting myself to this glorious work, 
then undoubtedly I must obey ; as Mrs Newell 
intended to do, had her mother opposed her depar- 
ture. Who is sufficient for these things ? Lord 
Jesus, thou art my sufficiency — thou art my all in all." 

He embraced an early opportunity, as might have 
been expected, of communicating his thoughts on 
this momentous subject to Mr Brown. In a letter 
to this worthy minister, dated Glasgow, Sept. 9, 1824, 
after stating the circumstances that had led him to 
ponder the question, u Is it my duty to offer myself 
as a missionary to the heathen ? " and alluding to the 
importance of mature deliberation and earnest prayer, 
as well as asking the advice of friends, he assigns 
reasons for delaying to consult his relations till he 
should hear his opinion, and continues thus : — a Argu- 
ing from the affection with which you have always 
treated me, and from the lively interest you take in 
the affairs of Zion, I have no reason to fear your 
thinking me obtrusive, when I request your counsel 
in the present crisis. So far as I can conceive of the 
feelings of a son towards a father, I do it with filial 
respect and confidence. Perhaps it will be necessary, 
before you offer any definite advice, that you should 



9(7 



LIFE AND DIARY OF THE 



be more fully acquainted with the state of my mind 
Avith respect to this matter. I shall be better able to 
inform you on this head, by answering your inquiries, 
than by giving you at once a general account of it. 
I may say, however, that I am endeavouring to aim 
at a simple and cheerful devotedness to the service of 
the Redeemer, whether he see fit to employ me in 
my native country or in a strange land. Above all, 
as what I need most is the instruction of my Father 
in heaven, I hope you will plead before his throne 
of grace, that I may have an unction from the Holy 
One, and, living or dying, may be the Lord's." 

To this letter the following prudent and affectionate 
reply was returned : — 

u Whitburn, Sept. 25, 1824. 

" My very dear young Friend, — Yours I re- 
ceived two weeks ago ; but as I immediately went 
to the Synod, I could not answer it. Your kind 
and filial respect I highly and tenderly regard, and 
hope to act as a father to you, since God so early 
deprived you of a kind and worthy father. I think 
you have acted very properly in seriously considering 
the matter, and also in setting apart some time for 
prayer with respect to it. * * * When I turn 
it over in my mind, I think your entire devotedness 
to the Redeemer fits you, in some measure, to be 
a missionary ; but I think with respect to bodily 
strength, and some other things I will mention when 
I see you, there may be hinderances. As you are so 
young, I think a considerable time may be usefully 
spent by you in most deliberately considering the 
matter. I will with pleasure set apart some time to 



REV. JOHN HENRY GARDNER. 



97 



pray about it, and we will talk it over by ourselves. 
I think also you should at least attend another year 
with the Professor, before you finally determine on 
the matter. Wishing you all grace from the Lord 
Jesus to fit you for whatever is his will with respect 
to you — I am, my very dear friend, yours, 

John Brown." 

The following memorandum of what passed be- 
twixt Mr Brown and his young friend on this subject 
at his own house at Longridge, about two months 
after the date of this letter, is quite characteristical : 
— ' ' Mr Brown took me aside for a few minutes, and 
in his kind warm manner addressed me to the follow- 
ing purpose : — ' Now, I am much obliged to you for 
telling me about yon, (the missionary question,) and 
I wish you aye to tell me of any thing that troubles 
you — any uneasiness you have ; and I hope you'll 
not forget me at home. Good-night ; farewell, my 
dear boy/ I cannot receive such kindness from this 
venerable servant of Christ, without feeling that it is 
really too much for me, who deserve so little." 

He thought proper to address letters on the same 
weighty topic, and of nearly the same date, to his 
uncles, from whom he received similar answers. 
Whilst they commended his zeal, they earnestly 
advised him to guard against a precipitate decision, 
and at least to complete the usual course of theologi- 
cal study. In this counsel he calmly acquiesced, and 
amidst all his deliberations he discovered an amiable 
delicacy to the feelings of his mother and sister. In 
December 1826, he writes in his journal, that after 

E 



98 



LIFE AND DIARY OF THE 



having conversed on tins point with his mother at 
Auchtermuchty more particularly than he had pre- 
viously done, he came to this resolution : — a Provi- 
dence does not call upon me to determine on going 
abroad, and therefore it is my duty to pay chief 
attention to those studies that are most likely to 
qualify me for the work of a home pastor, although 
still resolved to go wherever Christ shall be pleased 
to send me." 

His letters to his sister on this subject are too 
interesting, to be wholly omitted. The following 
specimen is extracted from one bearing date April 

1827 : — " You tell J that you have got free of 

certain fears you had formerly mentioned to her. If 
I may guess at these, I was the subject of them. 
What did you fear, my dearest Mary ? That your 
brother would leave all and follow Christ ? That he 
would be honoured as the messenger of eternal truth 
and unalterable love to the ignorant perishing hea- 
then ? Were you afraid lest by cheerfully parting 
with him for the sake of that Redeemer who bought 
you with his blood, you would ' receive in this life 
an hundred-fold, and in the world to come life ever- 
lasting?' Ought these things to excite fear in a 
Christian mind ? I know your fears proceed from 
affection to me, but I must reprove them, inasmuch 
as they are inconsistent with that degree of affection 
you owe to your Saviour. I entreat you to examine 
your own heart, and see if your love to me be not 
idolatrous. try solemnly, and in the strength of 
the Lord Jesus, to resolve willingly to part with me, 
if he should call me away from you. I wish you 



REV. JOHN HENRY GARDNER. 



99 



fully to understand, that even though I should be 
called and ordained at home, I would not by any 
means keep foreign service out of view, unless my 
health or some other circumstance absolutely bind 
me to my native land. These are my resolutions, 
and I trust you will not only avoid every thing that 
might tend to weaken them, but that you will 
strengthen them as much as you can by your prayers. 
I did not speak of the subject at first to grieve you, 
nor do I now again introduce it, that you may have 
' sorrow upon sorrow/ Do I need to tell you so ? 
I speak of it, because it is a subject which ought to 
kindle our souls into a flame of Divine love, not to 
overwhelm them with grief. We ought to be happy 
in each other, just in proportion as we see each 
other devoted to the Redeemer, and growing like 
him. What a poor enjoyment is ordinary friendly 
intercourse, in comparison of that interchange of 
affection which increases with the progress of the 
soul towards the character of God !" 

While the advices of friends, and the considera- 
tions they suggested, induced him to postpone his 
determination relative to missionary service in a 
foreign land, he seized every opportunity of promo- 
ting among Christians at home a spirit of zeal for the 
diffusion of the Scriptures and the Gospel. We find 
from his memoranda that he delivered speeches at 
meetings of Bible and Missionary Societies, held at 
Longridge, Midcalder, Kennoway, and 'several other 
places. He felt anxious, in particular, to see his 
fellow-students richly imbued with a missionary 



100 



LIFE AND DIARY OF THE 



spirit ; and few discovered greater activity than he 
in devising and supporting measures calculated to 
fan this noble flame. In September 1824, he says 
in a letter to a relative : — " The students have formed 
themselves into a Missionary Society. There was a 
general meeting held to-day for dividing the funds. 
It was agreed to divide them equally between the 
Scottish Missionary Society and the Highland Mis- 
sionary Society. I hope this will be the means of 
exciting some zeal amongst us in the best of causes, 
in which I really think we are very deficient. Our 
missionary students have been very active in this 
affair. They seem to be very devoted young men, 
and to be very diligent in the prosecution of their 
studies." His journal also contains the following 
notices on this topic : — 

" Glasgow, Sept. 3, 1826. — Having been chosen 
secretary both to the Student's Society for prayer, and 
to the Missionary Society, I desire now to give my- 
self up, as holding these offices, and as a student of 
the Bible, and as a redeemed sinner, to thee, my blessed 
Lord. I do not deserve thy favour, but to whom 
shall I go ? Thou, Divine Saviour, art my all in all." 
— " Sept. 22. Read an address to the Students' Mis- 
sionary Prayer Meeting. My object was to impress 
on my fellow-students the obligations under which 
we are, to revolve the question in our minds, 4 Ought 
we to offer ourselves as missionaries ? ' and to sug- 
gest things worthy of attention, in answering this 

question. I went with Mr L to his lodgings 

that same evening, to read a Hebrew chapter along 
with him, so that we had an opportunity of talking 



REV. JOHN HENRY GARDNER. 



101 



over the interesting subject. The evening before, I 

had conversed upon it with Mr P , and then with 

Mr C . Next morning I met with Mr B , 

whom, to my delighted surprise, I found to be deeply 
imbued with a missionary spirit. I have determined 
to make him an intimate friend." 

In his journal he records the fact, that, during the 
session 1827, a " Missionary Library was instituted 
in connexion with the Hall Missionary Society." 
From part of his epistolary correspondence, too, it ap- 
pears that he was both active and successful in per- 
suading some of his friends to make contributions 
for this library. In a letter of thanks to one of them, 
he says, " Be assured I will not publish your names. 
Perhaps we may serve the missionary cause most ef- 
fectually in this way. May we not expect that God 
will bless such publications, to the kindling of a 
heroic Christian spirit in our Hall, that may send some 
of the students to the ends of the earth with the ever- 
lasting gospel, and make those of them who shall re- 
main at home laborious, zealous, and faithful. If we 
put our trust in the Lord, the expectation is rational." 
In another communication addressed to the same cor- 
respondent, dated July 14, 1827, he adverts to a do- 
nation of missionary works, considerately given by 
the committee of the Scottish Missionary Society to 
the Association of Dr Dick's students for religious 
purposes, and then proceeds to mention his own in- 
tentions thus : — i( Since this is to be my last year at 
the Hall, I wish to make myself as useful as possible 
in exciting a missionary spirit among my fellow-stu- 
dents. But I speak perhaps too sanguinely, forget- 



102 



LIFE AND DIARY OF THE 



ting that my resolution may waver after I goto Glasgow, 
and see full in the face the difficulties that will beset 
me. I need not put you in mind to pray that Christ's 
grace may be sufficient for me — that He who finished 
the work given him to do, would, by perfecting 
strength in my weakness, enable me to follow his 
sacred steps. My principal difficulty will be, that 
the students will answer to all my entreaties, Go your- 
self. I cannot say, you know, ' Well, I shall go.' 
But this much, I think, may be said with safety ; / 
will do what I can to remove the obstacles that oppose 
my going ; and if I find it my duty to go, I shall, by 
Divine grace, by no means shrink from my duty" 

From the above extracts, it is evident that he must 
have cherished a warm attachment to faithful labour- 
ers in the missionary field, and that nothing served 
more to recommend any young man to his esteem, 
than satisfactory proofs of a truly missionary spirit. 
This, for example, proved the source of an intimate 
and lasting friendship betwixt him and the Rev. 
Hope Masterton Waddell, who has now for a series 
of years distinguished himself as an able and zealous 
workman in connexion with the Scottish Missionary 
Society, in the Island of Jamaica. His almost first 
notice of this interesting individual, in his journal, is 
expressed, in the following terms: — "Dec. 17, 1826. 
There are several circumstances that call for my grati- 
tude. I have formed an acquaintance with Hope 
M. Waddell, a missionary student, with whom I 
have just been conversing about the things of God. 
It is most delightful to see a character possessing a 



REV. JOHN HENRY GARDNER. 



103 



strong Irish peculiarity of complexion, so fully under 
the influence of religion." Referring to others of a, 
kindred spirit, on Jan. 13, 1827, he says — u It is 
probable that my dear friend Watson, with his bro- 
ther missionary Chamberlain, sailed from Greenock 
to-day. O thou who rulest the winds and the waves, 
do thou protect them, and bring them to their desired 
haven ! " 

Promising candidates for the ministry of the gos- 
pel, whether at home or abroad, were the objects of 
his very affectionate regard, and devoutly remembered 
at the throne of grace. Such were his feelings to- 
wards a young man, who for several years had occu- 
pied the same lodging with himself, first in Edinburgh, 

and afterwards in Glasgow. " Mr W ," says 

he in 1825, " left Glasgow, not without my earnest 
wishes and prayers for his safety, and happiness, and 
usefulness." How tenderly he concerned himself 
also in the welfare of a relative who became a preacher 
about two years before him, appears from the follow- 
ing expressions : — "Nov. 20, 1825. A letter from my 
uncle William contains some interesting information, 

especially that J n S r has been taken on 

trials for license. O I earnestly wish that my dear 
cousin may be guided by the Spirit of Christ in the 
important situation in which he is now placed, and 
prepared for public usefulness, by experience of the 
excellency of the knowledge of Jesus Christ our 
Lord." 

During the greater part of the years allotted to the 
study of theology, with the exception of the six or 



104 



LIFE AND DIARY OF THE 



seven weeks spent annually at Glasgow, he continued 
to occupy the school at Foldhouse, and to assist Mr 
Brown in imparting religious instruction to the young. 
Yet, as he had been at college only three sessions 
prior to his admission to the Divinity class, and had 
not studied Natural Philosophy, it was necessary, ac- 
cording to the regulations observed by the United 
Associate Synod, that he should attend the Univer- 
sity another session, before receiving license to preach 
the gospel. His attention was therefore turned to 
this matter in summer 1826, and, after deliberation, 
he came to the conclusion that it would be right for 
him finally to give up his school at the next autumn 
vacation, and to proceed to the study of Philosophy 
the winter immediately following, being that preced- 
ing his fifth and last session at the Divinity Hall. 

Conformably to this resolution, a short time after 
the close of his fourth session, he took up his resi- 
dence in Edinburgh, where he remained till the end 
of July. He says, accordingly, in his journal : — 

" Oct. 9, 1826. I am now lodged with ,and being 

near my friends at G , I feel very much at home. 

Father of mercies, let this little apartment in which 

1 now am, be made by thy presence a Bethel, such as 
I found my lonely habitation at Foldhouse during the 
past year." During this session he not only heard the 
lectures of the celebrated Professor Leslie on Natural 
Philosophy, but again attended the senior Greek class, 
and a private class for Hebrew. At this time, too, 
he gladly availed himself of Dr Brown's valuable in- 
structions to a number of students whom that active 
minister of Christ met with from week to week, for 



REV. JOHN HENRY GARDNER. 



105 



the purpose of forwarding their improvement in a 
critical acquaintance with the Scriptures. He also 
joined a theological society, that met every Saturday 
for mutual instruction and excitement. Alluding to 
the studies of this winter, in a letter addressed to an 
uncle, of date March 10, 1827, he expresses himself 
as follows : — " I can only give you a few general 
remarks. I trust the Natural Philosophy has not been 
altogether useless to me ; though I must confess, had 
I been a better mathematician, I would have under- 
stood the subject far better than I do. With respect 
to the Greek, I am sensible of some improvement. 
I can study the New Testament with more advantage 
than formerly, though not nearly with such success 
as I should wish. I am reading at present both the 
Old and the New Testaments in the original, and 
writing explanatory notes, and difficulties that occur 
to me, but which I am at the time unable to solve. 
I have already told you, I believe, that I think the 
students' theological class a very useful institution. 
I make a point to criticise almost every production 
that is read, and to speak also on the question dis- 
cussed, if I have any thing at all to say about it. 
Our questions are all connected with a passage of 
Scripture. Mr Brown's class met last night, and read 
the 9th chapter of John. We heard a lecture from 
Mr Brown on Romans x. 5, and some of the follow- 
ing verses, and an exercise from a student on these 
words, ' Every man shall bear his own burden.' I 
shall probably read next week. My text is, ' Bear ye 
one another's burdens, and so fulfil the law of Christ.' " 
In a letter to his mother, bearing date April 27, 

e2 



106 



LIFE AND DIARY OF THE 



1827, he gives the substance of an interesting ad- 
dress by Dr Brown to this class of students, which, 
we trust, may be here recorded without impropriety. 
The extract runs thus : — "■ After thanking the Friday 
class last week for a present we had given him, he 
spoke nearly as follows : — ' I do not think I deserve 
such a mark of your gratitude and esteem ; for, I 
must say, the pleasure I myself derive from our meet- 
ings is one principal reason that makes me value 
them. With respect to yourselves, the benefit arises 
not so much from any instruction you may get here, 
as from your minds being directed to a particular 
kind of study — the critical study of the Scriptures. I 
look back with pleasure on an advice I got, while a 
boy at college, from Dr Charles Stuart, in reference 
to this. I did not then pay much attention to it, nor 
did I discover its value until after I had been several 
years a minister. I found by experience that he who 
wishes to labour for the good of others, either with 
pleasure or success, should derive his theological views 
immediately from the Bible. I for the first time set 
myself in earnest to the careful study of the Scriptures ; 
and I can assure you that no study has ever afforded 
me so much satisfaction. In studying the Bible for 
himself, one's mind is, if I may so speak, brought 
into close contact with the mind of God/ " 

He adverts repeatedly in his Diary to Dr Brown's 
public discourses — his delight in hearing them — and 
the impressions they made upon his mind. Let two 
examples suffice : — " Oct. 9, 1826. Yesterday week 
heard Mr John Brown, who lectured in the forenoon, 
Heb. i. 2, and preached in the afternoon from these 



REV. JOHN HliNRV GARDNER. 



107 



words, ' Behold I bring you good tidings of great 
joy.' Let it be my ambition, in the composition of 
my discourses, to imitate Mr Brown s simple, nervous, 
and impressive manner of exhibiting Divine truth to 
sinful men." — "Dec. 17- Last Sabbath Mr John 
Brown preached a funeral sermon for the venerable 
Dr Hall, who died in the firm faith of those blessed 
truths which he proclaimed to others in such a sweet 
and edifying manner. Some of his last sayings were 
these: — 'Lord Jesus, where and when thou wilt, I 
know that my Redeemer liveth,' &c. Mr Brown's 
forenoon text was, c Come, see the place where the 
Lord lay;' and in the afternoon he preached from 
that part of our Lord's intercessory prayer, ' Father, 
I will that they whom thou hast given me be with 
me where I am.' '* 

In several confidential letters he wrote during this 
winter, he complains of comparative distance from 
God. u I do not hold," says he, such real com- 
munion with Him here, as I was blessed with in my 
room, and during my solitary walks, at Foldhouse." 
It is evident, however, that the tone of his. mind was 
still decidedly spiritual ; that he was sincerely desi- 
rous of communion with his heavenly Father, and 
that he conscientiously improved the means of sub- 
duing sin, and making advances in conformity to the 
Saviour's image. This, in some degree, appears from 
the manner in which he continued to examine his 
own heart and ways, and to pour out his earnest 
prayers to God in the immediate prospect of the 
Lord's Supper, and after the conclusion of that sacred 



108 



LIFE AND DIARY OP THE 



feast. The following memoranda supply a useful 
specimen of these pious engagements : — 

" Nov. 9, Thursday, 1826. This day was observed 
as a fast, in the view of the Lord's Supper on Sabbath 
first. Mr Thomas Brown * preached in Rose Street 
from 1 Pet. i. 14, and Psalm iv. 6. My hard heart 
would not receive a single impression. In the even- 
ing, however, my heart was somewhat drawn out to 
God in prayer and self-examination. I began with 
interrogating myself as to my belief in the inspira- 
tion of the Bible, and endeavoured to go regularly 
over the plan of mercy there revealed, inquiring into 
the effect each part of it has produced in me. I am 
satisfied God has shown me mercy, though I have 
much reason indeed to cry, ' Help my unbelief j give 
me some love to thee ; and purge away my sin/ 
Read the first six chapters of the Gospel of John, 
with this simple object in view, to know something 
of the Saviour. I have seldom felt so much the 
benefit of calm self-inquiry. O Lord, enable me to 
be more attentive in future to this most important 
and most profitable duty." 

" Nov. 12, Sabbath evening. — In the retrospect 
of this day, I have much need to mingle together 
gratitude, penitence, and supplication. I have much 
reason for gratitude, because I have heard a very 
clear statement of the manner in which God is just, 
while he justifies ungodly sinners like me, and be- 
cause Jesus Christ has been set before me crucified 



* The late Rev. Thomas Brown, D.D., Dalkeith. 



REV. JOHN HENRY GARDNER. 



109 



and slain, in the memorials he himself has appointed. 
Although my conceptions have been dark, and my 
feelings languid, and though, in consequence of this 
darkness and languor, I have not had a very bright 
view of the King in his beauty, nor felt my soul 
burning within me in love to him ; yet I have seen 
him, and have some desire to see him again, and to 
see him better. I have not been permitted altogether 
to forget the Lord that bought me. The Saviour has 
been revealed to me in the endearing relation of 
brother and friend. Yea, I have felt myself called 
upon, in infinite mercy, to address and depend upon 
him as my Father, and as the guide of my youth. 
These are some of the mercies for which I ought to 
be grateful. ' Bless the Lord, then, O my soul ; and 
all that is within me, bless his holy name.' But I 
have cause of penitence, as well as thanksgiving. 
Divine truth has not engaged my attention very 
closely. The great subject of it has not had the 
undivided throne of my affections. I have felt little 
amazement at the wonders of redeeming mercy. Sin 
has not appeared so very horrible to me as it surely 
must be, whether I see it to be so or not. I have 
not been much influenced by a solemn sense of the 
Divine presence. Idle and wicked thoughts have 
passed and repassed through my mind. I have often 
used the accents of praise and the attitude of suppli- 
cation, without singing with the heart or praying with 
the spirit. These are some of the sins of this one 
day, and they are aggravated by their being com- 
mitted while the Saviour was visibly before my eyes. 
After coming home, the first petition I could address 



no 



LIFE AND DIARY OF THE 



at the throne of grace was, ' Lord, enter not into 
judgment with thy servant.' How much need have 
I, too, for supplication, along with thanksgiving and 
confession. O that I may be wholly God's, in soul 
and in body, in thought, in affection, in will, and in 
action, that in every thing I may acknowledge my 
Father in heaven, and that he may keep me in the 
right path, upholding my goings that my footsteps 
may not slide. Let these be the blessings for which 
I daily and hourly plead. Pour on me the Spirit of 
grace and supplications." 

Here it should not be omitted, that while, during 
his stay in Edinburgh, the company of several fel- 
low-students in divinity afforded him peculiar delight, 
he discovered a concern to reap benefit from them, 
not merely as a theological scholar, but also as a 
Christian. He took sweet counsel with them, in 
reference to the most effectual means of promoting 
progress in holiness. Agreeably to the suggestion of 
one of them, he determined " to make a solemn 
covenant with God, and to renew it every morning 
and evening ;" while he adds — " But since all means 
are weak, because opposed by desperate wickedness. 
I desire, Almighty Father, to make use of this one, 
deeply convinced of the necessity of thy blessing, in 
order to render it successful in any degree. He then 
subjoins a series of pious resolutions, which are ex- 
pressed as follows : — 

" Dec. 17, 1826, Monday morning.— I entreat 
thee, Lord, to enable me to observe the following 

RESOLUTIONS \ 

u 1. That I will take God in Christ, the God of 
my fathers, as my father, and the guide of my youth. 



REV. JOHN HENRY GARDNER. 



Ill 



" 2. That, as all the evils in my heart arise from 
faintness of conception and belief with respect to the 
Divine character, I will every morning and evening 
read a portion of the Scriptures, with this object 
expressly in view, that I may know more of the glory 
of God in the face of Jesus ; and will at those sea- 
sons, and at other times, earnestly pray for the illu- 
minating influence of the Spirit of truth, on the 
ground of my heavenly Father's gracious offer and 
promise. 

" 3. That when any idol seems to be usurping the 
throne in my heart, which is the right only of my 
King and my God, I will send up an ejaculatory pe- 
tition for the restoration of my soul ; at the same 
time endeavouring to turn away my thoughts from 
the idol to him who is the true God and eternal life. 

" 4. That the slightest licentiousness of thought or 
desire being destructive of my intellectual energy and 
of my real happiness, both in time and eternity, and 
being a most fearful provoking of the Holy One of 
Israel, a crucifying of the Son of God afresh, and a 
doing despite to the Spirit of grace, who has already 
striven against it in my heart, I will endeavour to 
avoid seeing, or hearing, or reading what would in 
any way encourage it ; and that if my mind be at any 
time polluted, I will not rest till I am assured it is 
washed, and purified, and sanctified in the name of 
the Lord Jesus, and by the Spirit of my God. 

"5. That I will strive against the workings of pride 
and self-conceit, and will try to prefer others to my- 
self. 

" 6. That all my studies shall have an ultimate re- 



112 



LIFE AND DIARY OP THE 



ference to the service of Christ, and shall be carried 
on in a spirit of dependence on Him. 

" 7- That I will seize every opportunity of making 
the Saviour known to sinners, and of speaking of his 
excellency with his dear saints. I will do every thing 
in my power to serve every friend of Jesus, chiefly 
that I may honour Him. 

" 8. That I will be as careful as possible of precious 
time, rising at this season of the year as soon as there 
is sufficient light ; and for this purpose going sooner 
to bed than I have been doing ; for the morning 
hours are more valuable than the evening ones. I 
will endeavour, when I call on a friend, not to spend 
more time than is necessary with him. 

" 9. That every day I will think of my mortality, and 
try to live as a stranger and pilgrim on the earth, 
looking for a better country, which is a heavenly. 

" In the strength of Christ, my all. 

"John Henry Gardner. 

« December 17, 1826." 

These truly good resolutions having been formed 
u in the strength of Christ," it is reasonable to hope 
that they were, on the whole, remembered and car- 
ried into effect. Among others, the seventh, which 
relates to seizing opportunities of diffusing the know- 
ledge of the Saviour, was not forgotten. Amid his 
efforts to acquire, he was careful to communicate 
knowledge. About this time, partly to assist in de- 
fraying his own necessary expenses, he exerted him- 
self in the capacity of tutor to the son of a gentleman, 
who was attending the new academy in Edinburgh. 



REV JOHN HENRY GARDNER. 



113 



But he also cheerfully embraced opportunities of per- 
forming gratuitous services for the spiritual benefit 
both of the young and the old. Accordingly, an- 
other student and he jointly undertook the care of a 
Sabbath school at Libberton, to which he alludes in 
the following passage of a letter to a friend : — " Edin- 
burgh, Feb. 7, 1827- I am happy that I can inform 
you of the improvement of my Sabbath scholars (at 
Libberton) in their conduct in school. The Sabbath 
before last, they behaved as well as the Longridge 
ones. I trust God has a purpose of love to execute 
in reference to some of them. You will agree with 
me in thinking holiness of heart the most important 
qualification of a teacher, who would do good to the 
souls of children. Without this, it is heartless, hope- 
less work." In compliance, too, with particular re- 
quest, he gave a word of exhortation, in one instance 
at least, to a group of aged people inhabiting another 
village in the vicinity of Edinburgh. " On Saturday 
evening," he says in a letter to a relative, dated April 
1827, " I will probably be out at Swanston, a village 
at the foot of Pentland hills, where the missionary 
students deliver addresses to the old people once a- 
month. They have requested me to officiate next 
time, which I intend, in reliance on the Divine bless- 
ing, to do." 

Students in divinity ought to consider well the 
benefit their own souls may derive from the efforts of 
spiritual charity, as well as their utility to others. 
This young man was still able to state that his expe- 
rience accorded with the inspired proverb, " He that 
watereth, shall be watered also himself." In a letter 



114 



LIFE AND DIARY OF THE 



to his mother, alluded to above, after deploring his 
comparative coldness in religion, he adds, " My 
Sabbath school however, has, I think, done me 
some good. 0, my dear mother, ask nothing for me 
but holiness. Having this, I shall, I am sure, want 
nothing that is good. I must request an interest in 
your family petitions, as well as the secret devotions 
of each of you." 

He prolonged his stay in Edinburgh, at once dis- 
charging the duties of a tutor and improving oppor- 
tunities of promoting his own advancement in know- 
ledge, till the end of July ; soon after which he went 
to Glasgow, to attend Dr Dick's theological class for 
the fifth and last time. The writing of his journal, 
however, was discontinued for the space of seven 
months, and not resumed till the 25th October 1827, 
a few weeks after the close of the session. In the 
entry of that date he deeply regrets his negligence, 
and at the same time briefly alludes to the principal 
occurrences of the interval. Yet we have already 
seen the spirit and manner in which he acquitted 
himself at Glasgow during the successive sessions of 
his curriculum ; and among the few circumstances 
comprised in that memorandum, we need only notice 
the auspicious opening of a brotherly correspondence 
betwixt Dr Dick's students and those of Dr Thom- 
son of Paisley, the learned professor of the Relief 
Synod : — 

" A correspondence with the Relief Hall was 
opened by a society composing the majority of the 
students attending our Hall. A deputation was sent 
consisting of H R , P D , J 



REV. JOHN HENRY GARDNER. 115 



S , and myself. Other two were appointed, but 

left Glasgow before the time came. We were very 
cordially received." 

The particulars respecting Mr Gardner's license to 
preach the Gospel, will fall to be introduced at the 
beginning of the next period of his life. 



116 



LIFE AND DIARY OF THE 



PERIOD III. 

FROM HIS RECEIVING LICENSE TO PREACH THE GOSPEL TILL 
THE TIME OF HIS RESOLVING TO ACCEPT THE CALL TO 
WHITHORN. 

After serious consideration and earnest prayer, 
he resolved to preach the Gospel in Scotland, if 
judged qualified for the work, and with that view to 
place himself under the superintendence of the United 
Associate Presbytery of Cupar. Having, therefore, 
obtained the necessary testimonials, he came to reside 
within the bounds of that Presbytery, a short while 
after the termination of his last session at the Hall. 

A letter which he wrote to an uncle, dated Auch- 
termuchty, 11th October 1827, serves to indicate the 
state of his mind at this interesting juncture. Hav- 
ing adverted to the gratification he had derived from 
recent interviews with relatives and friends in a 
variety of places, and to the delight he now felt " at 
the idea of settling for some considerable time at the 
home of my earlier years, and among those who are, 
and have always been, so dear to me," he thus con- 
tinues : — 

" For this winter I have certainly before me the 
prospect of very peculiar advantages, with regard to 
opportunities for study. Having no teaching to at- 
tend to, it will be my chief business, and will not, 
besides, be liable to so many interruptions as it would 



REV. JOHN HENRY GARDNER. 



117 



hare been exposed to, had I been residing in Edin- 
burgh. The circumstances in which I am now placed 
as a candidate for the most exalted office on earth — 
a herald of the cross of Christ — are so intensely in- 
teresting as to excite me, if any thing can, to vigorous 
and persevering application. I wish I could fully 
appreciate those advantages, and faithfully improve 
them. But I know by experience that resolutions 
are of little avail; nor does even a fair and promising 
beginning to study, render certain its energetic prose- 
cution and successful termination. To speak the 
truth to a friend who, while he cannot but blame me 
severely, will not fail to pray for me, there is a natu- 
ral indolence about me, which has never been tho- 
roughly subdued — a disposition also to allow the 
mind to flit from theme to theme, and often to want 
a serious subject of reflection altogether. Now, if 
ever, must this indolence be shaken off. What 
can a listless inactive mind do in the service of 
Christ ? It will only bring dishonour on the Master 
it professes to serve, and misery upon itself. that 
the Spirit of God would give me such a glorious and 
overwhelming view of that Gospel it is my wish to 
proclaim, that every thing else may seem trifling and 
worthless, in comparison of the excellency of the 
knowledge of Christ Jesus my Lord, and every exer- 
tion of mind, however laborious, seem easy and 
pleasant, that is made in preparation for the work of 
the ministry. I shall gladly accept your kind invi- 
tation to come to K after the Presbytery meets. 

I look forward with satisfaction to the advantages I 
may expect to derive from being more retired for a 



118 



LIFE AND DIARY OF THE 



while than I could be even here, and also from your 
counsel and assistance." - 

The same sense of the vast importance of the office 
to which he aspired, and the necessity of aid from 
above, is expressed in his reply to another uncle, 
who invited him to address his congregation at Alloa, 
soon after he should be authorized to preach : — " If 
it please God," says he, " to allow me to preach the 
everlasting Gospel, it will certainly give me the 
highest satisfaction to address the congregations of my 
two uncles, and also of those other ministers who 
have shown me peculiar kindness, though not related 
to me. But, in the mean time, my duty is not so 
much to anticipate where or when I shall preach, as 
to ponder the Apostle's question, ' Who is sufficient 
for these things ? • and to labour after experiencing, 
like him, the grace of the Redeemer sufficient for 
me, and his strength made perfect in weakness." 

The few following memoranda from his Diary tend 
still further to show how his mind was exercised and 
impressed at this era of his life, while they include 
some particulars regarding his appearances before the 
Presbytery, and succeeding occurrences : — 

" Anchtermuchty, Oct. 28, 182 7-— Finished The 
Life of Urquhart, who died Jan. 10th this year, aged 
eighteen years and a half. How diligent was he ! 
How ardently and entirely devoted to God, and how 
ripe for heaven ! Well may I blush when I think 
of the contrast which, in all these respects, there is be- 
twixt John Urquhart and me." — " Kennoway, Nov. 4, 
Sabbath. Have had more communion with God to- 
day than I remember of having enjoyed for a long 



REV. JOHN HENRY GARDNER. 



119 



time. In secret prayer, both in the morning before 
public worship, and immediately after its conclusion 
in the evening, I felt in some measure drawn near to 
God. The part of the public service I most cordially 
joined in, was the first prayer. I remembered the 
Redeemer s death over the symbols of his body and 
blood, not without satisfaction of mind as to his 
expiation of my guilt, and not without some grati- 
tude and self-dedication to him j though, alas ! with 
a coldness that ill becomes a redeemed sinner, Avhen 
the Lamb of God that took away his sin was set 
before his eyes crucified and slain. Tried to direct 
my thoughts while at the table to my circumstances 
as a candidate for the office of an ambassador for 
Christ. Dr Taylor preached in the evening from 
Heb. xii. 14, ' Follow holiness, without which no 
man shall see the Lord.' Was peculiarly gratified 
by a clear and practical exhibition of the truth on 
the all-important subjects of holiness and the way of 
attaining it." — " Nov. 7- With 'regard to my studies, 
read the 2d and 3d epistles of John in Greek — part 
of Stuart's Letters on the Trinity ; wrote part of my 
sermon on 2 Cor. vi. 1." — " Auchtermuchty, Jan. 25, 
1828. Delivered two of my trial discourses before 
the Presbytery of Cupar on the first day of the year, 
along with my fellow-students, Messrs Johnston and 
John Reid." — " Kennoway, Feb. 27. Yesterday I 
was licensed by the Presbytery of Cupar, along 
with Mr Johnston, to preach the glorious Gospel of 
the blessed God. I trust the great Head of the 
Church has not permitted his servants to come to a 
decision contrary to his will. If they have done so, 



120 



LIFE AND DIARY OF THE 



I think my sincere desire is, that he may reverse it. 
In the mean time I wish to be wholly devoted to his 
service in the preaching of the cross." — " March 2, 
Sabbath. I have just a little ago retired from the 
house of God, where I was honoured, unworthy as I 
am, to speak of the glories of the upper world, from 
Rom. viii. 30. "Was not much under the influence 
of terror for the audience ; but, on the other hand, 
not very much affected by the consideration of the 
responsibility of the place I occupied. Lord, thou 
only knowest my imperfection and weakness, and 
thou only hast grace sufficient for me, and strength 
to make me perfect." 

Thus it appears that, having creditably passed 
through all the customary exercises, he, with his sur- 
viving friend the Rev. Charles Johnston of Monk- 
?vearmouth, was licensed to preach the Gospel on 
Tuesday, Feb. 26th. On that occasion the Rev. Peter 
Taylor of Ceres, moderator, addressed suitable ex- 
hortations to the young men. Two months before, 
also, John Henry received a kind letter from Mr 
Brown of Whitburn, containing a few hints of advice. 
f< My hearty wish," says that venerable man, u is, 
that the Lord Jesus may be with your spirit. Lay 
up a considerable number of discourses while you are 
at home, and this will be useful to you afterwards. 
Much prayer will fit you for preaching the Gospel, 
receiving grace thereby from a redeeming God. My 
son, be strong in the Lord, and in the power of his 
might. Read much of your Bible, and much of Mr 
Boston, particularly on the covenants, and Witsius on 
the Creed. All grace be with my very dear friend." 



REV. JOHN HENRY GARDNER. 121 

He knew well, in fact, how to value the good 
wishes and prayers of relatives and friends. A few 
moments after receiving license, he wrote this hasty 
note to his sister : — " My dear Mary, I just send you 
a pencil- written note, to inform you that this day I 
have heen licensed to preach the everlasting Gospel. 
I request an interest in your prayers on this serious 
occasion. I write at the table among the ministers, 
and therefore I can only add that I send my kindest 
affection to our mother and you." In a letter to an 
intimate friend, bearing date Auchtermuchty, March 
10th, he expresses himself in the following terms: — 
rt I was licensed on the 26th ult. I preached for 
my uncle in the afternoon of the Sabbath succeeding, 
from Rom. viii. 30, — ' Them he also glorified.' Yes- 
terday I addressed my grandfather's people from 
Paul's account of his preaching, ' We preach Christ 
crucified.' You will, I doubt not, allow me a special 
interest in your prayers, now that I have entered on 
a work of so much difficulty and such awful respon- 
sibility as that of a preacher of the Gospel, an am- 
bassador for Christ. A young preacher, you know, 
is in danger of nothing so much as of forgetting the 
real object of his office, and making it only an occa- 
sion of his gaining the approbation of men, even 
though he should have no reasonable grounds for 
expecting a great degree even of this worthless re- 
compense. Pray then that I may be preserved from 
such a fatal snare. You will wish probably to know 
how I felt with respect to the fear of man in the 
pulpit. Happily I did not feel this influence me 

F 



122 



LIFE AND DIARY OF THE 



much. If a large measure of the fear of God were 
substituted in its place, I will do as well without it." 

It was not merely at the commencement of his 
career as a preacher, that he was attentive to the 
workings of his own heart. Amid the numerous 
journeys and labours assigned him, and the great 
diversity of scenes and company through which he 
passed, we still find him often sitting in judgment on 
the state and exercise of his own soul, impartially 
reviewing the manner in which his official duties 
were performed, lamenting his deficiencies and faults, 
looking upwards for direction, strength, and success, 
cheerfully submissive to an all- wise Providence, and 
cultivating a spirit of gratitude to God and man. It 
is impossible to describe the circumstances of his 
mental condition to better advantage than in the 
language which, at different dates, fell from his own 
pen : — 

" Ferry-jjort-on-Craig, March 25, 1828, Tuesday. 
— Preached on Sabbath to Mr Blair's congregation, 
but with little real animation or feeling. Went to 
Dundee yesterday, and returned to-day. On my 
return to this place, I found a letter lying for me from 
my cousin R S , asking me to go to Liver- 
pool to preach for six weeks, and then to Blackburn. 
I have written him signifying my willingness to go, 
unless some very powerful obstacle present itself that 
I do not know of. May I find that I can do all 
things through Christ that strengtheneth me ! I have 
laid down a principle for myself, which I -trust I shall 
be enabled to act on — that I shall never decline 



REV. JOHN HENRY GARDNER. 



123 



preaching, merely because I am not to be paid for it ; 
and shall never preach for payment, when I would 
not have done it simply for the sake of preaching." 

ci Liverpool, April 14. — Preached twice yesterday. 
Felt the duty much more pleasant than it was last 
week ; was enabled, especially in the evening, to 
speak with some degree of animation and earnest- 
ness. But oh ! how little love do I feel to that 
Saviour, whose deeds and sufferings of mercy were 
the subject of my public addresses. How little 
communion with him in secret ! How little habi- 
tual devotedness to him ! Read on Saturday part 
of Owen on Spiritual-mindedtiess, and was made to 
feel ashamed and confounded at the small measure in 
which I experienced what he describes. When 
speaking of spiritual thoughts, one test he mentions 
for trying their genuineness is, that when this is their 
character, they will rise spontaneously in the mind 
without external impulse or inward force. Now, 
thoughts quite the opposite of these seem to flow 
from my heart, as from their native fountain. But 
I think I do not deceive myself when I say, that I 
wish holy thoughts and affections were more conge- 
nial to my mind." 

66 Biggar, August 17- — Was not so comfortable as 
last Sabbath previously to going to the pulpit ; yet 
the grace of God was sufficient for me. He did not 
leave me entirely to myself in the discharge of my 
official duties. Still, as always, I must conclude 
the Sabbath with the prayer of the publican, ' God 
be merciful to me a sinner.' Strange ! that I have 
such reluctance to fellowship with God in medita- 



124 



LIFE AND DIARY OF THE 



tion, in Scripture reading, and in prayer, although 
I well know how pleasant I find such intercourse 
with my Father in heaven, when I do sincerely seek 
and really obtain it. This evening the Spirit of 
adoption and of prayer wrought upon my heart, and 
drew me near to the living God. Such communion 
I feel to be the life of my soul : I am worse than dead 
*hen without it." 

^Edinburgh, Sept. 11. — Thursday. This is my 
birthday ; and I must not let it pass without some 
grateful and penitential recollections. T have now 
completed my twenty-first year in this world of sin 
and suffering, in which I have done so little to 
escape its evils myself, or snatch others from them. 
£ Enter not into judgment with thy servant,' is the 
prayer which I need every day, but especially on the 
day which brings a whole year, and the whole past 
part of my life at once into view. I preached in the 
evening at Kennoway, on the last Sabbath of August, 
for the Bible Missionary Society, from Rom. i. 16 ; 
and though it was with difficulty I wrote the dis- 
course, I delivered it with considerable interest and 
pleasure. I did not, however, get it all so well 
finished as I could have wished, having delayed 
it so long ; which I trust will read me a lesson in 
future, not to depend upon a single week for a dis- 
course that must be ready. This last Sabbath I 
preached in Brmtghton Place, Edinburgh ; forenoon 
on the Shepherds of Bethlehem, afternoon on Heb. 
iii. 12 ; which last discourse I then wrote on Satur- 
day with improvements. Though in that large 
house, and before a great number of my friends who 



REV. JOHN HENRY GARDNER. 



125 



had never heard me before, I was enabled to speak 
with presence of mind and some degree of animation. 
I have been too anxious, however, to hear good 
opinions expressed of the manner in which I preach- 
ed. Let me thankfully accept of the encouragement 
aiforded me by a kind Providence, when judicious 
friends express their approbation ; but surely it is not 
consistent with c simplicity and godly sincerity/ to 
listen so eagerly to the voice of flattery. Mr dear 

friend J Y was so kind as to tell me quietly 

this evening, a few things which he had observed 
awkward in my manner of delivery." 

:i Dalkeith, Sept. 26. — Saturday. Preached at 
Haddington the Sabbath before last to a vacant con- 
gregation. Many of my friends urged me to do my 
utmost to make an impression, in the carnal sense of 
these words ; and certainly the circumstance of their 
having been just disappointed, was not unfavourable 
to me. I did feel desirous to make an impression of 
the kind, but I think too much so. If I believe 
that Christ is the Head and Ruler of the Church, 
who appoints every thing in it to the best advantage, 
and if I acknowledge myself but a servant in that 
great house over which he presides, it is his preroga- 
tive, not mine, to choose the scene of my labours. 
My business is simply to devote myself to his will 
and his direction — to do my duty in endeavouring to 
save sinners by the preaching of the gospel, and 
prayer for the fulness of the blessing to accompany it." 

" December 16. — Tuesday . Left Inverness by the 
coach at three o'clock, and Avas much disappointed 
on reaching Forres, to learn that Mr Scott's funeral 



126 



LIFE AND DIARY OF THE 



had taken place that day — a day sooner than was 
first appointed. Attended the anniversary of Forres 
Bible Society on Thursday the 18th December. Du- 
ring that week I tried to write a discourse on the 
subject of Death and Eternity, to preach at Burgh- 
head the Sabbath following ; but I found, in making 
the attempt, that I could scarcely realize these futuri- 
ties as true, or feel them as important, and, therefore, 
how exceedingly unfit I was for pressing them on 
the attention of others. While I was at Burghhead 
for a day or two, every thing, especially about Mr 
Scott's room, and books, and church, seemed to speak 
of him to me, and to say, the place that now knows 
him shall know him no more for ever." 

" Banff, May 31, 1829— Sabbath evening. I have 
this day finished my engagement with the Banff con- 
gregation, which was for five Sabbaths. What is 
worthy of remembrance with respect to the time I 
have spent here ? First, What mercies have I enjoyed ? 
I have had, on the whole, excellent health, without 
which I could not have possibly gone through the 
duties that devolved on me from preaching thrice on 
Sabbath, and visiting the sick through the week ; 
since I had several of my discourses to write after 
coming here. I have been exceedingly comfortable 

in my lodgings. Mr and Mrs C have treated 

me with very great friendship, and I shall leave them 
with no inconsiderable regret. This was another cir- 
cumstance very essential to the proper discharge of 
my duties. Had the case been otherwise, I would 
probably have been much less cheerful ,* and, of con- 
sequence, much less active than I have been. I had. 



REV. JOHN HENRY GARDNER. 



127 



besides, an opportunity of attending a small praying 
society, composed of several members of the congre- 
gation. The meeting renewed my old feelings, when 
I used to hold sweet counsel with the plain pious 
men, who, in the Whitburn congregation, were in the 
habit of meeting at intervals for mutual edification 
and united prayer. I ought not to omit my being 
enabled to write so many new discourses, having 
composed six, and preached five, during the last four 
weeks — a much greater task than I ever before ac- 
complished in so short a time. Finally, I have had 
several opportunities of comforting the afflicted and 
the sick. 

" Secondly, What are the sins of the last month ? 
I have to set down at the beginning, here as well as 
in many other instances, my worldly- mindedness. I 
have been actuated too much, indeed almost wholly, 
in what I have done by worldly and selfish consider- 
ations. I have tried to write and to preach for God 
and men's souls, but my carnal mind has often ob- 
tained the victory over my wishes and my resolutions. 
Indolence has been another sin. I have indeed risen 
earlier than I had done for a long time past, and 
frequently taken exercise before breakfast. But I 
have lost much precious time by indolent reading 
what I had no business with at the moment — by 
trifling conversation, when I should have been alone — 
by torturing my mind with despondent reflexions on 
my inability for finding proper thoughts and proper 
illustrations, while I ought rather, trusting in the 
Divine aid, to have made the best of the ideas and 
illustrations that suggested themselves. I have been 



128 



LIFE AND DIARY OF THE 



particularly culpable with respect to committing my 
discourses to memory. I record it to the praise of 
the glory of God's grace, that he did not leave me to 
be entirely confounded before the people, though I 
apprehended this might be the case. But at the 
same time I resolve not to make this an encourage- 
ment to my slothfulness, which would be 6 sinning, 
that grace may abound/ I ought always to have my 
writing so well forwarded that there may be time for 
committing fully ; for when I have delayed so long 
that there has been no time for correcting what was 
composed, I have found it next to impossible to man- 
date, owing to the want of coherence so often occur- 
ring in the style. Alas ! I have here, as well as 
every where else I have been, neglected many oppor- 
tunities of doing good, that will never return. O 
my God, clear my soul from blood-guiltiness, the 
blood of souls. Purge me throughly from mine ini- 
quity ; cleanse me from my sin. Create also a clean 
heart, God ; renew within me a settled spirit. I 
now commend the people here to thee and to the 
word of thy grace. I beseech thee also to take me, 
thy insignificant worthless servant, under thy protec- 
tion. In all places, whither I go, go thou with me, 
O my father's God." 

" Peebles, Sabbath evening, Oct. 4. — Yesterday, 
having been invited to spend an horn or two with 
Mr Thomson, a young Relief minister just settled 
here, and Mr M'Dermid of the same Synod from 
Paisley, I endeavoured to regard them as brethren in 
Christ, and to wish them God-speed ; and in public 
prayer to-day I was enabled to give utterance to what 



REV. JOHN HENRY GARDNER, 129 

I have reason to believe was not an insincere affec- 
tion for these, and all other disciples of Christ of a 
different denomination from ourselves. To-day I 
lectured from John xiv. 1, — and preached on Rom. 
viii. 30. To both, there was considerable attention 
paid by the congregation. Let me not be proud on 
this account., as if I could attribute it to any excel- 
lence in myself or my discourses ; for how much is 
there in both to provoke God to relinquish both the 
people and me to drowsiness and inattention ? While 
I was preaching, the thought often suggested itself, 
what are the people thinking ? and after I left the 
church, I had extreme difficulty in repressing senti- 
ments of pride and self-exaltation. I look upon 
such thoughts as a vile attempt to share the glory 
with God, as a most profane perversion of the 
awful subjects of religion to the sordid purposes of a 
selfish ambition. Instead of indulging these thoughts 
for a moment, let me rather weep bitterly over my 
deplorable want of spirituality in my own soul, (for 
though I was more spiritual to-day than is usual 
with me, yet all the spirituality I had was scarcely 
worthy the name,) and over my want of compassion 
for the souls of others. I have hitherto been unwill- 
ing to give up my indolence and sacrifice my com- 
fort, my mistaken comfort, for the sake of saving 
myself and them that hear me. Let me give the 
Lord no rest, till he come down like rain on the 
mown grass, and as the showers that water the earth, 
and descend as the dew upon my withered and lan- 
guid powers. My soul cleaveth to the dust — O 
quicken me ! " 

f2 



130 LIFE AND DIARY OP THE 

" Peebles, Sept. 26. — I was called away, while 
writing the reflections proper to my birthday. But 
after returning to my room, I solemnly set myself to 
consider my character and my ways, and especially to 
inquire whether I be a Christian, and if so, what is 
my standing, and what are my attainments ? On the 
whole, my conclusion was, that God has begun a good 
work in me, although its progress hitherto has been 
slow, irregular, and inconsiderable. I tried to simplify 
the question as much as possible, that I might bend 
the whole power of my self-observation in some one 
direction. A Christian, I reflected, is one in favour 
with God. God is infinitely kind, and wise, and 
powerful ; and therefore if he receive any one into 
his favour, he will communicate to him the largest 
share of the best happiness his nature can receive. 
The only true and permanent happiness of an im- 
mortal, is to be one with the Eternal, to enjoy commu- 
nion with him, and (what is indispensable to such 
communion, even were it not of unspeakable import- 
ance for its own sake) to have his will and his cha- 
racter fully and cheerfully subordinated to the will 
and character of God. It was this subordination that 
I made the particular subject of inquiry. Is there 
any such thing apparent at all in me ? Is it habitual ? 
Though resisted by depraved principles and passions, 
is there a struggle maintained in my soul on its be- 
half?" 

" Inverary, Feb. 28, 1830 — Sabbath evening. — 
In the forenoon there were only twenty people pre- 
sent, which made me feel very uncomfortable, not so 
much on account of the carelessness which it mani- 



REV. JOHN HENRY GARDNER. 131. 

fested about the privileges of the Sabbath, as on ac- 
count of the difficulty which I always feel in address- 
ing a set discourse to so small an audience. In the 
evening, the room was, as usual, perfectly full, and 
the people attentive. I preached with more life and 
ease than I could have expected. 

"It is a year past on the twentieth of this month 
since my ^paternal] grandmother's death. During 
that year, I cannot discern any progress I have made 
in following her and others, who, through faith and 
patience, inherit the promises. To the exhortation 
to follow such, is prefixed this other exhortation — 
' Be not slothful.' Sloth has characterised every thing 
I have done, and no wonder then I do not make 
progress in religion. It is two years on Friday since 
I was licensed to preach the gospel, and this is an- 
other anniversary that affords much reason for solemn 
and painful reflection. That I have made some con- 
siderable improvement in the manner of discharging, 
at least outwardly, the duties of my office as a preacher 
of the gospel of Christ, is palpable to myself and to 
others ; but this does not reflect so much honour on 
me for what I now am, as disgrace that I was not 
such, or far better, from the beginning. Besides, how 
little have I done ! How few discourses have I writ- 
ten and preached during these two years ! "When I 
think of any other means of doing good I have avail- 
ed myself of, they seem to amount almost to nothing. 
I believe that rny not having yet procured a call to 
the ministry, is a thing appointed by Him who does 
all things well ; but I must regard it, at the same 
time, as the natural effect of my remissness in the 



132 



LIFE AND DIARY OF THE 



discharge of my duty. If God shall spare me another 
year in his vineyard, or how he shall dispose of me if 
he should, is more than I can foresee. But let me, 
at all events, as a steward of the mysteries of God, 
be found more faithful. Let me turn out the talents 
my Lord has given me, and occupy them in whatever 
way his Providence shall direct, ever looking for and 
hasting unto his coming. And inasmuch as weak- 
ness in my sentiments, my affections, my resolutions, 
my conduct, has been at the bottom of all my un- 
fruitfulness and all my sin, I desire, before going to 
rest, to abase myself before God and deplore my in- 
efficiency, and earnestly beseech him to make me 
' strong in the grace that is in Christ Jesus/ " 

ei Inverary, March 5th. — Bless the Lord, O my 
soul. He has in some measure healed my backslid- 
ings, and loved me freely. * * * * I got better on with 
my writing than I had done for some days. One 
part of my sermon on repentance, that namely which 
relates to those who are very unsteady and fickle in 
their resolutions and amendments, I wrote with tears, 
because it was precisely my own case. I could not 
refrain from speaking of it though it condemned my- 
self, because I must declare the whole counsel of 
God, though I should only thereby show myself the 
greater a transgressor. But may God bless these ob- 
servations to myself, first of all. May sin be con- 
demned in my flesh, crucified with Christ, that the 
old man may be destroyed. give steadiness 
and strength to this weak and wavering mind. 
Stablish, strengthen, settle it. This is a prayer which, 
above all others, I need to offer up. The spirit of 



REV. JOHN HENRY GARDNER. 



133 



prayer has been more habitual with me to-day than 
formerly; at least I have been more frequently in 
the attitude of devotion. Let me bless the Lord who 
restoreth my soul, and doth not permit me to forsake 
him utterly." 

" Shapinshay^ July 24. — Came here last night. 
Had a very pleasant sail of an hour. The people 
whom I have seen are very attentive. that I could 
prize more the kindness which is done me for Christ 
and the Gospel's sake ! I feel that I am but ill suited 
for occupying such a station — deficient in ardour, in 
compassion for perishing souls, in simplicity of object, 
in firmness of resolution, in humility as to myself, 
and at the same time in courage as to my office and 
work, as an ambassador of Christ. I want, too, an 
ability for readily putting together, in a plain and in- 
teresting and impressive form, such elementary and 
practical truths as are best suited to the condition of 
the people here. I want, above all, purity and sin- 
cerity of heart. Had I more of these two last quali- 
ties, I should have more of all the rest. May my 
Divine Master pity the perishing souls here, and his 
hungering and thirsting people, and qualify his weak 
and unworthy servant, as he sees he needs. Though 
I am compassed with infirmities, yet may this not 
impede the word of God, but only afford an oppor- 
tunity for showing that the excellency of the power 
is not of man but of Him — for the power of Christ 
to rest upon me." — " July 28. Yesterday I visited 
the new meeting-house which is building here. It 
seems getting on very fast. May the Lord build the 
house, else they shall labour in vain that build it. 



134 



LIFE AND DIARY OF THE 



May he countenance his poor people in this island, 
whose hearts he has already opened to make such 
efforts and sacrifices for the sake of his gospel. Last 

evening I called for C B , to apologise for 

my not complying with his invitation to dine with 
liim on Sabbath. I told him frankly the reason, name- 
ly, that I wished always, if possible, to keep my 
lodgings on that day. He very politely said that he 
ought rather to make the apology, but that he sup- 
posed I intended leaving the island so soon that he 
might not see me afterwards." 

Sanda, Aug. 29. — When last I addressed the 
throne of mercy, I think I remembered my mother 
and sister, and other friends, with sincere desires for 
their spiritual welfare. But I can never dwell long 
on my friends, without my prayers reverting with 
new earnestness to my own necessities, which seem 
so overwhelmingly superior. It might be an inte- 
resting and important question, whether this be a 
natural effect of prayer for others, or be only the re- 
sult of selfishness. I should think it the former, pro- 
vided the heart still glows with an ardent affection 
towards those who have been the subjects of the in- 
tercessory petitions we have been offering up. Nor 
is it selfishness to regard our own salvation and sanc- 
tification as our first and great work, and that which, 
comparatively speaking, it is wholly within our own 
power to effect. May God make me more in ear- 
nest about this work in the first instance, and I have 
no doubt I shall then be disposed and strengthened 
to teach other transgressors his ways, that sinners 
may be converted unto him." — " Aug. 30. At family 



REV. JOHN HENRY GARDNER. 



135 



worship I was rather more spiritual than jester- 
day. Yet while reading the Scriptures, I was fre- 
quently thinking of the tones of my voice, and mode 
of pronouncing. * * * I have chosen for a sub- 
ject of reflection and a principle of action this day, 
' Our sufficiency is of God,' and have already felt 
some benefit arising from having such a passage as a 
rallying point for the thoughts and resolutions." 

" Kirkwall, Sep. 13. — Saturday was my birthday. 
I retired for a little this evening, for the purpose of 
thanking God for all his mercies of which I have 
been partaker from the womb until now, imploring 
his guidance and favour in future. I must not for- 
get to take a more minute and serious survey of the 
past, the present, and the future." — " Sep. 20, Mon- 
day evening. The solemn review of myself and all 
that is most important to me, I am only now about 
to take. It is twenty-three years since I was born 
into the present world, with the germ of all those 
powers and capacities which are indispensable to ac- 
countable acting and to rational happiness, and which, 
if rightly improved and developed, are susceptible of 
being the instrument of the noblest felicity that crea- 
tures are capable of, in the w r orld to come. Early 
was I cast on thy care. Thou who didst care for 
that helpless and insignificant being I was twenty- 
three years ago, dost care for me still, when a being 
with maturer powers, but a being far less innocent, 
and in innumerable ways far less worthy of thy good 
hand, which thou hast ever kept upon me for good. 
But while I bless thee for my animal and rational life, 
and the sustenance of both, and acknowledge the kind- 



136 



LIFE AND DIARY OP THE 



ness and care that have preserved my health and my 
soundness amidst many risks to which they were ex- 
posed, let me not forget, I beseech thee, that unless 
I have undergone another birth, I am not thy child, 
nor an heir of God, and that thou art my Father in 
no happier or more exalted sense than thou art the 
Father of all creatures, rational and irrational, holy 
or fallen. may the Redeemer's words be engraven 
on my very heart, while I set myself to these solemn 
inquiries, and let them ever remain written there, as 
with a pen of iron and the point of a diamond, 
' Except a man be born again, he cannot enter into 
the kingdom of God/ No more shall I be an inha- 
bitant of the pure spiritual world of which God is the 
light and the centre, whose people are all righteous, 
a blessed and peculiar people, without this second 
birth, than I would ever have been an inhabitant of 
this outward and material world, without being born 
into it. 

" To be born into any new state of existence, is to 
be furnished with the first radical principles of those 
various properties which are requisite for living in 
that state, especially the perceptions, desires, and 
powers of acting which are suited to its peculiar duties 
and enjoyments. Have I then those spiritual per- 
ceptions, desires, and active powers, which are indis- 
pensable to my being a subject of the kingdom of 
heaven, and to my obeying its laws, and being happily 
in the possession of its high privileges ? 

" First, — Evidence of my spiritual perceptions. 
Have I been endowed with any capacity of knowing 
the things of the Spirit of God, or are they foolish- 



REV. JOHN HENRY GARDNER. 



137 



ness to me ? Now may the Searcher of hearts pre- 
vent me from overlooking the real meaning and 
bearing of this question. It is not, whether I am 
able to reflect on spiritual subjects, and for intellec- 
tually taking rational and connected views of them, 
which I can explain and defend, and enforce upon 
the minds of others. Unless, indeed., I were capable 
of all this (at least the first part of it) in some 
degree, there would be indisputable evidence, with- 
out proceeding further, that I am yet a natural man, 
and know not the things of the Spirit of God. I 
would either be stupidly ignorant, or I would be a 
proud and self-sufficient infidel. But neither of 
these characters belongs to me. I have not, indeed, 
that clear, intellectual, well-digested view of Divine 
truth I ought to have. I have been very indolent, 
and often very much prejudiced, in reference to reli- 
gious inquiry. But the object I must keep at present 
in view, is not so much the degree of the qualities I 
am inquiring about, as the reality of their existence 
in my soul. Doubtless I have a capacity, which has 
to some extent been improved, for knowing the truth 
in an intellectual way. Without this, I could not 
converse about religion ; I could not preach about it. 
This, however, is not spiritual perception. It is a 
kind of perception of spiritual objects, but it is cer- 
tainly not in itself a spiritual discernment of them. 
I might see the most glorious object in the natural 
world, the sun, and perceive the effects of his influ- 
ence produced on the whole face of the earth, and 
know the laws by which these effects are brought 
about, and might know also that I myself, according 



138 



LIFE AND DIARY OF THE 



to the same laws, should be undergoing, along with 
all the objects and beings I behold around, such a 
powerful action on my outward appearance, and both 
directly and indirectly on my health and my suste- 
nance in life and comfort. But still all this might be 
merely the effect of observation and inference. I 
might be incapable of any direct and immediate feel- 
ing of the glorious luminary's power. My mind or 
body, or both, would, it is true, be manifestly and 
marvellously disordered, were this the case. But 
that does not prevent me from conceiving the possi- 
bility of such insensitiveness for the sun's light and 
heat, except so far as I reasoned from the analogy 
existing betwixt myself and those around me. But 
what is merely conceivable in a human being, con- 
sidered merely as an inhabitant of the material world, 
is the natural malady of every human being, viewed 
in the light of the spiritual world, until he is born 
again. The natural man may, and often does know, 
by means of reasoning, many of the truths of reli- 
gion ; he can see their connexions with each other, 
and their bearings on the Divine character and 
government, and on the state and character and 
interests of God's rebellious and ruined creatures. 
Nay, he may even distinctly acknowledge the fact, 
that he himself is one of that number, and conclude 
of course that these eternal and momentous truths 
look in all their importance upon him. Still he may 
not directly feel their presence and their power. 
The process by which he has come to the conclusion 
may not have been very intricate, but still it is a 
process. There is no sense of the tiring. So far as 



REV. JOHN HENRY GARDNER. 



139 



the most sacred recesses of his soul are concerned, 
where all the living realities of acknowledged and 
practical sentiments have their sanctuary, it is almost 
completely external to his mind. 

" Let me apply this criterion to my own percep- 
tion of spiritual objects. "What I have written [at a 
previous date] is alas ! too descriptive of the general 
state of my mind. But if the Spirit of light and 
truth has at all shined into my understandings how- 
ever beclouded it may still remain, I am bound to 
acknowledge the infinite favour, and not neglect the 
grace of God that is in me ; which, however far short 
of that which I need to make me what I ought to be, 
has made me what I am. If my deceitful heart does 
not fearfully mislead me, I do know somewhat of see- 
ing and feeling spiritual objects in their excellence 
and their importance. I have often felt as if I were 
in contact with the invisible things of eternity. In 
my meditations on the missionary question, I have 
frequently, though not always, experienced the same 
feeling. In adverse circumstances, and amid disap- 
pointments, I have seen and acknowledged God's 
hand, and perceived that my duty and my privilege 
was to be wholly at his disposing, in a manner I can- 
not think I would have perceived all this, except 
under the enlightening influence of his own Spirit. 
My discernment is yet very weak and very infantile. 
/ think as a child on the things of God ; but I have 
reason to bless his name there is any evidence that I 
have such discernment and thought at all. " 



His account of this accurate and searching review 



140 



LIFE AND DIARY OF THE 



of his own character, seems to break off abruptly. 
The extracts from his Diary now produced, however, 
may be deemed an abundantly lengthened exposition 
of the state of his mind, and of his principles and 
feelings ; as also, in part, of his external deportment 
during his career as an itinerant preacher. The im- 
pression of his character which these extracts are 
fitted to give, might be confirmed by various commu- 
nications with which, in those days, he favoured his 
relatives and friends. Let a slight specimen here 
suffice : — 

In a letter dated " Ellon, Nov. 24, 1828," he thus 
replies to a sister, who had expressed her solicitude 
regarding his comfort: — ei . Your sympathetic lamenta- 
tions over my forlorn situation, ' far north, an hun- 
dred miles ayont the Forth,' amused me mightily. 
Be assured you never saw me more cheerful and more 
at home than I am at this moment. I was in the 
dumps, it is true, for a day or two at first ; but then, 
besides being fatigued and indisposed, I did not know T 
the real character of the north. By this time, how- 
ever, I know there are warm hearts and warm fire- 
sides here, as well as in the kindly south, (far be 

it from me to call it else than kindly.) Mr M e, 

Mr M h, and Mr S s, have all treated me 

with a truly fraternal kindness. May they not in 
any wise lose their reward ! " 

A communication to the same relative, written in 
1829, shortly after he had been blessed with an op- 
portunity of obeying Christ's dying command, con- 
tains the following passage, w T hich discovers his usual 
self-inspection and humility : — " At Stranraer I had 



REV* JOHN HENRY GARDNER. 141 

very little spirituality of mind in observing the Lord's 
Supper. What desperate hearts we have ! They 
will leave no method untried to shut out from its 
due influence on our thoughts and our conduct, the 
love of Him who died for us and rose again. Christ 
died to condemn sin in the flesh. that the sen- 
tence were put in execution upon me, that my old 
man — all in me that is offensive and hostile to God, 
and ruinous to my own happiness — were crucified with 
Christ, that the body of sin might be destroyed, that 
henceforth I should not serve sin." 

With similar frankness he expresses himself in his 
letters to his mother, as appears from the three fol- 
lowing extracts : — 

« Banff, May 11, 1829 — I am quite well, and 
very comfortable. Banff is a most delightful place/' 
After some account of that remarkable town, he adds,, 
ei The only difficulty with me arises from being elated 
and confident after delivering with considerable ease 
and fluency, which, as might be expected, produces 
a very different kind of delivery next time. I felt 
this remarkably yesterday. In the forenoon I lec- 
tured with much pleasure and comfort on Luke vii. 
18 — 23, and in the afternoon preached, with no 
small difficulty, from Acts xi. 26. In the evening, 
however, I came about a little." 

ic Particle, March 12, 1830. — I have reason to be 
grateful in looking back on the month I have spent 
at Inverary. On the whole, it seems a promising- 
station. Gradually the Secession is gaining ground. 
One respectable family after another has been in- 
duced to come and judge for themselves ; and all, 



142 



LIFE AND DIARY OP THE 



I have been told, find us something very different 
from what they expected. Indeed, some of the people 
were so imprudent in expressing their good opinion, 
that I could escape the poison of flattery only by 
reflecting that they were looking for so little, they 
would have been highly gratified whoever the 
preacher was, unless he were, according to the ver- 
biage of our own church, decidedly below mediocrity. 

Mr S is to be there for the next month, and I 

earnestly hope and pray the station may flourish still 
more abundantly in his hand. Though Paul plant, 
I know, and Apollos water, God giveth the increase ; 
yet I believe that the ordinary method of the Divine 
procedure is to work by means of a zeal and activity, 
corresponding in some degree to the proportion of 
good to be accomplished. If, therefore, some success 
has attended my exertions, feeble and cold as, not- 
withstanding the satisfaction the people themselves 
showed, I am conscious they have been, there is rea- 
son to hope that a still greater fulness of blessing will 

accompany Mr S 's labours, which will be so 

much more abundant and energetic than mine. These 
things, my dear mother, I say to you, who will give 
me credit for saying them in the sincerity of my 
heart. I wish you to join in special gratitude with 
me for my being enabled to do what I have done, 
and to implore forgiveness for me that I have not 
done a great deal more, and done better what I have 
performed. Though I had done all it was my duty 
to do, still I would have been an unprofitable ser- 
vant ; and ' who shall stand if thou, Lord, shouldest 
mark iniquity ? ' — if thou shouldest reckon with me 



REV. JOHN HENRY GARDNER. 



143 



for my defects and weaknesses in the discharge of my 
duties ? " 

c( St Margaret' s Hope, South Ronaldshay, May 
28, 1830. — The Lord's Supper was dispensed here 
last Sabbath by Mr Christie of Holm* I was his 
only assistant. There were no week-day sermons, 
except one on Saturday and one on Monday, both of 
which I preached, as also the Sabbath evening ser- 
mon. Mr Christie did all the rest. He is a very 
pleasant man. I feel myself much enlivened by 
meeting with him. I wish I could apply the same 
remark to communion with that best friend, whose 
death we were showing forth. Alas ! how faintly 
and coldly do I remember him who loved me, and 
gave himself for me." 

While, in compliance with the orders of Presbyte- 
ries, he prosecuted his labours, sometimes in formed 
congregations and sometimes at home missionary sta- 
tions, he nowhere confined himself to the public- 
duties of the Sabbath. He discovered a willingness 
to do what he could for advancing the best interests 
of mankind, on any day, and by any eligible means. 
We find him at one time distributing religious tracts ; 
at another, erecting or encouraging a Sabbath school; 
and at a third, addressing a Bible and Missionary 
Association, or taking part in the exercises of a mis- 
sionary prayer-meeting. He alludes in his journal 
to the dissemination of tracts at Inverary, and to his 

* The Rev. Thomas Christie, now a missionary in Upper 
Canada. 



144 



LIFE AND DIARY OF THE 



placing a number on a table in the vessel that eon^ 
veyed him to Orkney, which were read by most of 
his fellow-passengers. An attempt to establish a 
Sabbath school in one of those northern isles, is no- 
ticed in the following terms : — 

" Walls, July 7, 1830.— Preached on the north 
side of Long-Hope in the forenoon, and at five on 
the other side ; at both times in the open air, and to 
attentive audiences, though not very large. At the 
south side, I announced my intention of establishing 
a Sabbath school, and immediately began it with 
fourteen children who were present. I examined 
them on a passage of Scripture in the hearing of the 
people, and gave some idea of the plan to be pursued. 
This is much needed, for the people are very igno- 
rant. May God give it countenance, and accompany 
it with his Spirit's teaching." 

Exercises connected with the cause of missions 
were equally to his taste : — 

" July 18, 1830. — Came to Stromness by sea on 
Monday. John Simpson, my dear friend, preached 
on the Wednesday, which was Mr Stobbs' fast-day, 
and a day of the ordination of newly-elected elders, 
in the forenoon ; and I in the afternoon. Had a mis- 
sionary prayer-meeting in the evening, which was 
very pleasing. Interesting extracts from the Mora- 
vians' Report were read, also Mr Waddell's letter to 
me, and the translation of the Cafrre chief's hymn on 
the Saviour, which I heard Dr Philp read in the 
Assembly Rooms, ^Edinburgh.] We all three en- 
gaged in prayer. John and I told each other of our 
faults in preaching. For my part, I hope I shall be 



REV. JOHN HENRY GARDNER. 



145 



the better for these hints." — " Kirkwall, Aug. 28. 
Spoke on Wednesday evening at a meeting of the 
Bible Society. I got on better than I deserved, or 
had any reason to expect. The motion I got related 
to the facilities opened up by the new French Revolu- 
tion for circulating the Bible in that interesting 
country." 

Among the various services that claimed his atten- 
tion during his peregrinations, he cheerfully complied 
with invitations to visit the sick and the dying. On 
these occasions he felt a laudable desire to form a 
correct opinion of their spiritual state, and to con- 
verse and pray with them in an appropriate manner, 
as is manifest from the following extracts : — 

" Inverary, Feb. 24, 1830. — Was called after eight 
o'clock to see an old man, who is apparently dying. 
He was able to speak a little, but often talked inco- 
herently. From the broken sentences he uttered, I 
fear (O that my fear may be groundless !) that he has 
been looking to his good conduct and respectable 
character for the ground of his hope in the prospect 
of eternity, and that though he has found himself 
deficient in the discharge of his duty, he has yet no 
distinct apprehension of the way of access to God 
through the atonement of his Son. May I be for- 
given, if I have judged erroneously. However, as 
this seemed, on the whole, the conclusion to be drawn 
from what he said, I thought it proper to urge on 
him the utter insufficiency of our best works to re- 
commend us to God ; pointing out to him, at the 
same time, the all-sufficiency of Christ's righteous- 

G 



146 



LIFE AND DIARY OF THE 



ness, and God's readiness to forgive through, his 
atoning blood, and the freeness and earnestness of 
the invitations addressed to the chief of sinners to 
come to Christ, that they may be saved. Repeated 
some of the most plain and striking passages that 
occurred to me from the word of God on these sub- 
jects — prayed with him, and bade him farewell. I 
bless God that I was enabled to say any thing at all 
to a dying sinner that was calculated to promote his 
welfare after death. But, how little compassion 
was there in my conversation with him — how little 
fervency in my prayers for him !" 

u Feb. 26. — Yesterday forenoon I visited both the 

old man L and the lad C M . Was 

enabled in both cases to speak a word in season, and 
with more feeling than I usually speak with. I was 
but too much confirmed in my opinion of the poor 
old man's state of mind, in reference to his sins and 
their forgiveness. He seemed not to know what I 
meant when I asked him, in various shapes, and as 
simply as I possibly could express it, if he had any 
hopes of pardon, and if they were founded solely on the 
cross of Christ. I have heard to-day that he died at 

eleven o'clock last night. Of C M 's views, 

so far as I could see, there was reason to hope well. 
He expressed his dependence on Christ, and his de- 
sire to depart and be with him, where he is. There 
were no rapturous feelings apparent, but I trust there 
was ' peace in believing.' His mother said he was 
now, she thought, reconciled to his departure. He 
expired at five in the afternoon. O my soul, let these 
deaths affect me more than they have yet done ! How 



REV. JOHN HENRY GARDNER. 147 



should I live so forgetful of eternity and so earthly, 
after hearing of two persons being summoned into 
the presence of God so very soon after I had con- 
versed and prayed with them." 

" Kirkwall, July 18, 1830—When at Walls, I 
twice visited a poor woman who had led a most irre- 
gular life. She is confined to bed, and very weak. 
From all I could see, there is much reason to believe 
that she is a vessel of mercy, and a true penitent. 
She wept much when I spoke of Christ's love and 
other kindred subjects ; and, especially during prayer, 
she appeared often deeply affected with a sense of 
unworthiness. The most pleasing feature about her 
is, that she knows the whole of the New Testament 
from beginning to end. I did not mention a passage 
but she at once caught the spirit of it, and generally 
the language, and could evince, by the interest she 
took in it, that it had been profitable to herself for 
doctrine, for reproof, for correction, or instruction in 
righteousness. Her views, perhaps, are not very dis- 
tinct or accurate ; her humility, however, seems so 
deep and sincere, and her confidence in the Saviour 
such, that whatever may be the confusion of her no- 
tions, I cannot but think it will not prevent her from 
being sanctified through the truth, and filled with joy 
and peace in believing. There may be much specu- 
lative accuracy where there is little practical feeling, 
and much correct feeling where there is not a very 
distinct systematic conception of the truth. Christ 
does not quench the smoking flax, nor break the 
bruised reed. It would be to have another mind 
than that which was in his Master, for a disciple or 



148 



LIFE AND DIARY OP THE 



servant of Christ to judge harshly in such a case as 
this. I was somewhat reluctant to go to see this 
person., from the peculiar circumstances in which she 
was placed ; and though convinced from the first that 
it was my duty to visit her, I delayed it for several 
days longer than I ought. I pray God may forgive 
my sin in this. I never visited any sick person with 
more heartfelt satisfaction." 

ie Sanda, Aug. 30.— Visited two sick women. One 

of them, E M , has been confined for twenty 

years. She complained of frequent and severe pain 
in the head, which often prevented her from reflect- 
ing. In answer to a question of mine, what she re- 
garded as the foundation of a sinner's hope ? she said, 
that Christ was her only hope ; and answered cor- 
rectly also when I inquired what Christ hath done 
for us. I did not get much out of her farther. I do 
not know whether it is that I have not the proper me- 
thod of treating sick persons, or whether those I have 
had occasion to visit have been generally reserved ; 
but for the most part, whatever be the cause, I can- 
not ascertain distinctly what are the views they en- 
tertain, and the impression these views have made 
upon their hearts. In some cases I have, I think, un- 
derstood their state of mind pretty well, but in most, 
I believe, it has been the reverse with me. This 
woman, however, said something about her long 
affliction and God's mercy under it, which led me to 
think she enjoyed some measure of real consolation 
under it, and was reaping in some degree the peace- 
able fruits of righteousness. She said, for example, 
that she was very weak, yet Christ would not break 



REV. JOHN HENRY GARDNER. 



149 



the bruised reed. I trust I may say the same thing 

respecting M D , who, from a prodigious 

swelling in one side of her throat, can hardly speak 
a single word so as to be understood. Both appeared 
much affected, particularly during prayer. for 
more tender sympathy for the afflicted, more of that 
mind which was in Christ Jesus, more deep and ex- 
perimental views of religion, more ardent zeal for the 
Saviour's glory in the salvation of immortal souls ; 
and then would I speak with more appropriateness 
and earnestness, and pray with more fervency and 
importunity, than I do at the bed of sickness." 

All his active endeavours to further the best inte- 
rests of men, were enhanced by the charm of a good 
example. From the testimony of others, as well as 
the tenor of his own statements in the foregoing ex- 
tracts, we have much cause to conclude, that piety 
joined with urbanity, gravity and strict sobriety tem- 
pered by innocent cheerfulness, an alacrity in intro- 
ducing or supporting religious and useful conversa- 
tion, reluctance to complain of the treatment he met 
with, a friendly disposition towards his fellow-preach- 
ers, and, in a word, a care to avoid every semblance 
of evil, habitually adorned his behaviour wherever 
he appeared. How sequestered soever the places he 
might visit, and how obscure soever the circumstances 
of the people with whom his duty called him to 
mingle, he showed a uniform solicitude to shun every 
thing in speech and conduct that might tend to injure 
the credit of religion, to create unnecessary pain to 
those around him, to impede the happy fruit of his 
own labours, or to foster prejudices unfavourable to 



150 



LIFE AND DIARY OF THE 



the respectability and success of brethren that were 
to succeed him in the same field of exertion. 

The Christian's attention to his own true interest, 
and his activity in promoting the spiritual welfare of 
others, are closely allied. The subject of this narra- 
tive, from love to the Saviour, and a sense of what he 
owed to himself, joined to the desire of increasing his 
capacity for usefulness in the church, conscientiously 
consulted his own improvement, moral and intellec- 
tual. The passages already quoted from his Diary 
evince his unremitting care, amid his journeys and 
ministrations, to maintain the discipline of the heart. 
With what assiduity he profited by the lessons of 
Providence, and the varied means of advancement in 
knowledge and holiness to which he had access, is 
confirmed by similar evidence. Still, as in former 
years, he cherished those impressions of death and 
eternity which either personal indisposition, or the 
afflictions and departure of others, were fitted to 
make. A troublesome tumour in his tongue, and a 
successful operation upon it, suggested reflections that 
ought not to be omitted. 

" June 13, 1829. — I have for three months past 
had a sore tongue, which though not giving very 
much pain, yet has produced no small anxiety. I 
trust it is nothing dangerous. May it, however, show 
me, by discovering how easily appalled I am by any 
appearance of death approaching, the necessity of 
dying daily, and of finding my happiness in Christ 
and his service, so that to me to five may be Christ, 
and to die gain." — a Gibraltar-House, Edinburgh. 



REV. JOHN HENRY GARDNER. 



151 



Sept. 10. — This afternoon I underwent an operation, 
for the purpose of removing the tumour that has been 
for some time on my tongue. It was performed by 
Mr Syme, surgeon, in the presence of Doctors Belfrage 
of Slateford, and Taylor Qof Auchtermuchty.] The 
pain was not very acute, and I did not feel faint in 
the least after it was over. I thank God for merci- 
fully preventing this complaint from proceeding to 
any greater height, and that it has so easily been (as 
I trust it has been) removed. My God, I am in thy 
hands as the clay. How instantaneously couldst thou 
infuse some deadly influence into my corporeal frame, 
polluting all the channels of life, and drinking out its 
very essence. How easily couldst thou infuse, in a 
particular part, or spread over the whole surface of 
my body, some unintermitting and excruciating tor- 
ment. Bless the Lord, O my soul ! who healest all 
thy diseases, and crowneth thee with loving-kindness 
and with tender mercies. Alas ! there are maladies 
in my soul which no operator, however expert, and 
no adviser, however prudent and experienced, can 
cure. Mine is not so much ' a wounded spirit,' how- 
ever, as an enervated, drooping, and corrupted one. 
My refuge is in ' the washing of regeneration, and 
the renewing of the Holy Ghost.' Let me now apply 
with at least the same earnestness for the interposi- 
tion of the Physician of souls, with which I have 
desired the advice and the aid of those who heal the 
body. O my God, let not sin reign in me ; for thy 
name's glory help me ; make me steadfast and immo- 
vable. May the violent or seductive efforts of depra- 
vity within, or temptation without, be checked and 



152 



LIFE AND DIARY OF THE 



thwarted by the kindly and holy operation of thy 
good Spirit. He knows my frame ; He knows the 
symptoms of my spiritual disorder ; He sees the con- 
nexion that subsists between them all; He knows 
the consequences that will issue from them if left 
uncured. He is the Spirit of love, of infinite love, 
and therefore I would commit my helpless soul to 
his gracious treatment and his omnipotent agency." 

The decease of several esteemed ministers gave oc- 
casion to the following memorandum : — 

u Kennoway, July 10, 1828. — The calls of Divine 
Providence to those who are invested with the office 
of ambassadors of Christ, are uncommonly frequent 
and awfully solemn. Several young ministers have 
been cut off in the very commencement of their career 
of usefulness — Mr Marshall of Kendal, Mr Gray of 
London, and Mr Brown of Dunfermline. Others 
have been removed at a more advanced period of 
their ministry, such as Dr Brown of Dalkeith, Mr 
Black of Haddington, (who died a fortnight after I 
was there,) Mr Boucher of Cumbernauld, and Mr 
Bunyan of Keith. My soul, incline thine ear and 
hear. Shall thy God expostulate with thee in vain ? 
Tear, tear thy affection, however acute the pang 
that accompanies the separation, from all that entangles 
thee in the service of God and thy journey to hea- 
ven. Lay aside every weight ; run with alacrity and 
perseverance the race set before thee ; look to Jesus, 
the author and finisher of thy faith." 

In a letter to his sister, dated Forres, Nov. 22, 
1828, he makes an affecting allusion to the death of 
the Rev. Robert Scott of Burghhead, which perhaps 



REV. JOHN HENRY GARDNER. 



153 



might have been more happily introduced immedi- 
ately after an extract from the Diary respecting him 
quoted above/' but ought on no account to be wholly 
suppressed. After stating a few particulars regarding 
the rapid progress of his distemper, and the state of 
extreme debility to which he found himself reduced, 
on Saturday Dec. 13th, he adds : — 

i( He spoke little or none after this, but seemed to 
fall into a stupor, which probably abated much the 
violence of the pain he formerly felt. He breathed 
out his spirit without a groan or a struggle. There is 
good reason to hope the Lord Jesus received it. He 
was much beloved among his people ; and no wonder 
he should have been so, for his heart was in his work, 
and simplicity and kindness were the leading features 
of his demeanour towards all with whom he associa- 
ted. The sorrow produced by a bereavement so sud- 
den and so awful, you may well suppose, is of no 
trifling or ordinary nature. Mr Stark tried to com- 
fort the congregation by preaching two discourses 
from our Lord's words, ' Our friend Lazarus sleep- 
eth/ This day I had fixed some time ago for visit- 
ing Mr Scott. But what is our life ? What are all 
our projects and hopes ? All vapours ; and in this 
instance how quickly have they all vanished away." 

The reflections that occur in his Journal on the 
death of his grandmother, are expressed as follows : — 

i( On the fourth Sabbath of February 1829, I 
preached at Montrose. On that day, about an horn* 
and a half before going to church, I received a letter 

* Page 126. 

g2 



154 



LIFE AND DIARY OF THE 



from Mary, announcing the death of my dear grand- 
mother, which took place on the Friday morning 
preceding February 20th. The funeral was appoint- 
ed to be on the Monday, so that I could not possibly 
attend. I am conscious I loved my grandmother, 
and yet I did not feel so keenly on hearing the intel- 
ligence of her death as I thought I would. I trust 
that at least the prominent cause of my feeling less 
than I would do in some cases, was her extreme old 
age, united with her happy preparation for the eternal 
world. The present life had become wearisome, the 
grasshopper was a burden. Why should we, then, 
have soiTowed that she was translated to the land of 
love, the region of health, prosperity, and joy ? She 
has found a Father and Friend ; she has seen Him 
in whom, unseen here, we rejoice ; she has mingled 
with the innumerable company of angels, and the 
spirits of just men made perfect ; she has inherited 
the better and enduring substance. Was it not rea- 
sonable, then, to moderate our affliction, notwith- 
standing the loss ourselves sustained. We trust the 
prayers she so often presented on our behalf are not 
lost, but kept in remembrance before God, and their 
answers in store for us in every time of need." 

To these pious notices we may subjoin a similar 
reference to the departure of a young acquaintance, 
whom he saw cause to esteem as a Christian : 

" South Ronaldshay , May 30. — I understand that 

C C 's death was observed in a newspaper 

the other day. I supposed, before hearing it, that 
she was no more ; or rather I ought to say, that she 
had gone to that Saviour whose love was constantly 



REV. JOHN HENRY GARDNER. 155 

her theme during her last illness. How blessed to 
feel assured that one's friends are with Christ, which 
is far better ! that this death may affect her own 
family and all her acquaintances as it ought. My 
dear sister, I trust, will not be unbenefited by it. 
May we follow her in her simple faith in the Saviour, 
and her admiration of his mercy." 

" Iron sharpeneth iron ; so a man sharpeneth the 
countenance of his friend." * We have seen above 
the value which John H. Gardner put on the com- 
pany and advice of esteemed fellow-preachers. At 
all times he was ready to lend an attentive ear to 
good counsel. He alludes to a sermon preached by 
Dr Heugh at the opening of the United Associate 
Synod, and to exhortations privately addressed to 
preachers, in the following terms : — 

" Sept. 10, 1829.— The Synod are meeting this 
week. Mr Heugh, of Glasgow, preached the ser- 
mon ; the text, ' Who is sufficient for these things ? ' 
He showed the importance of the Christian ministry, 
1st, from its origin ; 2dly* from its end • 3dly, the 
means by whch its ends are to be accomplished. — 
Attended several meetings of the preachers who are 
in town. Attended with my brethren the Committee 
of Synod appointed to converse with us this morning. 
The exhortations given were very suitable, and some 
of them impressive." 

In a letter to a relative, of date March 6, 1830, 
he says, " I thank you for your letter of advices 



* Prov. xxvii. 17. 



156 LIFE AND DIARY OF THE 

which you sent me in the end of last year, and shall 
be happy to receive another such when you find it 
convenient. Hints as to the best plans and times of 
studying would be very acceptable to me." — ei Di 

S ," he states in his Journal, " has given me 

some advices on my way of preachings which I mean 
to consider carefully, though at present I do not en- 
tirely agree with him." — In another paragraph he 
alludes to a salutary advice on elocution, administered 
in a different quarter, which he intended to follow, 
whilst, notwithstanding, he felt hurt " at the dogma- 
tical and public way in which the advice was given." 

The conversation of truly pious and intelligent men 
was always welcomed as a feast. a I came yester- 
day," he says, (C from Peebles to Edinburgh ; had the 
pleasure of Mr M'Dermid's excellent company." — 
u Mr S S , preacher/' it is also mentioned, 

came over to Inverary. He remained all night 
with me, and we had some conversation, which 
should not, at least, have been entirely useless. He 
is most devoted to the work of the gospel, and puts 
me to shame by his superior zeal, energy, and forti- 
tude in doing his duty." — " Walls, July 7, 1830. — 
Last month I spent very pleasantly, sometimes at 
Mr Irvine's, sometimes at [Rev.] Mr Stobbs'. I was 
much gratified by seeing Mr Ferdinand Croth, a 
Moravian missionary, who was some time at Strom- 
ness, on his way to Labrador. He spoke extremely 
little English, and had no conception of English 
grammar ; nor did he know Latin or French. Yet 
it was astonishing how he contrived to make himself 
understood, and to understand us. His last words to 



REV. JOHN HENRY GARDNER. 



157 



Mr and Mrs Stobbs, Mr Irvine, and myself, when he 
addressed us severally, on shaking hands before going 
into the boat the last time he was on shore, were, 
' You pray, forget me nicht.' I hope the Lord will 
guard him on his perilous voyage, and give him a 
happy commencement and a successful continuance 
of his labours. He is a young man, about twenty- 
four or twenty-six, not remarkably good-looking, but 
of a very candid, simple, and pleasing expression of 
countenance. He seemed to conceal nothing." 

While journeying from place to place, to sow the 
good seed of the Word, he was anxious to prevent the 
pleasures of conversation from unduly encroaching on 
the hours allotted to study; and, though a great 
proportion of his leisure was occupied in preparing 
his discourses, he reserved part of it for reading. 
We find him accordingly, on various occasions, ad- 
verting to the books he perused, and the benefit he 
reaped from them ; a slight specimen of which may 
be presented to the reader : — 

After alluding to his own efforts in the spiritual 
warfare, he says, " I have been reading some excel- 
lent sermons of Dr Paley, on resisting evil propen- 
sities by the aid of Divine influence." — At another 
time, he thus expresses his esteem for one of the 
ablest productions of its celebrated author : — " Read 
Dr Thomsons Sermons on Universal Pardon. I ought 
to be grateful for falling in with this book, as I hope 
it will tend to give me more clear and settled views 
on the subject than I have hitherto entertained." — 
He adverts also to another publication, in terms that 



158 



LIFE AND DIARY OF THE 



must, in some degree, be attributed to the partiality 
occasioned by relationship : — " I have had the satis- 
faction of seeing at last my uncle's Life of Ebenezer 
Erskine, and of Henry Erskine of Chirnside, and of 
sending a copy to Mr Brown of Whitburn. May 
the Lord prosper this work of my uncle's hand, and 
make it the instrument of quickening many of his 
people to folloAv the faith and patience of those wor- 
thy men, whose character and history he has deli- 
neated ! I sometimes felt, while reading of the Lord's 
goodness to them, what encouragement I have to 
trust in the God of my fathers, and what weighty, 
and solemn, and affecting obligations I am laid under 
to live not to myself but to Him. O that these im- 
pressions were more fixed and more habitual ! " 

He was evidently solicitous, however, to profit not 
merely by intercourse with men and with books, but 
also by the lessons addressed to him in the volume of 
nature. The services assigned to him during his 
probationary course, happened to be so arranged as to 
afford an opportunity of travelling north, south, east, 
and west, and of surveying, to a considerable extent, 
the diversified scenery of the British isles. These 
excursions proved favourable to his health and spi- 
rits ; and it was not without lively interest that he 
beheld for the first time a great variety of objects 
that can never cease to attract curiosity, awaken sen- 
sibility, and elevate the feelings of piety. His letters 
to his friends contain pleasing sketches of several 
parts of the country, noted for beauty or grandeur, 
which he had occasion to see — as the Glen of Delvin 



REV. JOHN HENRY GARDNER. 



159 



and Glenaip. But let one brief specimen suffice, 
namely, an extract from a letter to a cousin, dated 
Inverary, Feb. 12, 1830. After mentioning his pas- 
sage in a steam-boat from Glasgow to Argyleshire, he 
gives the following account of a walk of twelve miles 
over a hilly district, during a violent storm of wind : — 

- e The road for the first few miles," says he, u goes 
through a deep glen, in getting out of which it mounts 
over the top of a heath, which you would think, as 
you approach it, you could never manage to get past. 
The only interest of the scenery at such a season, 
and in such weather, was the grandeur which vast- 
ness and dreariness never fails to be fraught with ; 
and for this quality such a scene is worth visiting, 
even at the expense of being exposed to the ' pelting 
of the pitiless storm.' It may serve to impress us 
with some proper idea of the majesty of Omnipotence, 
and our own littleness and frailty, to be alone in the 
midst of the everlasting hills, and reflect how easy 
it would be for that tempest whose fury they sustain 
and beat back with almost no perceptible injury to 
themselves, to effect our destruction, and that so com- 
pletely, that it would be difficult to find a trace that 
we were there still, or had ever been there." 

Some spots that he visited, owing to the associa- 
tions with which, to him, they were fraught, could 
not be otherwise than peculiarly pleasing and affect- 
ing. It gratified him not a little to obtain a passing 
glance of the place where a venerable man of God, 
and a sufferer in the cause of truth, first exercised his 
ministry. te As the coach stopped," says he, in a 
letter to a relative, " twenty minutes at Cornhill, we 



160 



LIFE AND DIARY OP THE 



had the pleasure of visiting the church and grave- 
yard; and standing on what seems to have been part 
of the foundation of Henry Erskine's church." In 
another letter he says, u I enjoyed my stay at Dun- 
fermline very much. I visited the Old Abbey Church, 
which now serves only as a kind of portico to the 
new one. I saw Ralph Erskine's grave. I was 
shown also an ancient oaken arm-chair in which he 
used to sit, whether in his study or the session-house 
I cannot tell." His visit to Inverness gave him simi- 
lar pleasure : — u Dec. 16, 1828. Found out cousin 
Lydia's, and was very warmly received by herself and 
her husband. Next morning (Saturday) visited old aunt 
Margaret, and her []other^j two daughters, with their 
families. On Sabbath, preached three times in Mr 
Scott's chapel. On Monday forenoon I visited my 
grandfather's birthplace, and entered the house where 
he first drew breath. Now he breathes a purer air, 
and dwells in a house of many mansions. Saw on my 
way back to Inverness the vitrified ramparts of Craig 
Phatric. What were once stones are now light and 
porous substances, melted and run together by what, 
after all, is but a trifling effort of that tremendous 
agency, the full energy of which rolls the heavens to- 
gether like a scroll, and burns up the earth and the 
works that are therein." 

Nothing of the kind, however, seems to have moved 
or delighted him more than an excursion he took, in 
company with an uncle, in the fall of the year 1829, 
to Ireland, the country where he himself first drew 
breath. A small portion of his memoranda, relative 
to this trip, is as follows : — Oct. 6, Tuesday. Left 



REV. JOHN HENRY GARDNER. 



161 



Edinburgh this morning at nine, along with my uncle 
Simpson. We design sailing to-morrow for Dublin. 
The Lord bless us, and keep us. I wish this even- 
ing (may God help me to put my wish into practice) 
to draw near to God, to commend myself, my mother, 
my sister, and all my dear friends, to his gracious 
care ; to entreat him, if it seem good to him, to pre- 
serve us from all the dangers of sea and land, and 
bring us back in safety to our home and our ordinary 
duties ; to make us useful, while we are in Ireland, 
to our Christian friends, and to those who know not, 
or obey not, our Lord Jesus Christ." — ei Edinburgh^ 
Dec. 5. I have delayed longer than might have been 
expected, to write a brief account of my visit to Ire- 
land, considering the merciful providences of which 
I was, during that visit, the subject. I have been 
rescued from the dangers both of sea and land, and 
on the former, from peril by tempest and by fire. 
Yet, how forgetful I am of God's benefits ! My 
uncle S. and I left Edinburgh on Tuesday the 6th 
October, and went no farther than Glasgow that day. 
Reached Dublin on Thursday evening about six 
o'clock. Found our friends Mr and Mrs Waddell 
next day, who were very much surprised at seeing 
us, as they did not expect to meet us till they arrived 
at Monaghan. We spent Friday and Saturday in 
seeing the city, and all that is most remarkable in it, 
as the College, the library of which contains 1 20,000 
volumes. * * * On Sabbath forenoon I heard 
Mr Stewart preach from these words, ' He hath given 
him authority to execute judgment also, because he 
is the Son of man/ He gave evidence of very con- 



162 



LIFE AND DIARY OF THE 



siderable powers, both of argument and of eloquence ; 
of the former, in some remarks that he made about 
the real deity of our Lord, and of the latter in an 
appeal to sinners, in the conclusion, in reference to 
the coming judgment. I preached in his pulpit in 
the evening. Mr and Mrs Waddell went to Mona- 
ghan on Saturday, and we followed them thither on 
Monday, and met with a most warm reception from 
old Mr Waddell. We spent till Friday most happily 
with him and his family. It was here that I saw 
Hope and Jessy, probably for the last time on earth. 
Why should such separations affect us so much as 
they do, at least in such a way ? They ought to 
make us serious, but not sad. They should make 
us think of the transiency of this world, and all the 
good that is in it, even its friendships, and of that 
better world where our friendships shall be renewed, 
to last for ever. My uncle and I reached Belfast on 
Friday evening. Next morning went to Newtonards. 
My heart thrilled when I came within sight of Scrabo- 
hill, which was the first hill I ever saw. I could not 
help thinking, too, how my dear father would feel 
on approaching the place which was the home of his 
heart, when returning at any time from a journey ; 
and I thought, too, of that heart being long ago 
mouldered into feelingless dust. But I thought, too, 
of the happier home where we shall go to him, 
though he shall not return to us. On arriving in 
Newtonards, we went direct to the manse and meet- 
ing-house, and visited every room in the house, and. 
every corner in the garden. After that, we went to 
the graveyard. There was a funeral at the time. I 



REV. JOHN HENRY GARDNER. 



163 



asked the sexton where my father s grave was ; he 
pointed to a certain part of the burying-ground, and 
said it was one of these old stones there. The word 
old was what I scarce expected to hear. And is it 
possible, I asked myself, that the very memorial of 
my father's grave has begun to decay, ere I visited 
the spot for the first time ? I would have liked to 
be alone on such an occasion. Though my uncle was 
with me, I could not help weeping, although I en- 
deavoured, by being as silent as possible, to conceal 
it from him. On the Sabbath, I had the satisfaction 
of preaching the glorious gospel from the same 
pulpit whence my father proclaimed it, and to many 
who heard it from his lips. No earthly pleasure 
could have been greater than the affectionate and 
respectful reception I met with from the people, so 
purely on account of their reverence and love for his 
memory." 

A young preacher's popularity does not always 
correspond with his real talents, or equal the fond 
expectations entertained by himself and his friends. 
This was possibly, in some degree, the case with the 
subject of the present memoir. He seems, indeed, to 
have met with a considerable share of esteem and 
respect in all the congregations, vacant and settled, 
in which he appeared.* Among congregations and 

* We are credibly informed that a certain ruling elder of the 
Secession Church, distinguished for knowledge and ability, having 
happened to hear him preach one Sabbath in Edinburgh, though 
not the city of his residence, pronounced this high encomium upon 
him. Being asked whether or not he knew the preacher's name, 



164 



LIFE AND DIARY OF THE 



individuals who had repeated opportunities of hear- 
ing him, it was generally remarked that his discourses 
became increasingly edifying and impressive. In 
many of the vacancies where he officiated, there were 
groups of individuals with whom he was a great fa- 
vourite,, and who earnestly wished to have him for 
their minister. But owing to the superior popularity 
of some of his brethren, and the determination of an 
all- wise Providence, the majority of votes, in a variety 
of places where he was proposed as a candidate, 
turned out in favour of others. On those occasions, 
though he did not affect an entire exemption from 
the bitterness of disappointed hope, he discovered an 
exemplary meekness and acquiescence in the Divine 
will. In reference to some of these occurrences, he 
expresses himself in his Journal in the following 
terms : — 

" July 24, 1830. — I once had a considerable party 
in Nicolson's Street ; some of the Dunfermline people 
expressed themselves very friendly to me ; it was ex- 
pected by many that I would be Mr Brown's (of 
Whitburn) colleague and successor ; and yet I am 
shut out of all these places. All this was so ordained 
by Him who is the owner of all good, and can do 
what he will with his own. It might have all hap- 
pened to any other as well as to me. If there be any 
peculiarity in my case, it is that peculiar indolence 
prevents me from making the exertions of which I 
am capable, in order to recommend myself to a Chris- 
Iris answer was, " No ; but I have heard enough to convince me 
that he is at once a gentleman, a scholar, and a Christian." 



REV. JOHN HENRY GARDNER. 



165 



tian people, and thus introduce myself into some 
seene of ministerial usefulness. I endeavoured, how- 
ever, to keep down envious, and discontented, and 
unreasonable emotions, and prayed to God to give me 
a real satisfaction in the prosperity of those of my 
fellow-students and now fellow-preachers, to whom I, 
in the pride of my heart, felt assured that I should 
have been at least equal with regard to success/' 

Before the expiration of other two months, his faith 
and patience were tried by new events of the same 
character. To these he particularly refers in the fol- 
lowing extract of an ingenuous letter to his mother : — 

ei Kirkwall, Sept. 8, 1830. — The first piece of in- 
telligence is one which I fear may disappoint you, 
notwithstanding what I told Mary about the doubt 
hanging over the affair. On my arrival here this 
morning, I got a letter from Mr Stobbs, dated 2d 
September, informing me of the result of the Qiieylow 
(Sand wick) moderation, namely, that Mr Buchan 
was called, twenty-one voting for him and six for 
me. Mr Irvine proposed me, and the only other 
elder, Mr Buchan. Mr Stobbs' letter, which you 
shall see, was very kind, I should rather say, very 
affectionate. I endeavoured to look on the matter as 
the arrangement of infinite wisdom, and intended for 
my good as well as that of the church. But I had 
another disappointment yet to bear. At breakfast, 
just after we had been speaking of Queylow, Miss 

P remarked, that she had seen in the newspaper 

Mr Marshall is called to Whithorn. I had in some 
measure anticipated this, but I was not at the time 
thinking of it. To receive such a double lesson of 



166 



LIFE AND DIARY OF THE 



patience and humility by two such pieces of in- 
telligence, coming to me almost at the same time, 
seemed very striking. I cannot help feeling a little 
sore ; yet I was enabled to cast all my care on Him, 
who, I know, had his eye on both cases ; and I do 
not, indeed, recollect of being more reconciled to sub- 
mit to any thing he shall see good to appoint for me. 
Pray, my dear mother, that my proud and foolish 
heart may not draw me away from such submission 
to discontented and ambitious feelings, in reference 
to my situation and allotments in the Church of 
Christ." 

In his reply to the letter just referred to, from the 
Rev. William Stobbs of Stromness, who had shown 
him the most cordial friendship, he displays the same 
Christian spirit. After alluding to the pain of sepa- 
rating from so valued a friend, with whom he had 
once anticipated the pleasure of often taking sweet 
counsel together, he thus continues : — " We have 
one God and Father of all, who is above all, and 
through all, and in us all ; and that consideration 
should in a great degree soften the regrets of distance 
on earth, while it assures us of the blessed hope of 
meeting and dwelling together at last in a world which 
passeth not away. Yet a little while, and if we are 
Christ's disciples, he will gather us into his Father's 
home, to one another, and to himself. O that, in the 
mean time, our anxiety, and ambition, and business, 
were to glorify him on earth, and to finish the work 
he has allotted for each of us to do. for inclina- 
tion and resolution to go any where, to do any work, 
to take up any cross, for the honour of the Saviour 



REV. JOHN HENRY GARDNER. 



167 



and the advancement of his kingdom. Had we such 
feelings and determinations, the very fact of our 
leaving all for Christ's sake would endear us the 
more to each other, and strengthen the hope of meet- 
ing again in the great multitude of them that love his 
appearing. I trust you will enjoy much of the Di- 
vine presence in all your anxieties and labours, and 
have in Mr Buchan a valuable and agreeable neigh- 
bour. Pray, I beseech you, that the same Divine 
wisdom may guide and dispose of me, not so as will 
flatter my ambition and provide for my worldly ease 
and respectability, but as will most effectually tend 
to make me diligent in working out my own salva- 
tion, and saving them that hear me. My warmest 
regards to Mrs Stobbs." 

Whilst the hope of obtaining a call to a fixed mi- 
nistry in Scotland was thus deferred, he had a press- 
ing invitation to cross the Atlantic, that he might pro- 
mote the cause of the Redeemer's kingdom among 
the long-injured and neglected negroes of Jamaica. 
At the beginning of May he received from the Rev. 
Hope M. Waddell, the friend of his heart, a letter 
dated Feb. 1, 1830, containing highly favourable ac- 
counts of his health and comfort, and prospects of 
success 5 and urging him to go out to labour in the 
same field by the first ship that should sail in winter. 
This interesting epistle touched a cord within him 
that was ever ready to vibrate, and led to much so- 
lemn and prayerful deliberation. From his recorded 
sentiments on the subject, it is clear that, provided 
he saw certain obstacles arising from his own consti- 
tution and other circumstances removed, his inclina- 



168 



LIFE AND DIARY OF THE 



tions were decidedly in favour of missionary labour. 
" I prayed to God," says he, u . that he would remove 
this difficulty ; and, if consistent with his will, send 
me to preach among the heathen the unsearchable 
riches of Christ. For when I think how early Pro- 
vidence directed my views to the missionary cause, 
how I have been thrown in the way of persons such 
as Watson, Waddell, and others,, whose society was 
.calculated to keep alive the interest I had begun to 
feel in the great enterprise of evangelizing the world ; 
considering, too, the removal, in a good measure, of 
the obstacles presented to my going abroad, and espe- 
cially the urgent invitation which Waddell has sent 
me, as it were, from the very negroes themselves, to 
whom, at one of the stations, he mentioned my wish 
to come out and teach them — considering all these 
things, I can hardly resist the conclusion, if I desired 
to do so, that God called me to go to Jamaica without 
delay. I think that, on the whole, my simple wish 
is to know what Christ will have me to do, and to be 
enabled to perform his will, whatever it be." 

After an interval of several months, during which 
he asked and received the opinion of an eminent 
surgeon regarding the capabilities of his bodily frame, 
consulted a few esteemed friends, and often revolved 
the matter in his own mind, not omitting earnest 
supplications to God for direction, he wrote a judi- 
cious reply to Mr Waddell at the beginning of Octo- 
ber. He frankly owned his missionary leanings, and 
his aptness to respond to the language in which 
Divine Providence appeared to address him. Having 
noticed the decision to which the new congregation 



REV. JOHN HENRY GARDNER. 



169 



in Sandwick, and the people of Whithorn had come, 
he adds, " It was universally expected that both these 
calls should have been for me. Probably the result 
will show that Providence never designed I should 
accept any other call than that you have conveyed to 
me from the poor negroes." He avows, at the same 
time, his preference for the scheme of churches, in 
their ecclesiastical capacity, sending forth mission- 
aries, gives a cheering detail of the resolution finally 
adopted that same year by the United Associate 
Synod to establish foreign missions of their own, and 
of the measures begun to be employed for carrying 
that resolution into effect, and informs him that he 
had resolved to await the report of the committee in 
spring, and that he could not, at any rate, go out 
sooner than November 1831." 

The design of holding himself in readiness for 
personal service in the missionary field, should it 
seem meet to the great Head of the church to employ 
him in this arduous work, induced him to wish, that 
to whatever other qualifications he possessed, he should 
add what is usually deemed a very desirable accom- 
paniment, a tolerable portion of medical knowledge. 
With a view to acquire this advantage, he resolved, 
with the consent of his relatives, and the approval 
of his clerical friends, to attend a number of medical 
classes in Edinburgh during the session commencing 
November 1830. Having made arrangements to 
that effect, we find him, in a private memorandum, 
adverting to his situation, and recording his pious 
resolutions as follows : — 

H 



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LIFE AND DIARY OF THE 



" Edinburgh, Saturday, Nov. 13, 1830. — I am 
now settled once more in Edinburgh for some time. 
May God's countenance shine upon me in the pro- 
secution of my new and interesting studies. But 
may He effectually preserve me from the temptations 
to which they expose me. I am now in danger of 
neglecting my special duties as a preacher of the 
gospel, in the prosecution of the studies to which I 
am to devote this winter. For the purpose of strength- 
ening me to resist temptation, let me be instant in 
prayer to God for his grace to help me in time of 
need — scrupulously exact in setting apart a consider- 
able portion of my time, morning and evening, for 
devotional employments, and another portion for 
theological study. I must be on my guard against 
a listless, passive, and desultory mode of study. *As 
I have turned my attention to chemistry, mineralogy, 
and anatomy, let me, in good earnest, study them 
with persevering and systematic care." 

The same day that he penned these sentences, he 
addressed the following request to his sister : — " I 
entreat your prayers at the outset of my medical 
studies, that I may make them an important help, 
not a hinderance to my duty as a preacher of the 
gospel. Though, I trust, we shall every day remem- 
ber each other, yet let there be a special intercession 
for each other, and our dear mother, and our other 
near relatives and intimate friends, on Sabbath even- 
ing." 

The following extract of a letter serves also to 
throw additional light on the devotional spirit he 
maintained, the comfort he felt, and the advantages 



REV. JOHN HENRY GARDNER, 



171 



he enjoyed, during this winter's residence at the 
University : — 

" Edinburgh, Dec. 17, 1830. 

Le My dear Uncle, — I have as yet seen no reason 
to regret my coming to town this winter. I have 
opportunities not only of studying, but of improving 
my health, much superior to those which I enjoyed 
in most places where I have been since I was licen- 
sed. I have also a few excellent friends with whom 
I spend an hour now and then in walking, or in con- 
versation in the house. Among these are Mr B y, 

preacher, and Mr J s H n, preacher. I walk 

almost daily with a Mr Cowan, from the neighbour- 
hood of Stranraer, a young man who has finished his 
studies at the Hall, and has lately been received into 
the seminary of the Scottish Missionary Society.* 

" I like all my classes very much. The anatomy 
lectures are uncommonly interesting, as they present 
not merely orderly, systematic descriptions, but a 
great deal of practical information and physiological 
discussion. Dr Knox has gone over the skeleton, 
so far as regards the bones themselves, and he is now 
describing the joints and ligaments. Every step which 
a beginner in this department of science takes, opens 
out to him new displays of that wisdom, benignity, 
and power, by which we have been ' fearfully and 
wonderfully made/ Thus, a minister of the gospel, 
though he should make no strictly medical or surgi- 
cal use of anatomy, might find it of great advantage 
in enlarging his views, both of the evidences of the 

* Now the Rev. John Cowan, missionary in Jamaica. 



172 



LIFE AND DIARY OF THE 



existence of the great Creator, and of the manifesta- 
tions of his glorious attributes, unfolded with endless 
variety, and yet with the most admirable harmony, in 
all the works of his hands. I trust my proper occu- 
pations will not suffer from my new employments. 
TThen I allow this to be the case, I shall be disqua- 
lifying myself for my w ork as a preacher of the gospel 
in one way, under the pretext of the better qualifying 
myself for performing it in another. 

" I have been reading Douglas of Cavers ' Thoughts 
on Prayer/ It is a tract well suited to the present 
state of the Christian world, and the present prospects 
of the Church, as to the conversion of the nations. 
One thing he principally urges is, that we must ex- 
pect more ere we can hope that our prayers should be 
heard to any great extent. that He who has the 
residue of the Spirit Avould pour on us,, and all in 
whose spiritual welfare we are interested, and on the 
ministers and preachers, and Christian people at large, 
the Spirit of grace and of supplications. Then when 
He has taught us to ask more largely, we may expect 
lie graciously intends to pom on us a larger propor- 
tion of spiritual gifts .... Dr Brown has asked me 
to preach either forenoon or afternoon for him on 
Sabbath first/' 

During the course of this winter, notwithstanding 
his attention to medical studies, he preached almost 
every Sabbath either in town or country ; and it is 
evident from several memoranda, that he then most 
carefully sat in judgment on his own appearances. 
With unsparing severity does he often accuse himself 
of great deficiencies with regard to that spirituality of 



REV. JOHN HENRY GARDNER. 



173 



mind, simplicity of aim, and heartfelt concern for the 
welfare of souls, which should characterise every 
preacher of the Word. Nor does he overlook the sin 
of distrusting a gracious God. He laments and prays 
against those desponding and perplexing thoughts that 
were sometimes apt to assail him., in reference, among 
other points, to his bodily health. " I have been at 
times depressed," says he, eC about the state of my 
health, although, on the whole, when I deliberately 
reflect on the matter, I have no reason to think I am 
weaker than I was this time last year, at which time 
I was a good deal troubled with expectoration. Nei- 
ther then nor now, however, have I any pain in the 
chest, and my voice in preaching is generally quite 
hale and clear. Why then am I disquieted or cast 
down ? Let me trust in God. It is well, indeed, I 
should be reminded of my frailty, and number my 
days. It is mercy, the same mercy that has saved 
both my body and my spirit from destruction, that 
does not allow me such a perfect enjoyment of health 
and vigour, that I should be tempted to live as though 
I should live for ever. O that my great concern were, 
not to live long, but to live to God ; not so much to 
enjoy more health, as to devote to the interests of re- 
ligion in myself, and in those around, what measure 
of health I possess ; and that measure is greater than 
what is bestowed on many others." 

We must now advert to a new occurrence which 
happened soon after the commencement of this win- 
ter, and exercised a powerful influence on his useful- 
ness and comfort during the few remaining years of 



174 



LIFE AND DIARY OF THE 



his life. — We mean the call which, on the 24th De- 
cember 1830, he at last received, to the United As- 
sociate congregation of Whithorn. His feelings on 
this occasion cannot be better understood than by 
means of the following memorandum, in which it is 
devoutly noticed, in connexion with other merciful 
dispensations of Providence : — 

" Friday, Jan. 7, 1831. — Thus God has brought 
me to the end of another year r and it has been a year 
marked by much kindness on His part with respect to 
the preservation of my life and health in travelling 
both by land and sea during stonny weather. I ought 
particularly to remember my journey to Whithorn 
and back again in January, my voyage to and from 
Orkney, with my passing safely over the dangerous 
seas that separate island from island. In October, 
also, I was much exposed going to Carlisle presby- 
tery, and again in returning, yet the bad effects pro- 
duced on my health were not of a serious nature, or 
of very long duration. The conclusion of the year 
has been marked by a memorable event, my being 
called, on the 24th December, to Whithorn. My 
mother, Mary, and I, were very much surprised by 
noticing the call in the Scots?nan newspaper on Thurs- 
day last week. On Friday evening I got a letter from 
Mr William Marshall of Girlieston, expressed in very 
friendly terms, and affording me information, on the 
whole, favourable as to the harmony of the call. It 
was not till Monday, however, that I was put fully in 
possession of the particulars it was necessary for me 
to know, in order to make up my mind, by receiving 



REV. JOHN HENRY GARDNER. 



175 



a communication from Mr Robertson of Stranraer, 
who moderated. 

" Now I know not what to do. I have both se- 
cretly, and in conversation with my friends, pledged 
myself, if Providence should permit me, to execute a 
resolution for the cause of foreign missions. I cannot 
know whether I shall be sent out by the Synod till 
its meeting in April, and I cannot well delay announ- 
cing my determination to the Whithorn people so 
long. There are several circumstances that certainly 
weigh strongly on the side of Whithorn ; but whether 
these reasons should decide the question I am now 
called on to determine, is a point about which I am 
not yet satisfied. Let me importunately ask the Di- 
vine guidance, and devote an hour or two frequently, 
for some days, to the serious and cool consideration 
of the matter, that I may view it in all its bearings, 
and divest myself as much as possible of every preju- 
dice and bias. that God may rescue me from the 
double danger of sloth on the one hand, and presump- 
tion on the other ! " 

The circumstances in which he was now placed 
obliged him very soon to determine the question, 
whether he should accept of the call to Whithorn, or 
devote his life to missionary labour in a foreign land. 
He regretted the necessity of coming to a final deci- 
sion on so weighty a point within the course of a very 
few weeks. During that interval, however, he thought 
and prayed much on the subject, nor did he neglect 
the aid of friendly counsel. The result was, that 
whatever doubts and anxieties regarding the path of 
duty had oppressed his mind, he ultimately felt him- 



176 



LIFE AND DIARY OF THE 



self obliged to conclude that he ought, in the mean 
time, to remain at home, and undertake the usual 
exercises for trial, with a view to his settlement at 
Whithorn. 

It is unnecessary here to produce large accounts 
from his Diary or letters, of the arguments and pre- 
possessions by which he was swayed on the one side 
and the other in this crisis of his life ; suffice it to 
state, that now, as on other occasions, u integrity and 
uprightness preserved him," and that his conclusion 
was built on satisfactory grounds. The writer of these 
sheets, whatever interest he feels in the great cause of 
missions, is not ashamed to admit that he is in some 
degree responsible for that determination to which 
his nephew was led. He was pleased to say, in a 
letter to another relative, Cf I asked uncle D — ~'s 
advice, and he gave it very promptly, very affection- 
ately, and very fully and he represents his final de- 
termination as the result of his own deliberations, 
" aided by his uncle's suggestions." These sugges- 
tions, calmly and moderately expressed, referred partly 
to circumstances connected with filial duty that were 
entitled to some consideration, and partly to the deli- 
cacy of his bodily constitution, too sadly apparent, 
alas ! from his subsequent history. It was also can- 
didly stated to him, that notwithstanding his zeal, 
the gifts he possessed, and the native cast of his mind, 
seemed fully better adapted to home service than to 
the work of a foreign missionary. What appeared 
chiefly to influence his decision, indeed, was his own 
supposed deficiency in those high qualifications which 
the responsible office of missionaries, and especially 



REV. JOHN HENRY GARDNER. 177 

of those who go first out under the superintendence 
of any church, indispensably requires. 

It remains, then, to detail, in the concluding por- 
tion of this Life and Diary, the particulars of his or- 
dination, and of his brief ministerial career. 



h 2 



178 



PERIOD IV. 

FROM HIS SETTLEMENT AT WHITHORN TILL HIS DEATH. 

Whithorn is a royal borough in Galloway of great 
antiquity, and beautifully situated in the bay of Wig- 
ton. The inhabitants of that town and its vicinity, 
in common with many other districts in the south- 
west of Scotland, have for ages signalized themselves 
by their warm attachment to the principles of the 
Protestant Reformation, and of Presbyterial order. 
A considerable number of years since, a congregation 
was formed here in connexion with the Secession 
Church. Though at first small, it gradually increa- 
sed, while the great object of the ministry appeared 
to be not a little advanced by the Divine blessing on 
the labours of their first pastor, the late Rev. John 
Smith. 

This worthy man was ordained among them in the 
year 1795, and died on the 24th April 1830, in the 
79th year of his age. For some time previous to his 
death, he was disabled by affliction for the public du- 
ties of his ofiice, in consequence of which his congre- 
gation was supplied by probationers. John Henry 
Gardner was appointed to preach for the first time to 
this respectable community on the last two Sabbaths 
of November 1829. A congregational meeting was 
soon after held, at which it was agreed to apply for 
regular preaching, with a view to call a colleague and 



REV. JOHN HENRY GARDNER. 179 



successor to their aged minister then living ; and at 
the same time to request the Presbytery to favour 
them by obtaining Mr Gardner and another young 
man to preach to them again some more Sabbaths. 
In compliance with this request, conveyed by the 
Presbytery clerk, he returned to Whithorn, and 
preached there on the fourth and fifth Sabbaths of 
January 1830. In the autumn following, a few 
months after the decease of Mr Smith, a moderation 
took place. Agreeably, however, to what has been 
stated above, though the subject of this narrative was 
proposed as a candidate, the majority of the electors 
gave their voice in favour of the other, namely, Mr 
William Marshall. The successful nominee, never- 
theless, having also received a call to Cupar in Angus, 
to which the preference was given, the people of 
Whithorn, soon after the affair was decided against 
them, determined to renew their efforts to procure a 
successor to their venerable pastor, and in conse- 
quence gave a harmonious call, as we have seen, to 
Mr Gardner, on the 24th December that same year. 

The circumstances attending this call were by no 
means discouraging. In a letter to a friend, written 
a few days after full information regarding it had 
reached him, he states some particulars, and expresses 
his own views of it, in the following words : — " There 
were three candidates. At the second voting, Mi- 
ll had 27, and I 40. Only the males voted, 

which accounts for the small number altogether. 
The call was immediately signed by all the electors 
present, and by other members on the Sabbath after. 
It appears, on the whole, an agreeable enough busi- 



180 



LIFE AND DIARY OF THE 



ness, though they were divided in their votes. As 
to temporalities, I must not, I know, c seek great 
things for myself.' Certainly what they promise is 
more than many congregations, equally able, provide 
for their ministers. * * They have subscribed 
what is sufficient to erect a gallery, which is already 
contracted for. Every one who knows about Whit- 
horn, believes that a minister would be very happy 
and comfortable there. I entreat that you will re- 
member me before Him who has ' all the treasures 
of wisdom and knowledge/ and implore that I may 
be kept at every point from following my own incli- 
nations, and seeking my own worldly comfort, instead 
of cordially asking, ' Lord, what wilt thou have me 
to do ? ' The subject presents to my mind some dif- 
ficulties, to the encountering of which I am utterly 
inadequate, unless directed by wisdom from above/' 

These last expressions appear to refer, in particu- 
lar, to the dimculty he felt for a time in deciding the 
question, whether he ought to accept of the call to 
Whithorn, or hold himself at liberty to undertake a 
foreign mission, in the event of the Synod's choosing 
to employ him in that important service. Having 
determined this point, however, in the manner already 
noticed, his thoughts were intensely occupied by the 
solemn prospect of exercising the ministerial office in 
the place to which he had been harmoniously invited. 
In a letter to Mr Brown of Whitburn, dated March 
23, 1831, he expresses a deep sense of his own insuf- 
ficiency, and an ardent desire to enjoy the benefit of 
that venerated father's advices and prayers : — " Never 
before," says he, " had I more need of your counsel 



REV. JOHN HENRY GARDNER. 181 



and your prayers, than when now preparing to enter 
in good earnest on the work of the ministry. When 
I think how little furnished I am in every respect 
with those qualities which are required in its execu- 
tion, I am almost overwhelmed. I fear I have not 
been careful to occupy the talents committed to me, 
and then there is an account to be rendered for every 
one of them. I have been much struck with several 
articles in the 4 Pastor's Manual/ especially Bostwick's 
and Dr Erskine's Sermons." 

Having delivered the prescribed discourses for trial 
before the Presbytery of Wigton, and passed through 
all the customary examinations to the satisfaction of 
that Presbytery, his ordination was appointed to take 
place on the 13th July. 

He felt much gratified by the manner in which the 
people received him on his arrival among them, a few 
weeks before that interesting day. A letter dated 
Whithorn, Friday evening, June 24, 1834, contains 
the following devout and affectionate allusion to their 
kindness : — c ' I have, as you see, at length reached 
the place which is likely to be the scene of my minis- 
terial labours. The people gave me a most hearty 
and affectionate welcome. I have every reason to 
believe that many of them have been as earnest in 
prayer on my account, as they were cordial in the 
expressions of respect with which they received me. 
that these prayers may be answered ! and then I 
shall be less unworthy of their esteem than I now 
am." 

Another letter, written July 14, the day follow- 
ing his ordination, while it breathes a spirit of 



182 



LIFE AND DIARY OF THE 



gratitude for the kindness of Providence in arranging 
his lot, abounds with solemn reflections on the re- 
sponsible office with which he had just been in- 
vested : — 

' ' The eventful day is now over, and I am solemnly 
installed in the high and holy office of the Christian 
ministry. O that I more really felt how high and 
holy the work is which I have undertaken ! To 
speak and act for God — to snatch those who care not 
for their danger, in spite of their own reluctance and 
opposition, from the fearful peril to which they are 
exposed — to enlighten, and guide, and comfort the 
disciples of the Redeemer, many of whom (to use 
Spencer's words) ' Avalked with God before I was 
born ; — these, my dear sister, are no easy or common 
things to aim at. Besides ordinary human frailty and 
insufficiency, I seem to myself to have many draw- 
backs and defects about my character, with regard to 
ministerial qualifications^ peculiar to myself. Every 
young minister, it may be, who has any acquaintance 
with his own heart, feels more or less in this way. 
Yet it is difficult for one not to persuade himself 
(after all the assurance which others give him that 
his experience is not singular) that their diffidence of 
themselves is chiefly the result of Christian humi- 
lity, while his own is that of a melancholy conscious- 
ness of the truth. I remember, however, that with 
some such complaints of their own weakness, are 
mingled confident though humble expressions of as- 
surance that God is really working in them • that 
their characters, however deficient or weak in many 
points, are on the whole new-moulded, and moulded 



REV. JOHN HENRY GARDNER. 



183 



aright ; and solemn appeals to the Master to whom 
they devote themselves, with respect to the purity and 
sincerity of the motives by which they are actuated. 
I may instance Matthew Henry and Spencer. In 
such confidence, and in such appeals, I feel, for my 
own part, hardly able to indulge. It is a reflection 
full of encouragement and consolation, however, that 
it was manifestly never the intention of the Head of 
the Church to have his servants, any more than all 
his ordinary disciples, of one stature and strength. 
On the contrary, Ave are assured that there are ves- 
sels of all capacities, and all degrees of preciousness, 
in the house of God, though all destined to serve in 
their appointed order, and all vessels of honour, 
sanctified and meet for the Master's use. O that He 
who can put the treasure into the earthen vessels, 
would, by doing so in my case, according to the mea- 
sure of grace which he may be pleased to allot for 
me, show that the excellency of the power is of God, 
and not of man. * * * * 

" I have got my half-years stipend, a suit of 
clothes, a pulpit Bible, a new cloth for the pulpit, 
and every thing, in short, which is usual on such an 
occasion. I have much reason to bless that kind 
Providence which has appointed me to so promising 
a station." 

The particulars of his ordination, with a few sub- 
sequent incidents, are more minutely detailed in his 
private papers, as follows : — 

'* Whithorn, August 10, 1831. 

" I was solemnly set apart by prayer and the lay- 



184 



LIFE AND DIARY OP THE 



ing on of the hands of the Presbytery, to the office of 
the ministry in this place, on Wednesday the 13th 
day of last month. Mr Robertson of Stranraer pre- 
sided. Mr Smellie gave the charge, and Dr Taylor 
preached from 1 Timothy iii. 1, — 1 If a man desire 
the office of a bishop, he desireth a good work.' 
The other ministers on the platform were, Mr Puller, 
Mr M f Guffie of South Ronaldshay, and my cousin 
Skinner. Alas, how soon has the impression of that 
solemnity worn off my mind ! O God, whose I have 
said I am, and whom I have vowed to serve in the 
gospel of thy Son, cleanse me thoroughly from mine 
iniquity, purge me from my sin ! O that my ways 
were directed to keep thy statutes ; then shall I not 
be ashamed when I have respect unto all thy com- 
mandments. 

" From my experience hitherto, I have every rea- 
son to believe that my lot has been cast among a 
most affectionate, and, on the whole, respectable and 
pious people. The cordiality with which they re- 
ceived me is very gratifying, considering especially 
the divided character of the call. 

" I preached the first Sabbath on 2 Corinthians 
iii. 5, ' Our sufficiency is of God/ I have since felt, 
repeatedly, what folly it is to think our sufficiency is 
in ourselves. My cousin's text in the forenoon was 
Jeremiah vii. 2, ' Stand in the gate of the Lord's 
house, and proclaim there this word, and say, Hear 
the word of the Lord, all ye of Judah that enter in 
at these gates to worship the Lord.' He preached in 
the evening from c Glorious things are spoken of thee, 
city of God.' I preached the next Sabbath on 



REV. JOHN HENRY GARDNER. 



185 



1 Peter iii. 18, 6 Christ also hath once suffered for 
sins, the just for the unjust, that he might bring us 
to God and began a course of lectures on the Phi- 
lippians. The following Sabbath, Mr Campbell of 
Irvine preached in the afternoon, for the Synod's 
Missions, from Isaiah lv. last verse. Last Sabbath, 
I preached from 2 Peter iii. 11, ' Seeing then that 
all these things shall be dissolved, what manner of 
persons ought ye to be in all holy conversation and 
godliness ? ' 

" My mother was present at the ordination, and 
staid with me until Monday last, when I accompa- 
nied her as far as Stranraer, on her way home by 
Glasgow. Besides it being very gratifying to my 
dear mother to see the people among whom I am to 
spend probably the rest of my days, her presence 
was very encouraging and pleasant to me, and will 
enable her to think of and pray for me in a more 
distinct and earnest manner than she could have done, 
had my situation been known to her only by report. 1 ' 

That he might be capable of feeding the people 
solemnly committed to his charge, with knowledge 
and with understanding, and of u bringing forth out 
of his treasure things new and old," he detennined 
to augment his own stores ; and, in particular, to pro- 
secute biblical and theological studies with renewed 
ardour. His solicitude on this subject, and the plan 
he intended to pursue, may be learned in some degree 
from the following extract of a letter to a friend, 
written little more than two months after his settle- 
ment : — 



186 



LIFE AND DIARY OF THE 



" Whithorn, Oct. 24, 1831. 

* * * "I may tell you in general, regarding 
my studies, that I will find it necessary to make them 
almost all directly subservient to the supplying of the 
weekly wants of my people. I hare been such an 
idler all my life, that I find I require to study almost 
every subject, however plain, before I can get any 
thing to say about it that is worthy of being listened 
to. I told you that I am lecturing the Philip- 
pians. The subject of the next lecture will, of course, 
always serve me for critical study so far every week ; 
but I intend, if I can accomplish it, to study some 
other book, say Romans or Hebrews. Both of these 
epistles I have repeatedly read critically alone. The 
former I read at Foldhouse twice in this way. But 
they are both so rich and so difficult, that ten times 
reading is not too often. What I wish is to master 
one of them so far, that I could venture on a regular 
exposition of it from the pulpit. Probably, however, 
after I have finished Philippians, I shall take the 
history of our Saviour, assuming one of the Gospels 
as a basis, but taking a text now and then, when the 
connexion of the narrative requires it, from the rest. 

u I announced last Sabbath, that I intend (God 
willing) to deliver a series of discourses on the prin- 
cipal points of Christian doctrine, giving one of them 
now and then instead of the lecture. This plan I 
have adopted as much for my own instruction as for 
that of my congregation. One is apt to give too 
much or too little attention to many particular sub- 
jects, when destitute of a fixed plan. My ordinarv 
train of topics, however, I shall continue to select, 



REV. JOHN HENRY GARDNER. 



187 



just as they best suit the state of my own mind, or 
the circumstances passing around me. Spencer's plan 
was to 6 turn every thing into gold ;'■ that is, to im- 
prove every passing event for the edification of the 
people. I have as yet, alas ! wonderfully little of 
this happy art. As I am going along in my series of 
discourses, I wish to read one or two systematic works 
on theology, a kind of reading I have too much ne- 
glected. I have got Maestricht and Turretine, and 
probably I may also have Dwight and Hill. 

w As a kind of relaxation, I mean to revise the 
history of England in the first place, and then, per- 
haps, may take that of Rome. Another object I 
wish very much to accomplish, is the polishing of my 
rusty acquirements in Latin, Greek, and Hebrew. I 
fear, however, I shall have very little opportunity of 
doing so. I have selected Cicero on the nature of 
the gods, for my Latin reading, and may probably 
take some of Xenophon's works for the Greek. 

" If I accomplish the one-half of what I have now 
detailed, and read besides all that comes in my way 
in the form of reviews, magazines, newspapers, &c, 
I shall do better, I confess, than I have ever yet done." 

The life of Matthew Henry seems to have im- 
pressed him considerably, and he had great pleasure 
in perusing the popular Commentary of that excellent 
man. In a letter written January 7, 1833, he says, 
" I was reading Matthew Henry's life yesterday, and 
happened to be at that profound and searching speci- 
men of self-examination previous to ordination. I 
had read it at the time of becoming a minister, but 



188 



LIFE AND DIARY OF THE 



I prize it now as much as ever, and indeed more, 
for I am now better aware of the necessity of some 
of the inquiries he dwells upon, and of the need of 
those supplies of grace which he determines to im- 
plore. I am reading in his Commentary every day, 
and find this a very interesting and edifying exer- 
cise." 

We find the following words written by him in his 
copy of Henry's Commentary : — " Began at the 18th 
chapter of 2 Samuel, November 1 6, 1832, and resolve 
to read at least one chapter every day when at home." 
At the 22d chapter of 2 Kings, however, he has this 
memorandum, " Hitherto I have only read at the 
rate of one half chapter a-day." His intentions re- 
lative to the study of the Scriptures in Greek, appear 
from the following words written with a pencil in his 
copy of the Septuagint: — Cf Jan. 31, ]833. To read 
one chapter of the Septuagint one day, and one of 
the Greek Testament the next." 

Before the close of the year 1832, he drew out, in 
a memorandum book, a sketch of u Employments 
during winter 1832-3," consisting of three divisions ; 
the first entitled, " Congregational business the 
second, " Studies for improvement ; " and the third, 
" Miscellaneous." 

The particulars of the second division, <l Studies 
for improvement," are as follows : — 

" 1. For Devotional Purposes. — English Bible, 
Charnock, Halyburton, Howe's Blessedness of the 
Righteous, Haweis on the Lord's Supper, Boston's 
Sermons and Journal, Pilgrim's Progress, Andrew 
Swanston's Discourses. 



REV. JOHN HENRY GARDNER. 



189 



" 2. Biblical. — Luke's Gospel, Hebrews, Home's 
Sacred Antiquities, Campbell's Dissertations. 

" 3. Theological. — Calvin, Maestricht, Dr Dick's 
Lectures, (my own notes,) Paley's Evidences, Lyt- 
tleton's Conversion of Paul. 

a 4. Literary. — Hebrew Psalter, (every week the 
Psalm I am to explain,) iEschines, Demosthenes, 
Horace's Ars Poetica, Massillon, Cicero de Officiis, &c. 

" 5. Historical. — Hume and Smollet, Mitford's 
Greece ; read M'Crie's Knox and Melville, and com- 
pare with Hume. 

" 6. Political and Scientific. — Edinburgh Re- 
view, Locke on the Understanding. 

" 7* General and Lighter. 

tf Let my other studies be as much as possible so 
arranged, that it shall be unnecessary to indulge 
much in this seventh class. The newspapers, the 
reviews, and magazines, ought to serve in a great 
measure." 

His active exertions for the improvement of his 
mind in scriptural and general knowledge, were not 
allowed to supersede the cultivation of experimental 
and practical piety. His letters to relatives and in- 
timate friends, combine, with his Diary, to give 
abundant evidence of his continued attention to 
prayer, to the personal application of the truth, and 
to impartial self-inquiry. 

a How delightful," says he, in one of his letters, 
" is the thought, that all our affairs are observed and 
managed, and all our vexations and fears sympathized 
with, by that friend who can never be far off, and 
never will cease to care for those who cast their cares 



190 



v LIFE AND DIARY OF THE 



upon him. Alas, that we should so imperfectly re- 
spond to his affectionate and condescending superin- 
tendence, hy so feebly associating the remembrance 
of it, with all our interests and feelings ! So much am 
I convinced of the high importance of thus connect- 
ing every thing with confidence in the Saviour, and 
devotedness of heart to hum that there is no principle 
I urge more earnestly in exhorting the families which 
I visit ; but I do find it fax far easier to recommend 
it to others, than to act upon it myself." 

In a subsequent communication, he expresses a 
humbling sense of his own low attainments in grace, 
and earnestly beseeches his friend to abound in prayer 
on his behalf, that he might become a grow ing Chris- 
tian. C( I feel quite conscious/' says he, " of having 
increased (at least comparatively) in knowledge, and 
perhaps also in the power of communicating it use- 
fully to others. But alas, how little have I grown in 
grace, if at all ! O while you unite with me in grati- 
tude to God for whatever he has afforded me, mak- 
ing his strength perfect in weakness, do not forget to 
implore for me that the Lord would give me more 
grace, and make me more faithful, more diligent, 
and more self-denying. I am not altogether void of 
such experience, as not to be able to agree with you, 
in thinking the ministry a dehghtful as well as hon- 
ourable work ; but alas, I sadly injure both my peo- 
ple and myself, as well as act unworthily of my 
high vocation, by the listlessness of manner in which 
I discharge it, or the unhallowed worldliness and 
selfishness which too often form predominant incen- 
tives to whatever exertion I put forth." 



REV. JOHN HENRY GARDNER. 



191 



" let me seriously preach to myself," he exclaims 
Jan. 4, 1 832, ie the doctrine I taught the people on 
Sabbath, ' The end of all things is at hand, be ye 
therefore sober, and watch unto prayer/" At a sub- 
sequent date, after a minute and searching review of 
his own conduct, and in particular, of the workings 
of his heart, he thus concludes : — ei Wilt thou yet, 
holy and jealous God, be inquired of for these things? 
May I, after such a retrospect, venture 'to resume 
my preparations for speaking in thy name to my bre- 
thren in the midst of the great congregation ? I can 
only do it in the spirit of my text, ' God be merciful 
to me a sinner/" 

After a similar instance of self-investigation, on 
the 22d of the same month, he not only renewed his 
earnest supplications to God to strengthen him with 
all might by his Spirit, but committed to writing a 
few rules of conduct, which he was desirous to ob- 
serve. 

f< The following general rules," says he, " are ob- 
vious. Would that I could keep them, as easily as 
I can perceive their reasonableness and necessity : — 

"1. To make as much of time as possible. 

"2. To do always what is most important, or most 
immediately necessary first. 

" 3. Never to do any thing for amusement, with- 
out a conscientious persuasion that such is the proper 
time, and such the proper means of relaxation. 

" 4. To suffer nothing to interfere with any busi- 
ness with which I am at present engaged, but to carry 
it steadily on till it is finished. 

fi 5. Never to begin the day without prayer and 



192 



LIFE AND DIARY OF THE 



serious reflection, particularly on the duties and temp- 
tations immediately before me. 

" 6. To keep a strict watch over my own spirit, 
in its thoughts, affections, and motives. 

et 7- To associate with every thing in which I en- 
gage, the recollection of my character as a Christian 
and a minister of Christ. 

"8. When reading these rules, to endeavour to he 
deeply impressed with a feeling of my own fickleness 
and indecision, and the necessity of God's quicken- 
ing and establishing grace, to enable me to pay my 
vows to the Lord." 

In conformity with his intentions, expressed above, 
he endeavoured to acquit himself with fidelity as a 
preacher of the word, and to keep back nothing that 
was profitable. He not only discoursed on the lead- 
ing doctrines of the Bible, with a uniform regard to 
a crucified Saviour as their substance and centre ; but 
adapted his instructions to the varying aspect of Pro- 
vidence, and the manifest exigencies of his hearers. 
No sooner, for instance, was the whole country 
alarmed by the appearance of a pestilential malady 
in England, than he pointed out the great refuge to 
which the Christian should betake himself in every 
evil day. A letter to his mother, dated ft Whithorn, 
November 15, 1831," contains the following pas- 
sage : — i( On account of the probable introduction of 
cholera in this country, I preached last Sabbath from 
Isaiahxxvi. 20, 21 . 'Come, my people, enter thou into 
thy chambers,' &c, from which I took occasion — I. To 
speak of the apparently coming calamity. 1 . Of its na - 
ture and magnitude. 2. As to the source from whence 



REV. JOHN HENRY GARDNER. 



193 



it comes, ' The Lord cometh forth/ &c. — II. To speak 
of the call addressed to us. 1. Showing what we are 
called on to do, namely, To cast ourselves on the 
mercy and wisdom of a redeeming God. 2. The en- 
couragement, namely,, ' For a little moment,' and the 
' indignation will pass over/ My own fears on this 
subject are not so great as those of some., but at all 
events, we ought certainly to use every physical and 
religious means of preparing for the worst. May 
you, my dearest mother, experience the true and in- 
vulnerable safety of those who are hidden under the 
shadow of the Almighty." 

He repeated his allusions to the same mournful 
topic, in his new year's sermon, at the beginning of 
1832, and also on Thursday March 22d, which was 
observed as a general Fast on account of the preva- 
lence of this awful scourge. " On that day," he says 
in a letter to a relative who had requested him to 
favour him occasionally with a skeleton of his ser- 
mons, " I preached from Dan. ix. 8, ' Lord, to us be- 
longeth confusion of face,' &c. I made a few remarks, 
showing in what respects even those in the ordinary 
walks of life may find reason of humiliation and repent- 
ance when reflecting upon national sins. I. We are at 
all events chargeable with that inward depravity which 
is the root of all iniquity. II. The many sins termed 
national, are really so in no other sense, than as being 
committed by a great multitude of individuals in their 
individual capacity. III. We are sharers, however, 
in the guilt of those sins also, which are strictly na- 
tional, when we connive at them, and do not use those 
means, which, as citizens of a free community, we 

i 



194 



LIFE AND DIARY OF THE 



might have used for their prevention. IV. We are 
frequently guilty,, in consequence of not being deeply 
enough affected by the dishonour done to God, and 
the injury to our fellow-men, inflicted or perpetuated 
by such national transgressions." 

On the occasion of the election and ordination of 
elders, in like manner, he seized the opportunity of 
addressing appropriate instructions 'to his people. On 
the day of election, February 14, 1833, he illustrated 
the character and utility of the Church, with the Sa- 
viour's relation to, and agency in it, from the symbo- 
lical representation, Hev. i. 12, 13, a I saw seven 
golden candlesticks, and in the midst of the seven 
candlesticks one like unto the Son of man." Shortly 
after their separation to the office, his thoughts were 
directed to the unity that should characterise the 
Church of the living God. ( ' Last Sabbath," says he. 
in a letter to a friend of date March 12, 1833, " I 
preached a sermon on 1 Corinthians, xii. 27, ' Now 
ye are the body of Christ, and members in particular/ 
The subject suggested itself to me in connexion with 
the appointment of new ofhce-bearers in our congre- 
gation ; and, besides, I thought it one very suitable 
to the present time, in which there are not a few 
omens which foretell a union of the various classes of 
Dissenters. I do not wish to have my people behind 
the march of true charity, although I find I must not 
rashly or violently attack their prejudices, but expel 
them as the Israelites the ancient inhabitants of 
Canaan, by little and little." After detailing the heads 
of his discourse, he thus concludes the account : " In 
some of the inferences I spoke of the consoling na- 



REV. JOHN HENRY GARDNER. 



195 



ture of the reflection, that there are members of 
Christ's body in the many communities in which the 
great doctrines of the gospel are maintained. I espe- 
cially urged the necessity of cultivating a spirit of 
candour towards other denominations, and of opening 
our eyes honestly and manfully to those circumstances 
in which they excel our own, as well as to those in 
which we may esteem them inferior to it." . 

The devout interest he felt in this and other mat- 
ters relating to his congregation, appears from the fol- 
lowing entry, dated Sabbath evening, March 3, 1833 : 
— ? I am as indolent as ever. I have been enabled, 
however, to exercise some degree of diligence in re- 
ference to various matters connected with the affairs 
of the congregation, such as visiting the sick, prepa- 
ring my discourses (in some cases at least) with a 
good deal more care than I had been using for a good 
while past, and getting new elders elected. The latter 
business was proceeded in on Thursday the 1 4th Fe- 
bruary, and went on with great regularity and peace, 
for which I ought to be very thankful, as I was be- 
forehand not a little anxious. The persons chosen 
were — , — , — , — , — , — . I hope I made this busi- 
ness a matter of prayer both before and since. I 
think carnal and secular as I generally am, I really 
desired to see men chosen who would promote the 
honour of religion and the interests of the congrega- 
tion. Lord, thou knowest the hearts of all men, 
and therefore I commit the whole matter, in all its 
results, to thee." 

"With the assistance of his elders, he took heed to 
the conduct of the flock, and endeavoured, by scrip- 



LIFE AND DIARY OF THE 



tiiral and prudent measures, to curb sin, and promote 
the interests of religion and virtue. From the records 
of Session, it appears that intemperance,, as well as 
other evils, was faithfully discountenanced and cen- 
sured. 

The administration of the holy sacraments deeply 
interested his pious and affectionate heart. He seems 
to have kept, for his own use at least, a regular list 
of the children he baptised. He records the first in- 
stance of baptism after his ordination in the follow- 
ing words : — " August 29. Yesterday I administer- 
ed the ordinance of baptism for the first time. The 
child was called by my own name, — , — , — , — , a 
son of Mr Henry "Walker, Garliston. May God write 
his own name upon this little child ! " 

Conformably to a general and long -established 
practice in the Secession, the Lord's Supper was ad- 
ministered to his people twice in the year ; and thus, 
during the short period of his ministry, he had op- 
portunity of observing this sacred institution with 
them only three times. On all these occasions, he 
selected appropriate and animating subjects of dis- 
course. On the first, October 2, 1831, he preached 
from Hebrews xiii. 8, u Jesus Christ the same yes- 
terday, to-day, and for ever." On the second, July 
1, 1832, from Galatians vi. 14, " God forbid that 
I should glory, save in the cross of our Lord Jesus 
Christ." On the third and last, in September the 
same year, from Revelation i. 5, 6, '•' Unto him that 
loved us," &c. The following extract from his Diary, 
containing his memoranda and reflections relative to 
this last sacramental solemnity, will serve to show the 



REV. JOHN HENRY GARDNER. 



197 



sincerity of his solicitude for liis own spiritual im- 
provement, as well as the edification of the Church : — 
" Whithorn, Sabbath Evening, 
Sept. 30, 1832. 
" This day the Lord's Supper was dispensed here. 
Mr Robertson and Mr Wood assisted me, Mr Hannay 
having preached on the fast-day. I preached from 
Revelation i. 5, 6. Although a cold which I caught 
nearly three weeks ago has not entirely left me, yet I 
was so well as to feel no deficiency in bodily vigour 
for the services. I have to bless God besides for 
carrying me through them without absolutely disgra- 
cing the ministry of the gospel, and I hope without 
altogether depriving the people of Christ of their spi- 
ritual nourishment ; and yet how much have I to la- 
ment as to the way in which I have discharged these 
solemn duties ! Although I have endeavoured on this 
occasion to cultivate that devotional spirit in myself — 
in which I so much failed on the last occasion of this 
kind, but still more in my first dispensation of the 
Lord's Supper here this time twelve months, and 
which both the labour of preparing for the pulpit, 
and the bustle about the house at such a time, are so 
much calculated to destroy — alas, how superficial 
have been the best affections I have after all been 
able to exercise, and how transient is their impression 
likely to prove ! I was more affected while at the 
table than I remember to have been for a consider- 
able time past. I could not help shedding tears plen- 
tifully when I thought of my many sins and back- 
slidings, both as a Chiistian and a minister, and of 



198 



LIFE AND DIARY OP THE 



the infinite forbearance of the Saviour's love, which 
still permitted rne to take refuge in it as my only se- 
curity, both against the anger of God, and against the 
deceitfulness and plagues of my own heart. let me 
beware of suffering the wicked one to snatch away 
my attainments, or rather hopes, from me once more ! 
Surely by this time I ought not to be ignorant of his 
devices. If I do not deceive myself, I felt sincerely 
humbled as the chief of sinners, and sincerely desi- 
rous that the Saviours gracious power might entirely 
vanquish my heart, and carry it captive to himself, 
and especially mould me as a minister of his gospel 
into a fit instrument for winning souls to him, and 
for edifying and instructing his people. 

" Even already I perceive that vanity and ambi- 
tion are at work in me. I am secretly thinking of 
what improvements I may make in composition, and 
thus render myself more esteemed. Truly I have 
much reason to be more diligent ; but O may my mo- 
tives be purified from all that is selfish and sinister, 
and may my whole aim ever be, so to speak as be- 
comes the oracles of God ; so to explain and enforce 
them as is best fitted for arresting the attention of 
my people, and opening their understandings, and 
impressing their hearts. I have vowed this day to be 
the Lord's only, and wholly, and for ever. I have 
given myself as a thank-offering to him who loved 
me. Let me not then rob him of what he has pur- 
chased, I trust, with his blood, and I have made his 
by a voluntary surrender. Let me pay my vows to 
the Lord in the presence of all his people. I desire 



REV. JOHN HENRY GARDNER. 



199 



to make this resolution, trusting that Christ will- 
strengthen me. Without him I can do nothing, as 
my past experience most wofully manifests." 

His sentiments regarding the importance of a more 
frequent celebration of the Lord's Supper than has 
been customary in the Presbyterian churches, are de- 
cidedly expressed in the following extracts of a letter 
to a friend : — " I am very happy," says he, " to hear 
about the Broughton Place congregation/' (referring 
to their resolution on this point adopted about the 
close of the year .1832,) " and would fondly entertain 
the hope that it is the beginning of better and brighter 
days in our Church. How sadly to be deplored are 
those deep-rooted prejudices, (so rooted that it is al- 
most dangerous openly to attack them,) which lead 
to the so infrequent observance of an institution 
which is the Christian's very food on the path of his 
pilgrimage. He should have it at every stage ; whereas 
he must pass many weary weeks after eating that 
Bread of Life, before he is suffered to sit him clown 
and taste of it again." 

The more private duties of the ministry were not 
overlooked. He felt a real sympathy for the sick, 
the infirm, the aged, the dying, and the mourner ; 
and his visits to them in all probability were repeated 
quite as frequently as the state of his health and his 
other avocations allowed. Although his calls were 
generally short, he had the happy art of suggesting a 
pithy and appropriate remark, and left behind him 
some weighty Scripture to be the subject of future 
meditation. Of the good effects to be expected from 
the frequent visitation and catechising of the flock at 



200 



LIFE AND DIARY OP THE 



large, he was well aware, though perhaps the inter- 
ruptions occasioned by infirmity during his short ca- 
reer scarce permitted him fully to accomplish his in- 
tentions. The list of matters relating to " Congrega- 
tional business," slightly alluded to above, includes 
" finishing visitation and beginning examination." 
In a small composition, entitled, " Notes for Family 
"Visitation, Whithorn, Nov. 7, 1831," we find one 
passage so instructive in relation to this branch of 
ministerial duty, that we cannot withhold it from the 
reader. It is as follows : — 

" THE ENDS TO BE KEPT IN VIEW. 

u 1st, The forming and cherishing a friendly inter- 
course between myself and my people. I must en- 
deavour, therefore, to make myself agreeable to them, 
by conversing for a little on subjects interesting to 
them, and with which they are not unacquainted, 
but especially displaying a kindly regard for their 
welfare. Avoid all controversy with them, and all 
subjects on which I might be apt to attack any of 
their prejudices, except when I think the matter of 
such importance that it is my duty to set them right. 
At all events, let me never be dogmatical or over- 
bearing, and make a continual effort to repress any 
irascible feelings, excited by imprudence or forward- 
ness on the part of any person with whom I may 
converse. 

" 2d, Another important object to be aimed at, is to 
get acquainted with the characters, situations, tempt- 
ations, &c. of the different families and members con- 
nected with my congregation, that I may be able to 



REV. JOHN HENRY GARDNER. 



201 



adapt my public discourses more effectually to their 
capacities and wants, and may be excited to be more 
particular and earnest in prayer for them in secret. 
I must, with, a view to this, take brief notes respect- 
ing the impressions made on my mind respecting 
every family, correcting them from time to time, by 
adding or retrenching, as my increased acquaintance 
with my people may show to be necessary. I must 
avoid hasty and uncharitable opinions, and take al- 
ways the best view of a matter that may appear sus- 
picious. 

" 3d, Instruction is another end of family visitation. 
The Apostle Paul taught not only publicly ', but from 
house to house. In some cases, where I have reason 
to apprehend that the persons are rather ignorant, it 
would be very advisable to make a few plain and 
home-coming remarks on the great doctrines of reli- 
gion. Where I have no reason to apprehend that ig- 
norance exists, it will be better to confine myself to a 
general exhortation on the importance of attending to 
the affairs of the soul, and of each in his own circle 
striving to maintain a conversation becoming the 
gospel. 

" 4th, Direction and excitement as to Christian duty. 
Let me beware (in aiming at this end) of speaking 
as if I suspected any marked failure in duty where I 
do not suspect it. Let me mollify what I say, by some 
such qualification as that of the Apostle, ' We hope 
better things of you, and things that accompany sal- 
vation, though we thus speak.' Or let me do it by 
showing, that however well convinced of our duty, 
we ought to embrace and be thankful for every op- 

i 2 



202 



LIFE AND DIARY OF THE 



portunity of being stirred up by way of remembrance ; 
and however diligently we put our convictions into 
practice, even in that case we need encouragements 
to continue and increase in our activity, considering 
the many impediments to the right discharge of our 
duty, both in our uncrucified corruptions, and in the 
allurements and temptations of Satan and the world. 

IC I ought to be very careful in pointing out, 1st, The 
duties themselves which devolve upon Christians, 
either in general or in their several places and rela- 
tions. 2d, The motives by which they ought to be 
stimulated to the discharge of them. These should 
not be merely the maintenance of our own good cha- 
racter, or because we think it is indispensable to our 
spiritual safety that we conduct ourselves in such a 
manner j but a conscientious regard to what is justly 
due by us to our fellow-men, and especially an hum- 
ble desire to glorify God, by conforming ourselves in 
every tiling to his will. I must show also that these 
motives can never truly influence and constrain our 
hearts, until they come to be under that peculiar 
aspect in which they appear, and only appear, when 
we embrace the pardoning mercy of God through, the 
cross of the Redeemer. And also, that we can per- 
form no duty rightly and acceptably, except God 
work in us both to will and to do of his good pleasure. 

" 5thly, Consolation, where it is required in conse- 
quence of affliction. Stir up my own sympathies for 
the person or family, both on account of the affliction 
itself, and their spiritual welfare as connected with it. 
Endeavour to know, as nearly as may be, the state of 
their minds in reference to it. whether they have any 



REV. JOHN HENRY GARDNER. 203 

real resignation to the will of God, any true impres- 
sion of the necessity of humbling themselves under his 
mighty hand ; and especially, whether they possess 
any solid ground of religious comfort. Both before 
and at the time [let me] lift up my heart in prayer 
to God, that he may enable me to speak to them a 
word in season." 

From the warm interest he discovered in the spi- 
ritual welfare of the young at earlier periods of his 
life, the reader will expect to find, that now, when 
invested with the pastoral office, he was not inatten- 
tive to the same interesting class. With this antici- 
pation his conduct did not fail to correspond. In the 
memorandum relating to c ' Congregational business," 
he mentions " Classes for the Young and we are 
informed that he did frequently meet with young 
people for their religious instruction, divided into a 
variety of classes according to their age and progress. 
His assistance was also cheerfully given to a large 
Sabbath school, consisting of children belonging to 
the various religious denominations in "Whithorn. 
This school, it is stated, was originally opened by the 
Rev. Christopher Nicholson, minister of the parish 
church there, who superintended it during the sea- 
sons of summer and autumn. It being discontinued 
on his part for about six months, in winter and spring, 
the late Rev. Gavin Rowatt took it up during these 
months, and cordially accepted the co-operation of 
Mr Gardner, who, in a letter of date February 14. 
1833, adverts to it as follows : — " We are resolved to 
make a vigorous effort for the improvement of our 
very large school. We have at present about 212 



204 



LIFE AND DIARY OF THE 



scholars, and thirty teachers, fourteen of whom are 
females/' Favourable notice is taken of this school 
in the " Annual Report of the Sabbath School Union 
for Scotland, 1832." * 

Few could manifest greater readiness than he to 
co-operate, as far as practicable, with good men of 
other persuasions, in any religious and philanthropic 
institution. He preached a sermon, by request, for 
the Bible Society of Whithorn, a few weeks before 
his ordination. Mr Rowatt having instituted " a 
Society for Religious Purposes," the chief object of 
which was to provide funds for the education of poor 
children, while assistance might be afforded to any 
religious society the members thought fit to aid, he 
frankly took part with that excellent minister in 
advancing the interests of this institution. At the 
beginning of the year 1832, he established at the 
same time, " Whithorn Secession Missionary Society," 
whose object was the propagation of the gospel at 
home and abroad, in connexion with the United 
Associate Synod. Near the commencement of the 
following year, he says in a letter, " Our congrega- 
tional Secession Missionary Society met to-day. The 
subscriptions for the year amounted to rather more 
than L.ll, 8s. — pretty well to be raised at a half- 
penny a week in so small a congregation." Aware 
of the importance of social prayer in connexion with 
contributions for the diffusion of the truth, he esta- 

* " 118 — Whithorn. The school here, under the superin- 
tendence of the Rev. John Henry Gardner and the Rev. Gavin 
Rowatt, is now attended by 204 scholars." — Sixteenth Annual 
Report, <§-c. p. 43. 



i 



REV. JOHN HENRY GARDNER. 205 



Wished a monthly prayer-meeting, to be held as 
regularly as possible on the first Monday of the 
month. — 6S Yesterday," he says in a letter dated 
March 5, 1833, " I had the monthly prayer-meeting. 
I began a course of cursory expositions on the acts 
of the Apostles. I went over the first half of the 
first chapter." 

Villages where no place of worship exists, and of 
whose inhabitants some are unable, and others un- 
willing, to travel a few miles to attend one, attracted 
his attention and excited his pity. Had the state of 
his health admitted of it, he would have made more 
frequent excursions for the purpose of preaching in 
villages of this description. One attempt of the kind 
he thus describes in a letter L to a friend, of date 
August 31, 1832 : — I preached last Sabbath even- 
ing at the Isle of Whithorn, out of doors, namely, 
in a wood-yard, which was the only place that could 
hold the congregation that assembled. The people 
sat upon logs. I stood on two short and thick pieces 
of wood, close to the end of a house which sheltered 
me tolerably well from the keen autumnal evening 
air. I preached from Isaiah xxviii. 17, ' The hail 
shall sweep away your refuges of lies.' It is the 
first time I have preached there. Mr Rowatt goes 
twice a-year or so. There is no place of worship in 
the village, and it is three miles from Whithorn. 
But alas ! a small part only, I suspect, of my audience 
consisted of those persons for whom such occasional 
services are chiefly needful." 

His memoranda contain repeated allusions to the 
business of the Presbytery of Wigton, some parts of 



206 



LIFE AND DIARY OF THE 



which, during the short period of his connexion with 
it, were sufficiently troublesome and vexatious. He 
thought himself happy, however, in his co-presbyters, 
and mentions them in terms of sincere esteem. In 
assisting them, and his fathers and brethren of other 
Presbyteries, as he had opportunity, in administering 
the Lord's Supper, he felt much pleasure. His pre- 
sence and services were not a little valued on their 
part, and that of their congregations. Having been 
employed to preach at the ordination of a promising 
missionary, born and educated within the bounds of 
his Presbytery, he refers to it in his Diary in the fol- 
lowing words :— " Whithorn, Oct. 3, 1831. My friend 
Mr Cowan was licensed here, at the time of our sa- 
crament, three weeks ago. He was ordained on 
Monday the 10th October at Glenluce. Mr Puller 
presided. I preached. John Simpson was also or- 
dained as a missionary on Tuesday last ; and is also 
going to Jamaica. that their zeal may provoke 
very many to go far hence to the Gentiles. May it 
provoke me to be diligent at home." 

He found himself stimulated to diligence in Iris 
master's service, not only by the example of the living, 
but by various new instances of mortality that oc- 
curred in the circle comprehending some of his kind- 
est and most esteemed friends. 

He seems to have been considerably affected by 
the remembrance of his worthy predecessor, for whom 
he conceived a great regard, from the interviews he 
had with him during the time he spent in his house, 
on occasion of his first visit to Whithorn. The fol- 



REV. JOHN HENRY GARDNER. 207 

lowing account of what passed when he accompa- 
nied Mrs Smith to see the monument generously 
erected by the congregation to commemorate his 
worth, displays a tenderness of feeling, entirely in 
keeping with a sincere veneration for his memory. 
In a letter to a friend of date July 3, 1832, he says, 
" I went with Mrs S. to see the monument for the 
first time. I could not find in my heart to say much 
to her. It seemed as if it would be a kind of sacri- 
lege to break the silence of such a scene. After 
gazing a long time on the beautiful stone, (it is well 
worthy of the use to which it is dedicated,) and on 
the new grave, she turned down towards the lower 
part of the churchyard, saying, 4 1 have still an affec- 
tion for this spot ; • and we went together to the place 
where the body had lain upwards of two years. 
From that she turned to visit the grave of a sister, 

Dr B t's mother. As we went up again, she 

paused once more at the monument, and then appa- 
rently with a great effort bade it adieu." 

In the inscription of this monument, which was 
composed by the late Rev. John Robertson of Stran- 
raer, Mr Smith is characterised as a man who, ic by 
extensive and accurate knowledge as a divine — de- 
voted piety and desire to win souls to Christ — and by 
diligence, fidelity, and affection, tempered by a sound 
judgment, and much practical wisdom in the dis- 
charge of his duty as the pastor of a congregation, 
and a, member of Church courts — made full proof 
of his ministry." Though Mr Robertson was pre- 
vented by the hand of death from fulfilling his inten- 
tion, in wiiting a particular account of this valued 



208 



LIFE AND DIARY OF THE 



co-presbyter, his lack of service has been recently 
supplied by a surviving friend and contemporary.* 
We shall do no discredit to Mr Smith's memory, by 
inserting here the views of his character formed by 
his youthful successor, after enjoying the pleasure of 
his company for a few days, as communicated to an 
uncle a short time after his return to Edinburgh, in 
a letter of Dec. 12, 1829. 

u You have probably heard of my arrival from 
Galloway. I preached the two last Sabbaths of No- 
vember for Mr Smith of Whithorn, who is now so 
unwell that he gets regular supply of sermon. His 
illness is a kind of inflammation in his tongue, which 
is the cause of great pain, and makes it difficult also 
for him to speak so distinctly as to be heard. He is 
rather a singular man, and on first meeting with him 
one scarcely knows what to make of him. But by 
degrees his real character begins to appear, and he 
gained so much on me while I was living in his 
house, that I left him with no other sentiment than 
that of very high esteem and reverence. Notwith- 
standing the pain that he feels, especially when eat- 
ing or speaking, he never once mentions or complains 
of it ; and you would not imagine he was suffering 
materially at all, unless by particular questions re- 
garding his ailment, you force him to explain it to 
you. He is remarkably polite and benevolent in his 
manners, though his appearance is rough. You may 
perhaps wonder why I say so much about Mr Smith ; 

* See " Memoir of the late Rev. John Smith of Whithorn," 
in the United Secession Magazine for October 1835, pp. 445 — 
454. 



REV. JOHN HENRY GARDNER. 



209 



but my reason for doing so was, that I thought it 
would please you to hear so much good of an aged 
servant of Christ." 

Whether the youth or the man of gray hairs be- 
came the victim of death, John Henry stood prepared 
to receive instruction. Having observed a public 
announcement of the decease of a young cousin at a 
distance, he says, Sept. 4, 1831, " Providence has 
given me another warning still; let me remember 
the family particularly this evening in prayer." A 
few months after, he thus adverts to the death of a 
student : — " I read in the newspaper to-day the 
death of David M'Murtrie, one of our students at 
Stranraer, which took place on the 13th December. 
my soul, awake, and watch and pray !" 

Hardly any bereaving stroke, however, could have 
made a more powerful impression on his mind, than 
that by which the Rev. Mr Brown of Whitburn, for 
whom he cherished a truly filial reverence and love, 
was removed from the presence of his relatives and 
friends on earth. His emotions on receiving the first 
intelligence of this affecting event, are expressed in 
the following passage of his Journal : — 

" Whithorn, Sabbath Evening, March 18, 1832. 
— Since writing the above, I have been made a 
second time fatherless. My dear and venerable friend, 
Mr Brown of Whitburn, went to receive his reward 
on Friday the 10th of February, after having been 
struck with palsy the Sabbath week previous. He 
was deprived almost entirely of speech, but not at all 
of thought and recollection. Sometimes he broke out 
in that sweet tone which he used in preaching, say- 



210 



LIFE AND DIARY OF THE 



ing such things as the following — ' the Hope of 
Israel, and the Saviour thereof in times of trouble.' 
— ' My God my glory/ For a day or two he ex- 
pressed considerable doubts as to his state, and said, 
' I fear it is all delusion with me/ In the evening, 
however, Jane heard him saying, ' I'll flee to the 
blood of Jesus, the precious blood of Jesus., as I have 
ever done, and all the devils in hell shall not hinder 
me.' 

" The family appear to have been wonderfully sup- 
ported under a bereavement so trying. They are 
not blind to the many alleviating circumstances which 
accompany it. He had to all appearance little bodily 
pain, and enjoyed almost uninterrupted peace of 
mind, having his heart staid on God. He \fo& fully 
ripe. He had served the Redeemer in the gospel 
more than fifty-four years — had served him with no 
common diligence, and not without much success. 
Why then should Heaven be grudged one of its citi- 
zens,, to whom it might lay so good a claim ? 

" As for me,, alas ! I am amazed at myself, that I 
have been so little affected by this bereavement. I 
am sure I loved Mr Brown as I would have loved 
my own father, had he been spared until I came to 
years of manhood. I am sure I prized in some de- 
gree his affectionate interest in my welfare, and his 
many prayers for me. And I am sure I sympathize 
with Mrs Brown and the whole family in their dis- 
tress. And yet, how easily have I been able to get my 
attention fixed upon trifles light as air. * * 

u But a still more alarming dispensation of Provi- 
dence/' he adds, ff has occurred at my own door, and 



REV. JOHN HENRY GARDNER. 



211 



only last Sabbath. Our doorkeeper, James Roger, 
was smitten by the band of God, just as be had laid 
the Bible upon the pulpit, and never showed (at least 
in a very few minutes after) the slightest symptom of 
remaining life. I cannot but feel thankful that the 
stroke has fallen upon one who seemed to live so- 
berly, righteously, and godly, and with whom I trust 
all is well." 

His retrospect of what passed at "Whitburn, when 
he spent a few days there after the first meeting of 
Synod, (April 1832,) subsequent to Mr Brown's 
death, still farther discovers the sincerity of his re- 
gret, and his solicitude to reap spiritual advantage 
from this interesting event. u Spent part of my time 
in looking over Mr Brown's note-books, and trying 
to acquire the power of reading them with some 
measure of readiness, that (should it be thought ad- 
visable) I might transcribe a few of them for publi- 
cation. I visited his grave alone. It was then I 
felt the thought of separation from him in all its 
reality. To be so near what was once called by his 
name, but what would not hear me or answer me 
any more, gave me feelings on the subject which I 
had not experienced in the same form before. I do 
not know if all the emotions that succeeded were 
those of faith and hope and contrition, but at least 
I trust they were not altogether mere natural feel- 
ings resembling these devotional sentiments. I de- 
plored before the God of my father, whom he so 
faithfully served, the sad misimprovement I had 
made of his affectionate and weighty counsels, and 
the beautiful example which so tenderly enforced 



212 



LIFE AND DIARY OF THE 



and recommended them. I dedicated myself anew 
to that same Master,, whose work he found so exceed- 
ing great a reward, and the full recompense of which 
I at that moment felt, more than ever, to be one of 
surpassing magnitude and glory. I thought of the 
Apostle Peter's words, ( Blessed he the God and 
Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, who, according to 
his abundant mercy, hath begotten us again to a live- 
ly hope.' 

Had the limits of this memoir permitted, a variety 
of extracts might have been produced from the sym- 
pathizing and consolatory letters which he addressed 
to Mrs Brown, and other members of the family, on 
occasion of this afflicting bereavement. We must 
satisfy ourselves, however, with a few sentences from 
a letter to one of his daughters, written a few weeks 
after the event, and a consoling communication ad- 
dressed to Mrs Brown, on the second anniversary of 
her beloved husband's death. — (C Since your father's 
departure," says he, March 13, 1832, u from this 
sinful and imperfect world, in which we are still left. 
I have been looking out and frequently gazing upon 
whatever little memorials of him I have got beside 
me. One of these is his Means of Doing Good, a 
copy of which he gave me in May last. O that I 
could imbibe a portion of the spirit which dictated it, 
and put its principles and recommendations in prac- 
tice, as thoroughly and perseveringly as he himself 
did. Another of the memorials to which I refer, are 
several of the last letters I received from your father. 
I have kept all his letters I think, however short or 
to whatever they related, for I always felt that there 



REV. JOHN HENRY GARDNER. 



213 



was something characteristic in them, which forbade 
me to lose sight of them." 

"Whithorn, Feb. 14, 1833. 

" My Dear Mrs Brown, — I have not forgotten 
that last Sabbath was the 10th of February. I trust 
the Lord has carried you through this trying season, 
and proportioned your strength to your day. 

" When speaking of Elijah's mantle, Matthew Hen- 
ry beautifully observes, that ' there are remains of 
great and good men, which, like this mantle, ought 
to be gathered up, and preserved by their survivors ; 
their sayings, their writings, their examples, that as 
their works folloAV them in the reward of them, they 
may stay behind them in the benefit of them/ You 
will receive along with this a few more sheets of the 
sermons which I am transcribing. They are all 
fraught with the spirit of him whom God has taken 
from our head ; a spirit of simplicity and godly sin- 
cerity. I cannot help adding another remark of Mr 
Henry's on the fruitless search made by the sons of 
the prophets for Elijah ; c traversing hills and valleys 
will never bring us to Elijah, but the imitation of his 
holy faith and zeal will in due time.' Blessed be 
God that we know he is the Lord God of Elijah, the 
God of Abraham, Isaac, and Jacob, and not the God 
of the dead but of the living. Thus we have hope 
concerning them that sleep in Jesus, and hope also 
for ourselves ; let us therefore endeavour to say, the 
Lord liveth, blessed be our Rock ! His being alive 
and unchangeable, is the infallible pledge of our un- 
broken union with our departed friends. 4 We all 
live unto him,' And how then can we say, that in 



214 



LIFE AND DIARY OF THE 



every sense, or in the most important sense, they are 
dead to ns. We see them not, it is true, and listen 
not to their sweet voices, uttering now the language 
of devout affection toward our own God and Father, 
and again that of deep and sympathizing kindness 
toward ourselves, in the horn- of joy and that of dark- 
ness ; but neither do we see our Father in Heaven, 
and our Elder Brother there, in whom believing, ne- 
vertheless, we rejoice with joy unspeakable and full 
of glory. Our religion, while we live on earth, is 
out and out a religion of faith and hope ; the bless- 
ings it bestows, are all either foretastes of what is 
promised hereafter, or pledges of and preparatives for 
the better things to come. Why then should we re- 
fuse the influence of faith and hope in regard to those 
beloved ones whom we can no longer find on earth ? 
It is by faith and patience they have reached the 
better country, where their inheritance of promise 
awaited them. By faith and patience it is that we 
shall ere long (each in his own, and that the best 
possible order) join them. Surely they have not for- 
gotten us. It seems almost too presumptuous to ima- 
gine that those who yet dwell in houses of clay should 
be objects of memory and solicitude to the kings and 
priests of God who serve him day and night in his 
temple, until we remember that our Great High Priest 
himself, the object of their unceasing adoration, thus 
thinks of and cares for us. Surely those who had so 
much of the mind of Christ even here, cannot have 
lost their likeness to him in this respect, now that 
they see him as he is. In the grave, indeed, there is 
no knowledge ; their hatred and their love is lost ; 



REV. JOHN HENRY GARDNER . 



215 



but it is not in the grave that the objects of our affec- 
tion are. There are their mantles of clay, to be re- 
sumed in clue time in a better, and more beautiful, 
and more lasting form ; but it is the unclothed spirits 
that are themselves, and these are ' spirits made per- 
fect' — spirits with whom we have even now much in 
common, and to whom we shall soon still more closely 
(I trust) and more literally come. 

" My prayer for you is, that He who has, during 
the past year, (the most mournful of your life.,) in so 
many ways proved his faithfulness and love, may keep 
you and bless you all your life long/' 

The Rev. Mr Smith, in his excellent " Memoir of 
Mr Brown," introduces a quotation from a letter ad- 
dressed to him by u one who enjoyed no small mea- 
sure of his friendly regard," in which he describes the 
piety and tenderness that characterised the expres- 
sions of Mr Brown's friendship, particularly towards 
young persons, pages 145, 146. Mr Gardner is the 
individual there alluded to. 

The impression which Mr Brown's decease made 
upon his mind, was not only vivid but lasting. In a 
letter addressed to an uncle, February 6, 1833, he 
adverts to that bereavement in the following terms : 
" It will be a year on Sabbath first since Mr Brown's 
death. As we advance in life, how the year gets 
crowded with anniversaries, fraught with painful and 
melancholy recollections ! "Would that they might 
prove more of an arousing and animating character 
than they too generally are. Surely there is much 
that is not only painful, but highly calculated to cheer 



216 



LIFE AND DIARY OF THE 



and encourage us in remembering those who, through 
faith and patience, inherit the promises." 

When the last enemy directed his shafts against 
his own contemporaries in the Christian ministry, he 
felt the admonition coming home with peculiar force. 
Hence on Saturday evening, September 15, 1832, he 
adverts to the death of a young minister, equally dis- 
tinguished for talents and unaffected piety and mo- 
desty, in the following terms : — u Yesterday I read 
in the newspaper a notice of the death of my junior 
fellow-student, Mr Alexander Nisbet of Edinburgh, 
who has been cut off at an age which I have already 
past, and after a ministry even briefer than my own. 
On reading this, my impression was, Let me watch 
and be ready also/' 

The sudden death of another young minister, though 
of a different persuasion, very deeply impressed his 
susceptible heart. We refer to his worthy neighbour, 
friend and coadjutor in the works of Christian bene- 
volence mentioned above, the Rev. Gavin Rowatt, 
pastor of the Reformed Presbyterian Congregation of 
Whithorn, who, after an illness of scarcely three days, 
died there on the 2d November 1832, in the thirtieth 
year of his life, and seventh of his ministry. The 
great esteem he felt for this highly gifted, public spi- 
rited, and amiable minister, is strongly expressed in 
an account of his death and character, which he pre- 
pared for the Edinburgh Theological Magazine.* A 
somewhat ampler tribute to his memory, contained in 
the Report of the " Whithorn Society for Religious 



See Vol. 7th of that Periodical, Pp. 642, 643. 



REV. JOHN HENRY GARDNER. 



217 



Purposes ; " which, was drawn up by the Rev. J. 
H. Gardner of Whithorn, may be seen in another 
periodical.* 

With these public testimonies to the worth of this 
beloved friend., and to the efficiency of his public la- 
bours, his private memoranda fully accord. In his 
Diary he expresses himself as follows : — 

u Whithorn, Wednesday Eveni?ig, November *]tli^ 
1832. — To-day I have been called, in the inscrutable 
providence of God, to do what I never expected 
to do, much less to do so soon. I have followed to 
the narrow house the mortal remains of ray highly 
valuable and beloved friend and fellow-labourer, Mr 
Rowatt. Only yesterday-week I spent more than an 
hour Avith him, talking about a variety of details ; 
one of which was the means of promoting the effi- 
ciency of the Sabbath School. He seemed to me 
quite well, and in excellent spirits. How was I as- 
tounded, therefore, on receiving on Sabbath morning, 
while at Stranraer, a note from Mr Symington an- 
nouncing his death. He had felt ill, it seems, before 
I left him. He expired between one and two p. m. 
on Friday. The Lord pity all whom he has by this 
affecting dispensation bereaved and left desolate. 
May he pity me, whom he has bereaved of a friend, 
whose example and aid and agreeable society, might 
(humanly speaking) have proved of such inestimable 
service to me. to spend and be spent as he. May 
his fervent charity, his unwearied exertion, his firm 
resolution, be my never-to-be-forgotten models. May 

* The Scottish Advocate of Scriptural Principles in Religion, 
Morals, and Politics, No. 2, January 1833, Pp. 79, 00. 

K 



218 



LIFE AND DIARY OF THE 



my life and my last end be like his. His life was all 
activity, his end was peace." 

u Whithorn, Sabbath Evening, Nov. 11, 1832. — 
God has had mercy on me, and strengthened me 
with at least bodily vigour for the discharge of the 
trying duties of this day. I thought, however, my 
feelings would have entirely overcome me during the 
first prayer. The last time I was in my pulpit, my 
lamented friend was in his. But after beginning the 
sermon, my mind got composed, and continued so, 
with little exception, to the very end. I preached 
first, from { Well done thou good and faithful ser- 
vant;" and then from ' Enter thou into the joy of thy 
Lord." I can hardly yet believe the loss I have sus- 
tained. It seems too great and awful to be real. I 
sometimes almost fondly imagine I shall yet again see 
his kind smiling countenance, and go to the Sabbath 
school in company with him. The dread truth, how- 
ever, again forces itself upon me, and I find I am 
friendless and alone. my blessed Lord, to whom 
I have been so unprofitable a servant hitherto, enable 
me henceforth to occupy my two talents with the 
same diligence with which he occupied his five ; or 
bestow on me more grace and strength than I have 
had as yet conferred upon me, and give me greater 
wisdom to use it all. Let me no more please myself. 
Let me no more tremble at the opinion of the world. 
Let me no more be slothful in business, but fervent 
in spirit, serving the Lord. I have now much of his 
work to perform as well as my own. What increased 
activity, then, must characterise me, if I would not 
incur utter failure and shame. Strengthen thou me, 



REV. JOHN HENRY GARDNER. 



219 



Lord, with strength inwardly and outwardly also, 
and then I shall not be afraid of the magnitude of 
the work thou assignest me. 

ei Mr Symington preached, I understand, from 
' Blessed are the dead which die in the Lord.' I 
remember of Mr Rowatt and me conversing on this 
passage after his father's death."* 

Various letters addressed to relatives and friends, 
shortly after this interesting breach, breathe the same 
sentiments of piety and friendship ; of which we give 
a short specimen in the two following extracts : — 

In a letter to his brother-in-law, dated Nov. 5, 
1832, after stating the particulars of Mr Ro watt's 
death, he adds, u He preached Sabbath before last 
for the Sabbath-school, when I heard him for the 
first time, and was very much gratified by having 
enjoyed the opportunity of listening to his clear and 
interesting illustrations of Divine truth. I have lost 
an invaluable neighbour and fellow-labourer. I can- 
not calculate the loss which the religious public in 
our district have met with in the death of one who 
was foremost in every good work. My responsibility 
and labour will now be both very much increased. I 
mean with respect to the Sabbath-school, the Mis- 
sionary Society," &c. 

A letter to his mother, written a few days after, 
supplies a few particulars, which serve to indicate 
the deep and general regret felt at the death of this 
promising minister, hurried to the grave in the full 
career of his usefulness. " My poor friend is buried 

* His excellent father, the late Rev. Mr Rova':t of Penpont, 
died only a few months before. 



220 



LIFE AND DIARY OF THE 



at the back of his own meeting-house. The funeral 
was very large, and the people visibly affected by the 
sadness of the occasion. Some of the Sabbath-school 
children were crying bitterly. All the shops were 
shut." 

The last instance of mortality particularly noticed 
in his journal, is that of Dr John Dick of Glasgow, 
whom he mentions in terms of sincere veneration and 
regret, in an entry written precisely two months be- 
fore his own dissolution : — 

" Whithorn, Sabbath Evening, Feb. 10, 1833. 
— Dr Dick, my venerated teacher, died very sud- 
denly on the 25th January. He had presided at a 
meeting of the Glasgow Anti-slavery Society only two 
days previous. Many of his pupils died before him, 
some of them never being permitted, in the adorable 
providence of God, to enter upon their ministerial 
work ; such as Watson, Fleming, M'Murtrie, &c. ; 
while others of them had just done enough in that 
work to excite the hopes of the Church, regarding 
their long, and happy, and useful career, such as 
Gray, Fisher, Nisbet, Robertson, &c. Did I, under 
his instruction, well digest, as I ought to have done, 
the invaluable prelections which he read to his stu- 
dents, and the judicious observations which he made 
in criticising the discourses ? Have I, since my license 
and ordination, rightly divided the word of truth, like 
a workman who needs not to be ashamed ? Alas ! 
how shall he give in his account of me ; with joy or 
with grief ? " 

In a letter to a friend, written Feb. 14, after advert- 
ing to Dr Dick's sudden death, he thus continues : — 



REV. JOHN HENRY GARDNER. 221 

tc O may all the Doctor's pupils follow him in the 
gravity which becomes Christian bishops, and in that 
beautiful and simple style of exhibiting the truths of 
the gospel, of which he set so eminent an example. 
I try to aim at simplicity and great plainness of 
speech, but often I am conscious of miserably failing. 
Yet I am convinced that the truly dignified style of 
preaching is that which Dr Dick exemplified, in his 
entire reliance for the effect of his discourses upon 
the clear, plain, and well-arranged statement of truth. 
There was seldom any thing like passion in his 
writing, but I do not think there was coldness. Both 
his composition and his manner seemed to me to in- 
dicate a mind honestly wishing to communicate 
weighty and useful instruction. If he had had a 
little more physical energy, he would have been a 
very eloquent preacher." 

Another letter of nearly the same date contains the 
following passage : — u Dr Dick's death must have 
been very sudden. To many young men he has en- 
trusted that precious seed which they will sow far 
and wide, now that he himself is called home to his 
reward. But not a few of his pupils have gone be- 
fore him to the eternal world. Some of them I 
knew and loved well ; such as David Waterston at 
Whitburn, David Fleming, |Tat Drumaird, Kenno- 
way,] Mr Nisbet, and Mr Robertson." 

Touching admonitions conveyed by the death of 
beloved friends, were no doubt heard with the greater 
intensity of feeling, in consequence of the manifest 
feebleness of his own frame. The varied labours 



222 



LIFE AND DIARY OP THE 



and unremitting solicitude connected with the pasto- 
ral office, particularly in the first stage of its exercise, 
were hut ill adapted to a constitution far from robust. 
For a short time before his settlement, he had suffered 
considerably from cold and fatigue, and not many 
months after it, a renewal of similar ailments excited 
his apprehensions. Accordingly, in a portion of his 
Diary, dated Jan. 4, 1832, he speaks of the " warn- 
ings I have got, in the death of several acquaintances 
and relatives, especially Mr Stewart of Downpatrick, 
aunt Margaret in Inverness, and Donald William 
Dewar ; as well as the symptoms of mortality, the 
harbingers of an early death, that have unequivocally 
showed themselves in my own constitution." 

" Mr David Coutts," he adds, " preached for me 
on the third and last Sabbaths of December, and also 
part of the thanksgiving day, which was on the 
Thursday between. His company did me a great deal 
of good, in the way of keeping up my spirits. * * * 
My symptoms, cough, expectoration, and uneasiness 
in the chest, though none of them very aggravated, 
yet have rather increased as otherwise, in consequence 
of which I have, by Dr Taylor's advice, been en- 
deavouring to spare and take care of myself since the 
begimiing of December. I have still gone on, how- 
ever, with my family visitation to a certain extent, 
not finding that I am injured by this duty, provided 
I take it in moderation, and the day be favourable, 
but, on the contrary, I sometimes feel better after it." 

In a letter to his sister, dated Dec. 5, 1831, he 
says, " I thought it my indispensable duty to tell my 
Session the true state of the case yesterday, and I 



REV. JOHN HENRY GARDNER, 



223 



mean on Sabbath first to make a similar statement to 
the congregation, both that I may have their prayers, 
and that they may not think uncharitably of me, as 
if I were lazy, should I abridge my labours. The 
session received the statement evidently with much 
friendship and sympathy, and expressed their wil- 
lingness to provide help for me, now and then, when 
it could be had." His letters to his mother on the 
same occasion, are worthy of his amiable spirit. 
While he regretted the want of her company, he 
expresses his gratitude to the excellent relict of his 
predecessor, with whom he boarded during the whole 
period of his ministry, in the following terms : — 
" Mrs Smith continues, however, to supply your place 
to the utmost of her power, for which I cannot be 
sufficiently thankful to the Author of every good and 
perfect gift. The people were much affected when 
I told them of my illness." After alluding to a letter 
he had addressed to his friend, the Rev. Dr Taylor 
of Auchtermuchty, requesting his opinion and advice 
relative to his health, he thus earnestly solicits the 
prayers of his mother : — " Alas, that these warnings 
of mortality have so little effect in weaning me from 
the hopes of this world, and so little in quickening 
my activity in my Master's work ! O do grant me 
your prayers, that God may spare and strengthen me, 
but above all, that he may sanctify and cleanse me." 

An entry in his Diary, dated March 18, 1832, con- 
tains the following notice of his infirmities, and their 
salutary effect : — " As to my health, Dr Broadfoot, 
and some others of my friends, seem to regard it as 
in a tolerable state, though still requiring care. I am 



224 



LIFE AND DIARY OF THE 



now convinced, indeed, that it is not decidedly worse 
than it was during last summer. But, at all events, 
whatever ground there was for solicitude on this head 
then, it continues unahated still. I have a frame of 
very delicate texture, which may unexpectedly give 
way, for any thing I can foresee. Possibly, however, 
God may intend many days for me in the land of 
the living, and only lets me feel my weakness at 
present, that I may be thoroughly roused to work 
while it is called to-day. His chastisement, I trust, 
has not been utterly useless. It has made me some- 
what more diligent in calling for my people in private. 
Its influence, however, has (with respect to my 
heart at least) been, after all, very slight. O my 
God, I ask not of thee to spare me that I may re- 
cover strength, if this be not consistent with thy wise 
designs. I know thou hast many and far fitter in- 
struments thou couldst employ in my stead, though 
thou shouldst instantly remove me from the field of 
operation in which I act so reluctantly and slothfully. 
I know that, in point of justice, thou mightst say to 
me, ' Thou mayest be no longer steward.' But, O 
Father of mercies, save me from my own heart's lusts. 
Save me from the power of my spiritual foes. let 
me not perish utterly. To whom can I go ? Lord, 
I may have deceived myself hitherto, in imagining I 
had fled for refuge to thy mercy. Yet I will venture 
to flee once more. Never had I more need. O shut 
me not out now. I am fit fuel, I confess, for thine 
everlasting wrath ; yet pluck me as a brand out of 
the burning." 

His session and congregation tenderly sympathized 



REV. JOHN HENRY GARDNER. 225 

with him in his ailments, and pretty frequently ob- 
tained preachers, during the course of this winter, to 
relieve him from the labours of the pulpit. In com- 
pliance with the urgent advice of a medical man, to 
whose friendship he was much indebted, they farther 
consented to his taking a journey northward, as soon 
as the weather permitted, and spending five or six 
weeks of nearly complete relaxation among his rela- 
tives and friends. Part of this season of comparative 
repose was spent at Kennoway, where, agreeably to 
the arrangement, he also gave some assistance to his 
uncle in the administration of the Lord's Supper on 
the last Sabbath of May. His services on that occa- 
sion were marked not only by talent, but by a pecu- 
liar solemnity of manner, as was observed particu- 
larly on the Sabbath evening, when he preached a 
most impressive sermon from Philippians, i. 23, 
u Having a desire to depart, and to be with Christ, 
which is far better." 

By the kindness of Providence, he reached home 
on the Thursday before the second Sabbath of June, 
in an improved state of health, and with much ala- 
crity resumed his pastoral efforts. Besides adminis- 
tering the Lord's Supper to his people on the first 
Sabbath of July, and assisting four or five brethren 
of his Presbytery in the services of the same solem- 
nity, he continued to perform the various duties of 
the ministry, public and private, with little or no in- 
terruption, till shortly after the death of his friend, 
Mr E-owatt. On the 24th December, owing to re- 
peated fatigue and exposure, he was seized with 
inflammation of the throat, which for some time wore 

K 2 



226 



LIFE AND DIARY OP THE 



a threatening aspect, and prevented him for three 
Sabbaths from appearing in the pnlpit. 

" It is of the Lord's mercies," he says in his Jour- 
nal, Tuesday morning, December 25, 1832, " I am 
not consumed. Why should a living man complain ? 
My affliction has been much gentler than in the case 
of many others similarly affected. Besides, I have 
every comfort, and a most kind and affectionate 
nurse, and many to offer prayers every day on my 
behalf. I have not been so much engaged in hum- 
bling myself before God as I ought. On Sabbath 
evening, I was much affected, however, in thinking 
of my need of chastisement, and the various ways in 
which God has already chastised me, but (owing to 
my own obstinacy) with very little effect. my 
God, help me to exercise patience, and then do thou 
with me whatever seems good in thy sight. Only let 
it be good for me that I am afflicted ; let me learn 
thereby thy holy law." In some following entries, 
he laments his fretfulness and other sins, praises God 
for the recovering goodness again shown him, and for 
all the mercies of the year 1832, now come to a close, 
and expresses ardent gratitude to those who attended 
him during his illness, as well as unaffected surprise 
at the interest generally felt in his welfare by the in- 
habitants of Whithorn. 

" Thursday evenings December 27, 1832. — I am 
still confined to my room. Let me patiently humble 
myself under God's mighty hand, and in due time he 
will exalt me. I have been often guilty of both feel- 
ing and speaking hastily and peevishly, which I am 
sorry for. The people are most attentive in their 



REV. JOHN HENRY GARDNER. 227 

inquiries, as well as many not at all connected with 
our congregation. Surely I had no good reason to 
expect, from my general character, nor the way in 
which I have discharged my public duties, that the 
interest felt and expressed regarding my present ill- 
ness would have been what it is. I have been in 
great danger of being lifted up with pride, and yet, 
on the other hand, I can hardly help shedding tears 
for very shame at the respect and kindness displayed 
towards me. Let me be encouraged by the know- 
ledge I have thus acquired, however, to greater dili- 
gence and boldness in the work of Christ, should it 
seem good to Him to restore me to the labours of his 
vineyard." 

" Monday Evening, December 31. — Yesterday, 
Mr Hannay preached to my people from Ephesians 
i. 6, ' He hath made us accepted in the Beloved.' — 
1832 is just about to close. I am not able at pre- 
sent to reflect closely and consecutively enough, to 
take an accurate survey of all the mercies I have re- 
ceived, and the sins I have committed ; but of this 
I am convinced at the slightest glance, that both are 
more in number than the sand on the sea-shore. O 
Lord, if thou hast any use for so unprofitable a ser- 
vant during another year, I look to thee for all the 
help and grace which I will need, to enable me to 
watch, and pray, and labour more abundantly than 
I have hitherto done." 

" Whithorn, Tuesday Evening, January 1, 1833. 
— God has graciously marked the beginning of this 
year with a token of his goodness, and forbearance, 
and long-suffering. Would that I were as sure of its 



228 



LIFE AND DIARY OF THE 



being a token of fatherly favour ! I rested well last 
night, and feel much relieved both of pain in the 
throat and the accompanying sickness. The mercy 
is enhanced in value by the joy it has occasioned to 
those kind friends who have so unweariedly waited 
upon me during my illness — Mrs Smith, Miss Han- 
nay, and Ritchie Kelly. How shall I ever repay 
them ? But I trust they shall in no wise lose their 
reward. 

" Mr Nicholson called for me this afternoon, which 
is one happy result of my indisposition. May God 
grant me wisdom to improve, in a prudent and 
Christian manner, the intercourse with him, of which 
his present kindness is likely to be but the begin- 
ning." 

Letters addressed to relatives during this affliction, 
and soon after its removal, manifest a becoming con- 
cern to profit by the rod, and by the Lord's deliver- 
ing mercy. Thus, in one dated December 27, 1832, 
after stating the particulars of his illness, and men- 
tioning the great kindness of those around him, he 
continues — " I am afraid I am too anxious about 
getting better ; more so than about receiving wisdom 
from the rod and reproof. One thing I trust I have 
in some measure learned, namely, that a much higher 
rate of religion than we generally aim at, is necessary 
to support the mind in perfect peace in the day of 
affliction. I feel my mind so carnal, so little habi- 
tuated to close and spiritual intercourse with heaven, 
that my time often hangs heavy on my hand when 
I am not able to read, and have no person to talk to 
me. could I in good earnest set myself to the 



REV. JOHN HENRY GARDNER. 



229 



prosecution of higher things — of a more vigorous faith 
in unseen realities — of a more sensitive recollection 
of God's presence and holiness — and of a more lively 
and child-like trust in him — then might I rejoice 
that I have been afflicted, and glory in tribulations. 
I shall not look back with a grudge on the pain of 
the furnace, if any sensible portion of the dross and 
tin shall prove to have been taken away by Him who 
now sits as a refiner over me." 

Writing to his brother-in-law, January 22, 1833,, 
he says — ic I write only a short and hurried letter to 
inform you that I am now in my ordinary state of 
health. Blessed be God who has redeemed my life 
from destruction, and healed my diseases ! — I preach- 
ed Sabbath before last without being the worse for it. 
By the end of last week, I felt quite well, and got 
through the work of the Sabbath with as little fatigue, 
perhaps, as I ever remember to have felt. I was 
quite able to read a good part of the evening to Mrs 
Smith, who was not very able to read for herself. I 
have no intention, however, of throwing aside a mo- 
derate care of my health during the winter season. 
It is a blessing too precious, and too precarious, to 
put to unnecessary peril." 

In a letter to the younger of his two uncles in the 
ministry, of date February 6, 1833, referring both to 
his own late indisposition, and a severe illness from 
which that relative also had been mercifully reco- 
vered, he makes the following remarks on the wise 
and salutary purposes which the afflictions of minis- 
ters are fitted to serve : — 

" Ministers have perhaps more need of chastise- 



230 



LIFE AND DIARY OF THE 



ment than other Christians. There is that in our 
office which, if it do not produce in us a higher and 
purer tone of devout sentiment than is experienced 
by the average of ordinary Christians, is but too 
likely to have quite the opposite effect, and sink us 
in this respect even below the ordinary level. I 
ought not, indeed., to measure my fathers and bre- 
thren by myself; but I think I can gather as much 
as I have now expressed from what I have heard and 
read of the mental history of pious ministers. Surely 
if that which is so good in itself may be made, 
not death indeed, but a source of much evil and dis- 
comfort to us, through our liability to neglect to im- 
prove and follow up our high advantage, in being 
always conversant with the business of eternity in 
one way or other, — it is safe for ourselves, and a 
proof of tender care and wise judgment on the part 
of our Divine Master, that we should not escape our 
own full share, at least, of the sorrows and afflictions 
of this present evil world. We need such shocks at 
times, to break up that false tranquillity which so 
easily steals over the mind, when every day employed 
about the service of God and the spiritual improve- 
ment of mankind. They remind us of what we are 
so ready to lose sight of — the reality of religion, as 
a thing that as nearly concerns us as any of our 
hearers." 

About this time also, he resumed his much-loved 
work of teaching the young. " I have been doing," 
says he, Sabbath evening, March 3, 1833, ci what I 
could to improve the order and efficiency of the Sab- 
bath-school. I find that my bodily strength is hardly 



REV. JOHN HENRY GARDNER. 



231 



equal to the exertions that are necessary, after hav- 
ing done the ordinary duties of the Sabbath, I trust, 
however, that, by the blessing of God, what I have 
been able to do, and may yet do, will not be in vain." 

The appointed period, however, of all his labours 
was rapidly approaching its close. " The harbingers 
of early death" gave no uncertain sound; and his 
own apprehensions were too well justified by the 
mournful event. At the very moment when he was 
almost overjoyed by the prospect of again recruiting 
his health and spirits by interviews with his beloved 
relatives and friends, and with his dear fathers and 
brethren at their synodical meeting in Glasgow, he 
was seized with a violent complaint, which speedily 
overwhelmed his delicate frame, and brought him to 
his long home. 

In a letter to his brother-in-law, of April 1, 1833, 
he gave notice of his intentions in the following 
terms : — " I have determined to be at the Synod ; 
and as I had the offer of a gratis day, (the second 
Sabbath of April,) and the session being willing to 
provide supply for the third and fourth Sabbaths of 
the month, I intend leaving home this day week, 
taking the steam-boat to Glasgow, proceeding next 
day by coach to Alloa, and in the end of the week to 
Auchtermuchty and Kennoway. I expect thus to 
reach Edinburgh exactly a week after leaving Whit- 
horn. If you have an opportunity, you may mention 
to uncle Donald that I expect, unless something un- 
foreseen occur, to spend the second Sabbath of this 
month at Kennoway." 

But, ah, how fallacious are human hopes ! How 



232 



LIFE AND DIARY OF THE 



often does ee something unforeseen occur !" The joy 
with which the uncle anticipated the pleasure of once 
more seeing and hearing a nephew whom he loved 
as a son, and valued as a Christian whose maturity 
in grace far exceeded his years, was soon turned into 
sorrow. A few days before the arrival of that second 
Sabbath, he received the sad intelligence, first, of a 
new illness that obliged him to relinquish his design, 
and then of his sudden and lamented death. 

We give his own account of the mortal distemper 
in a letter to his sister, which he wrote in bed on the 
morning of Monday the 8th of April, scarcely two 
days before his departure. " I think I told you in 
my last Edinburgh letter that I was complaining a 
little of a slight inflammation about the left ear. It 
increased towards the middle of last week, and still 
more towards the end of it. I have been afflicted 
with excruciating pains in the whole head, accompa- 
nied with a very severe bilious attack. Preaching 
yesterday was out of the question, and so we had no 
sermon. The worst night I have had was Saturday. 
I was nearly insensible the whole night ; a blister 
was applied to my shoulder, but I had no conception 
of what was doing. I was bled near the ear with 
one leech on Friday, (because we could get no more,) 
and on Saturday by three. I trust I am permanently 
better to-day, though I must not be too sanguine. I 
am, as you will easily suppose, very weak. You will 
not be surprised when I tell you that I have given up 
all thought of going to the Synod at this time. When 
Providence may be pleased to allow me to visit my 
friends, I shall not at present attempt to conjecture." 



REV. JOHN HENRY GARDNER. 



233 



This we believe was the last letter he ever wrote.. 
It was speedily followed by a mournful and sympa- 
thizing communication from Mr Robert H. Smith to 
his brother-in-law, from which we quote the following 
extract : — 

" Whithorn, April 10, 1833. 

" My Dear Sir — It is with feelings of the most 
painful nature that I have to communicate to you the 
melancholy tidings of Mr Gardner's death, which took 
place this morning a little before four. He wrote you 
on Monday morning, giving you an account, as I un- 
derstood, of his illness up to that time. He was then 
considerably better, though weak. The pain had quit- 
ted his head, and there was an abatement of sickness. 
He seemed on the whole to be improving up to last 
night about eleven, when matters took a very sudden 
and unexpected turn. He then became insensible, 
and remained in that state till his departure. There 
was nothing like a struggle — c he fell asleep.' 

From the time of his first complaining, my cou- 
sin, Dr Broadfoot, attended him. As soon as the 
disease assumed a more serious appearance, the other 
two medical gentlemen in town Avere called in, and 
nothing was left undone which could be suggested to 
remove or alleviate the complaint. They seem in- 
clined to think that his disease must have been allied 
to hydrocephalus, [dropsy in the head.] 

" We all sincerely sympathize with you in this 
severe trial which it has pleased the Lord to measure 
out to you, and trust that he will apportion the sup- 
ply of his grace to your need. One abundant source 



234 



LIFE AND DIARY OF THE 



of consolation yon have, in the assurance that you 
sorrow not as those that have no hope/' 

On the 9th May, Mrs Smith had the kindness to 
write a letter to his mother, containing a minute 
statement of circumstances attending the last illness 
and death of her son. To this source we are chiefly 
indebted for the following particulars. 

The Sabbath eight days before his decease he occu- 
pied his pulpit as usual. The subject of his last 
lecture was the ministry of John the Baptist, as nar- 
rated in Luke iii. ; for, after expounding the whole 
epistle to the Philippians, he had begun lecturing on 
the gospel by Luke, and proceeded from its com- 
mencement to chapter iii. 19. His last three sermons 
related to the exceeding great and precious promises, 
with their blessed design and effects, 2 Peter i. 4, 5. 
On the evening of the Monday after that Sabbath, he 
presided at the monthly missionary prayer-meeting of 
the congregation. On the Tuesday evening he spent 
several hours at the school-house in examining the 
children, the expense of whose education was defrayed 
by the " Society for Religious Purposes." Part of 
Tuesday and Wednesday he employed in visiting some 
infirm and afflicted persons, whom he wished to con- 
verse and pray with before taking his intended jour- 
ney. Meantime he found the pain in his ear increa- 
sing ; and on Thursday, being incapable of study, he 
endeavoured to entertain himself hy various innocent 
means. After tea, " he sung, among other things, the 
whole of the 23d Psalm. He then said, What shall 
we flee to next ? I suppose Ave must return to the old 



REV. JOHN HENRY GARDNER. 



235 



theme, to talk of absent friends. After that, talked 
seriously of religion j repeated most of the epistle to 
the Epliesians, and some chapters of Romans." Fri- 
day morning he was no better, but came down stairs, 
and remained in the parlour almost the whole day. 
In the evening, after much persuasion, he made up 
his mind to warn the congregation of no sermon on 
Sabbath. Still spoke with pleasure of his journey in 
prospect, but beginning with reluctance to give up 
hopes of setting out on Monday. He said, a How 
foolish is it in us to talk of what we will do to-mor- 
row, when we know not what a day may bring forth, 
We should say, if the Lord will, we will live and do 
this or that." On Saturday morning he came down 
to breakfast, but felt rather worse ; and subsequently, 
as has been stated, his trouble became somewhat 
alarming. On Monday he felt considerably relieved, 
but was compelled by his weakness to give up all 
thoughts of leaving home. When it was proposed 
that evening to write for his mother, he objected to 
this design, on the ground that she had been very 
poorly, and he was afraid she might come, however 
unable, and might suffer from exposure and cold in 
the journey. At his request an excellent nurse, who 
had waited on him for a time during his former ill- 
ness, was now provided, when he thanked God for 
sending her to take care of him in his affliction, pray- 
ed that she might be no loser by her labour of love, 
prayed for his mother and all his relations and 
friends, for Mrs Smith and family, and for the con- 
gregation. Pie often talked with the nurse of the 
death of his sister Magdalene, and all the circumstan- 



236 



LIFE AND DIARY OF THE 



ces of it. A young girl attending his Sabbath school, 
having entered his apartment when stretched on the 
bed of languishing., he fixed his eyes on her, and told 
her to think of that Scripture, cC What is a man pro- 
fited if he shall gain the whole world and lose his own 
soul ? " 

On Tuesday he felt considerably better, found his 
strength somewhat increased, and was considered free 
from every symptom of immediate danger. But let 
us hear, in her own words, Mrs Smith's interesting 
account of the scene which instantly followed, and of 
her intense feelings on that trying occasion : — 

ci After sitting a while, I went to take leave of 
him, as he was beginning to be drowsy. When 
parting I said to him, Jehovah hear thee in the clay 
of trouble. Pressing my hand with peculiar earnest- 
ness, he replied, Oh that it may return upon you 
sevenfold! Some time after, Ritchie (the nurse) 
offered him a drink, which she had been preparing for 
him. He said he would not take it at present, as he 
was disposed to sleep ; that he had been dreaming, 
but it was pleasant. He fell asleep immediately, and 
lay perfectly quiet for about half an hour, (till about 
eleven,) when Ritchie became alarmed by the quick- 
ness and loudness of his breathing, and alteration in 
his appearance. I got up with all possible speed, but 
alas what a change had taken place in so short a 
time ! His eyes were fixed, his breathing laborious, 
his pulse very quick and weak. The doctors were in 
immediate attendance, but they could not stay his 
spirit. Our dear friend was now engaged in that 
warfare from which there is no discharge. He con- 



REV. JOHN HENRY GARDNER. 



237 



tinued in the same way, motionless, with not a feature 
discomposed, till a little before four, when he depart- 
ed without a struggle. But, my dear Mrs Gardner, 
I cannot express what I felt at that moment ; how 
deeply I grieved for you at a distance, bereaved of an 
only son, and such a son too. None but they who 
knew his worth can appreciate the extent of your 
loss. I cannot express how much I sympathize with 
you, with Mrs Simpson, and with all his friends. It 
is indeed a great trial, but it is not unmixed with 
mercy. For you have the consolation of knowing 
that he was not a moment in bondage to the fear of 
death, and never experienced the bitterness of part- 
ing with those he held most dear ; and, above every 
thing, you have the assured hope of his having joined 
the company of the redeemed from among men, and 
of his now enjoying the smiles of his countenance 
whom he loved and served — happiness, with which 
nothing here below can be compared. I trust God 
will send you help from his sanctuary, and comfort 
you against all grief on every side. 

f ' I cannot tell how much I feel the loss of Mi- 
Gardner. "What then must you feel ? A son could 
not have been kinder than he was. He took an in- 
terest in all my little affairs, and sympathized with 
me in all my joys and sorrows. I need hardly say 
that his loss is deeply felt by the congregation, and all 
who had the happiness to know him. Mr Simpson 
would tell you that his grave is close to my husband's. 
My sister, and Robert, and I, visited it a few days 
ago." 



238 



LIFE AND DIARY OP THE 



The funeral, which took place on Tuesday 16th 
April, was honoured by the presence of a number of 
clergymen, a large proportion of his own congregation, 
and Christians of other denominations in that vicinity, 
who respected his character, and deplored his prema- 
ture decease. As in the case of Mr Rowatt, the in- 
habitants testified their regard for his memory by not 
opening their shops till the affecting ceremony was 
over. 

Owing to the local distance and other causes, few 
of his relatives could do themselves the melancholy 
satisfaction to bear a part in the last sad offices due 
to humanity. Two of them, however, were present, 
namely, the same uncle who had accompanied him 
some years before in his trip to Ireland, and his 
brother-in-law. His mother, when the surprising 
and deeply afflicting intelligence of her son's being 
no more reached her, expressed a determination to go 
immediately to Whithorn. She was with difficulty 
persuaded, however, chiefly on account of the state of 
her own health at the time, to remain in Edinburgh, 
and to satisfy herself with the prospect of repairing 
at some future opportunity to see the spot where the 
valued remains of her son rest in peace, and in the 
blessed hope of a glorious resurrection. This pro- 
spect was afterwards realized. It pleased a gracious 
Providence to permit her to accomplish the much 
wished for, though mournful visit, in the autumn of 
the same year, when she experienced an attention 
and sympathy from the esteemed friends in whose 
house her son had resided and expired, and from 



REV. JOHN HENRY GARDNER. 



239 



many other members of the congregation, which she 
can neyer forget. Far less would it become her to 
forget that Divine hand by which both she and her 
daughter were sustained under this sadly bereaving 
visitation. " The unexpected death of my beloved 
brother/' says his sister, in a letter written only seven 
days after the event, " was indeed a severe stroke to 
my dear mother ; and I need not tell you that both 
she and I are deeply afflicted. We have reason, 
however, to bless God that we have been supported 
almost beyond our expectation. Had we known that 
the desolating stroke was impending, we would have 
thought it insupportable ; but God can support while 
he smites, and can bind up the heart which he has 
broken. We mourn, and deeply mourn, but I trust 
we do not murmur. O my dear uncle, it is hard for 
flesh and blood to part with one so justly dear to us ; 
but his Saviour had a better right to him than we 
had, and we dare not repine." 

Previous to the interment, it appears that death 
had not materially altered the appearance of his face. 
* ; If you have ever seen him asleep," says Mr F. in a 
letter written after his arrival at Whithorn, u or 
rather (for his eyes are a little open) making a pause 
in the time of prayer, then you will have some idea 
of the serene and placid expression of his counte- 
nance." 

The body being deposited, as has been mentioned, 
hard by the mortal remains of his predecessor, it was 
deemed proper, alike by the congregation and by Mr 
Smith's family, that an inscription relative to Mr 
Gardner should be engraven on the same elegant 



240 



LIFE AND DIARY OF THE 



monument erected to commemorate the worth of that 
excellent man. It is as follows : — 

THE REV. JOHN H. GARDNER, 
SUCCESSOR TO THE REY. MR SMITH, 
A YOUNG MAN OF GREAT PIETY, AMIABLENESS, 

AND TALENT, 
AFTER GIVING HIGH PROMISE OF USEFULNESS, 
DIED, AFTER A SHORT ILLNESS, ON 
THE 10TH APRIL 1833, 
IN THE 26TH YEAR OF HIS AGE, AND THE 
2ND OF HIS MINISTRY. 

The Sabbath after the interment, the Rev. William 
Smellie of Stranraer, having kindly undertaken to 
officiate at Whithorn, addressed the congregation in 
discourses calculated to console their minds under the 
painful stroke which bereaved them of a young pastor 
equally loving and beloved, and to excite them to the 
right improvement of this instructive and trying visi- 
tation. 

The announcement of Mr Gardner s sudden death 
w r as received with sincere regret by a wide circle of 
friends and acquaintance both among the clergy and 
laity. One sentiment of deep sympathy for his con- 
gregation and his relatives, especially his bereaved 
mother, appeared to pervade the bosoms of many ; of 
whom a number gave utterance to their feelings by 
means of personal calls or epistolary communication. 
From the numerous letters received on this mourn- 
ful occasion, we shall present to the reader the few 
following extracts, which breathe alike a high esteem 
for the deceased, and unfeigned commiseration for 
the bereaved. 



REV. JOHN HENRY GARDNER. 



241 



The first place seems due to the late Rev. John Ro- 
bertson, at that time the father, as well as the clerk 
of the Presbytery of Wigton, who, in a letter dated 
Stranraer, 15th April 1833, addressed to Mr Robert 
H. Smith, with instructions to show it to his rela- 
tives, states his views of the loss sustained, in the fol- 
lowing terms : — 

" His death will be felt as a heavy bereavement 
to the congregation, at a time, when, notwithstand- 
ing his delicate health, he gave such promise of being 
a most useful minister. It will be felt as a loss to 
the Presbytery, of which he was an active and con- 
scientious, and likely to become an efficient member. 
I sincerely sympathize with his widowed mother, 
who will have to mourn the loss of an only son, who 
was every thing the fondest parent could wish— and 
with his numerous relatives, to whom he was de- 
servedly dear. But the recollection of that excellence 
which chiefly adorned his character, will afford the 
most soothing reflection to surviving mourners — his 
deep-felt and habitual sense of religion. 

ie For myself, I regret his loss most sincerely. I 
felt an interest in him beforehand for his father's 
sake and the more I knew of himself, my affection 
and esteem for him increased on his own account. 
The announcement of his death produced a great 
sensation here, especially in my congregation, who 
had always a warm regard for him. But the Lord 
had other designs, and it becomes us to bow with re- 
verence to his will, and take it in the mean time as a 
solemn admonition to us to be also ready." 

The Rev. Dr Taylor of Auchtermuchty, to whom 



242 



LIFE AND DIARY OF THE 



he stood indebted for many acts of cordial friend- 
ship during his lifetime, addressed a very kind and 
consolatory letter to his mother, shortly after his 
death, part of which is as follows : — 

" It would assuredly he very unnatural for you, my 
dear Madam, not to he deeply afflicted. At the same 
time, I surely need not, in such a case, and writing 
to such a person, advert to the Apostle's injunction, 
not to soitow as those that have no hope. Our reli- 
gion is one by which boasting is excluded, but one 
which calls on us also to acknowledge what Divine 
grace has done in the persons of our brethren ; and 
I believe all who knew our deceased friend, have a 
strong persuasion that he was not only a real, but an 
eminent Christian. If so, we are sure from Scrip- 
ture, that it must have been not only gain for him 
to die, but gain so unspeakably great that you could 
not for a moment wish to withhold him from it, for the 
sake of any advantages you might have derived from 
his being continued here. This, I think, is a sound 
and strong argument for acquiescing in this dispen- 
sation, in addition to the paramount duty of submit- 
ting unreservedly to the will of the Lord. 

" He was doubtless exceedingly anxious to spend 
a life of usefulness in the service of his Redeemer. 
But I think we have good reason to hope that he 
may be engaged at present in a far higher depart- 
ment of Christian operation, in unspeakably more 
agreeable and advantageous circumstances, and with 
vastly greater success. 

" For yourself, you have not only this promise, that 
God will supply all your need • but I hope you will 



REV. JOHN HENRY GARDNER. 



243 



permit me to remind you, that Jesus, in the clays of 
his flesh, especially manifested his compassion on 
occasion of the death of the only son of a Avidow. It 
is nothing to say that miracles are not now to be 
looked for ; Christ is always perfomihig miracles of 
mercy to his people. Be careful for nothing, but in 
every thing by prayer and supplication, with thanks- 
giving, let your requests be made known unto God : 
and the peace of God, which passeth all understand- 
ing, shall keep your heart and mind through Christ 
Jesus." 

To these two extracts, we shall only add a short 
notice of him, contained in a letter addressed by his 
esteemed fellow-student, the Rev. Charles Johnston, 
to the Rev. John Tindal of Rathillet, bearing date 
Monkwearmouth, April 15th, 1833. 

<f I received a note this day from Edinburgh, an- 
nouncing the death of the Rev. John Henry Gard- 
ner, Whithorn. He died on Wednesday last at four 
o'clock morning. He was licensed along with me to 
preach the gospel, and he was my intimate friend. 
We wrote to one another every three months. I re- 
ceived a letter from him last week, written by his 
own hand, within less than eight days of his death. 
I shall give you a sentence or two from his letter : — 
In reference to his former affliction he says, ' I fear 
the impression soon wore entirely off, and now I 
have perhaps more need than ever of being sent 
through the furnace. I trust my present ailments 
will not prevent me from attending the Synod, but 
it is possible I may be disappointed. We depend too 
much for happiness upon human friends.' — ' Thurs- 



244 



LIFE AND DIARY OF THE 



day evening,' he says, ( My complaint is a great deal 
worse to-day ; but why should a living man com- 
plain ? ' — " I believe," adds Mr Johnston, ' ' that Mi- 
Gardner was a sincere and devoted Christian, and 
I trust that he has exchanged the labours and trou- 
bles of life for a heavenly crown," 

Having put the reader in possession of these testi- 
monies to his worth, as well as detailed the leading 
particulars of his whole life, it seems now unnecessary 
for us to exhibit any lengthened delineation of his 
character. Let a few words suffice. — To excellent 
natural talents he added a considerable share of lite- 
rary and theological acquirements. His temper con- 
stitutionally amiable, notwithstanding a sensitiveness 
that required the exercise of vigilance, became, from 
the influence of grace, still more lovely. By the Di- 
vine blessing on pastoral instruction and'parental care, 
he early saw the importance, and felt the power of 
scriptural and evangelical truth. Knowing his obli- 
gations to Him who bought him with his blood, and 
called him out of darkness into marvellous light, his 
whole soul was devoted to the cause of the Redeemer. 
In his endeavours to promote the immortal interests 
of all, and in particular of the young, he displayed an 
ardent and indefatigable, yet prudent zeal. In the 
important stations he was called successively to fill as 
a teacher, a probationer, and a pastor, he acquitted 
himself with conscientious fidelity. The pursuits 
of literature, however dear, were not permitted to 
displace, nor were the public offices of religion, how- 
ever interesting, allowed to supersede the devo- 
tions and self-inquiries of the closet. Though re- 



REV. JOHN HENRY GARDNER. 



245 



garcled by his acquaintance as a most blameless and 
exemplary person, he strictly scrutinized and deeply 
lamented his own sins and defects, inwardly aspiring- 
after that glorious perfection which every Christian 
shall at last attain. He exemplified, in short, in no 
ordinary degree, those blessed fruits of the Spirit, in- 
tegrity, humility, candour, and charity. 

If any trait of his character remains to be more 
fully developed, it is the fervent and sanctified attach- 
ment he bore for all those to whom he stood related 
by tender ties. This, however, is a sacred inclosure. 
on which it is scarcely allowable to enter ; yet we can 
hardly refrain from treading for a moment this deli- 
cate ground. No son or brother could well surpass 
him in filial or fraternal affection. Attached beyond 
measure to the abode of a parent, he could not enter 
it without lively emotions of pleasure, nor leave it 
without feelings of regret. In October 1825, he says, 

Cold as have been my religious affections for a con- 
siderable time past, I could not but feel grateful to 
that kind Providence which had allowed me once 
more to enter in peace the dear dwelling of my mo- 
ther and sister." — ei Immediately after dinner," he 
says a few days after, f I left with more regret than 
I could have anticipated, the sweet society of my 
loving and beloved parent, whom may God shield in 
his everlasting arms. Mary accompanied me for a 
mile and a half." That maternal kindness with which 
he was uniformly treated, he amply repaid by the 
warmest gratitude. With him, the law of a mother 
wag second in authority to the law of God. He stood 
prepared to obey her counsels and anticipate her 



246 



LIFE AND DIARY OF THE 



wishes. If in any instance his conscience accused 
him of slighting her injunctions, or grieving her spi- 
rit, he speedily discovered a heartfelt compunction. 
Actuated alike by a principle of integrity and the 
power of affection, he gave substantial evidence of a 
readiness to indemnify her for the expense of the 
liberal education she cheerfully gave him. On all 
occasions he rejoiced to contribute to her happiness ; 
and in particular, after Divine truth had entered 
deeply into his heart, he was solicitous to administer 
heavenly consolations to her soul, amid vexing cares 
or painful recollections. Influenced by this pious so- 
licitude, he tenderly alluded to the death of her hus- 
band and his father, in a letter dated January 28, 
1826. " Last Sabbath," says he, a would recall 
mournful thoughts to your recollection. how sweet 
to have an undying friend, into whose bosom we need 
never hesitate to pour our sorrows." 

His affection for his sisters was characterised by 
similar tenderness and piety. Writing to his mother, 
u Glasgow, August 5, 1829/' he says, " My dear 
mother, it is just eight years since your house be- 
came a house of mourning, on account of our dear 
Magdalene's death. May the more vivid recollection 
of her, which the return of the melancholy season is 
calculated to bring with it, have the effect of teaching 
us more impressively than ever the insufficiency of a 
world where every thing passeth away, and what we 
most love is often most fragile. But we are Christians, 
I trust ; and if so, the thought of our own passing 
away ought to be a thought of joy — a blessed hope ; 
for it is the thought of leaving all that is weak, and 



REV. JOHN HENRY GARDNER. 



247 



variable, and painful, and mingling with all that is 
stable, and excellent, and happy." 

In a subsequent letter, to another correspondent, 
dated Whithorn, 22d October 1832, after alluding to 
Magdalene's descending to an early grave, he thus 
continues — " She was a most sweet and amiable girl . 
I trust the Saviour had marked her as one of the 
lambs of his flock, and only removed her then to his 
better fold above. It is eleven years and more since 
I laid her cold dust in its kindred earth ; but the 
thoughts of her make me at this moment shed tears 
as abundant as those which fell upon her grave while 
it was yet fresh. They are (partly at least) tears of 
bitter regret that I did not love her better, and imi- 
tate her more, while she was with us. Oh ! E , 

let us cleave to the lively hope which is through the 
resurrection of Jesus Christ from the dead." 

To his surviving sister, he addressed a great num - 
ber of affectionate letters, often highly entertaining, 
but generally replete with animating views and salu- 
tary counsel relative to her highest interest. Let one 
example serve instead of many that might be pro- 
duced : — . 

" Letham, January 5, 1 829. 
ec My dear Mary, — Let our endeavour be to live 
as seeing Him who is invisible. Let us strive to 
realize that there is such a great all-seeing, all- 
powerful, and all-merciful being as the God of the 
Scriptures, the God and Father of our Lord Jesus 
Christ. Let us frequently think how near the rela- 
tion is in which we stand to him. We are his off- 
spring, and he is our Father ; and (to use the words 



248 



LIFE AND DIARY OF THE 



of Mr Thomas Erskine) ' what a possibility of good 
or evil, without end, is treasured up in that relation ! ' 
But let us do more than this : we must not be satis- 
fied with possibility ; we must ' lay hold on eternal 
life/ and put the eternally momentous point beyond 
all question, whether we shall live for ever, or die 
the second death. Eternal life is in his favour, and 
his favour is brought near us. ' It is in our mouth, 
and in our heart.' It is pressing itself on us, and will 
hardly allow us to exclude it. The favour of God, 
and of course ' all things are ours,' if we willingly 
repose our souls on the fact, that God manifest in 
flesh died for our offences, and rose again for our 
justification. O were God and his favour felt in their 
reality by our minds, I am sure our minds would 
willingly empty themselves of all trifling and tran- 
sient joys, to make room for a happiness too vast to 
be fully grasped, even by a heart unfilled and un- 
chained by the things and affections of the world." 

We shall only farther allude to the kindness 
and respect which, from the date of his arrival in 
Scotland in his infancy, he uniformly showed to 
an aunt with whom he then got acquainted, and 
who, after her father's death, became an inmate of 
his mother's house. To introduce her own testimony 

regarding him — " John Henry," says I F— — . 

in a letter to one of her brothers very soon after his 
death, H had particularly endeared himself to me, not 
only by the sweetness of his disposition, Christian 
cheerfulness, kindness, and personal attentions from 
his very infancy, but also by his strictly conscientious 
regard to principle in every part of his conduct since 



REV. JOHN HENRY GARDNER. 



249 



ever I knew him, and also by his zeal in the canse of 
his Redeemer since he grew up, and the deep interest 
he felt in the spiritual welfare of all around him, 
especially the young. He was ripe for heaven, and 
it seems the Lord had no more work for him on the 
earth." 

It is not without cause that in this extract his 
aunt makes mention of his " Christian cheerfulness." 
Though deeply serious in spirit, and conscientious in 
deportment, he was by no means gloomy or morose. 
His temper was characterised by a good deal of 
native humour and playfulness ; and this vivacity, 
chastened and improved by principle, rendered his 
company no less pleasant than it was instructive. 

In stature, he was a little above the middle size, 
and the expression of his countenance corresponded 
with the sweetness of his disposition, the simplicity 
of his character, and the devotional feelings that were 
cherished in his breast. The portrait, fronting the 
title-page of this volume, is taken from a painting in 
miniature, executed in 1828, and considered a very 
good likeness. Many who knew his grandfather, the 
Rev. John Fraser, were very much struck with the 
close resemblance he bore in his features and general 
aspect to that honoured relative. 

Waiving all minute inquiries regarding the designs 
of Providence in assigning so very short a career to 
a young minister so hopeful and interesting, we shall 
only remark in general, that jt becomes us to adore 
the sovereignty, the rectitude, and the boundless wis- 
dom of that God, u who worketh all things after the 
counsel of his own will." This, as we have seen, is 



250 



LIFE AND DIARY OF THE 



far from being a solitary example of the power of 
death under similar circumstances. Within these ten 
years past, the United Secession Church has been 
called to lament the premature departure of a consi- 
derable number of young ministers, distinguished at 
once for piety and talent ; and in the memoirs of 
some of them that have been given to the world, the 
reader may find judicious and useful observations 
respecting the salutary purposes which the early ex- 
tinction, or rather translation, of these burning and 
shining lights is calculated to serve. 

Amidst these affecting bereavements, it is a never- 
failing source of consolation to the Church, that her 
Great Head is alive for evermore, and will never 
prove wanting to his own cause. " A seed shall 
serve him f and whatever may have been the gifts 
and graces of those whose departure we regret, or what- 
ever the prospects of their future usefulness in this 
world which are now finally cut off, he is able to 
provide other pastors after his own heart to succeed 
them, endowed with equal or superior qualifications 
for building up the Church. 

The United Associate Congregation of Whithorn, 
after a vacancy which lasted one month longer than 
the whole period of Mr Gardner's ministry, were 
blessed with another pastor, namely, the Rev. James 
Gibson, who was ordained February 11, 1835. May 
this young man be enabled to copy whatever was 
most worthy of imitation in the character and con- 
duct of his predecessors, and be spared many years 
for an eminent blessing to that people ! 

As to Mr Gardner's writings, we may say that 



REV. JOHN HENRY GARDNER. 



251 



he published no one acknowledged production, and 
very little in any shape. We know that he com- 
posed the Fifth Annual Report of the Highland 
Missionary Society, (for 1826,) and the short no- 
tice of the Rev. Mr Rowatt, formerly mentioned ; 
but we are aware of only one published Essay 
that was the fruit of his pen, being the first article 
in the United Secession Magazine for February 
1833, pp. 65-71, subscribed G. W. G. It is en- 
titled, " Remarks on certain Quotations from the 
Old Testament, occurring in the 2d chapter of 
the Epistle to the Hebrews/' Though . probably 
too minutely critical for a popular miscellany, it 
discovers capacity and acuteness, and it closes 
with a pious wish, worthy of a student of Scrip- 
ture whose best hopes and joys related to eter- 
nity. a We hold interpretation," says he, " to be 
the handmaid of rational and enlightened devotion ; 
and therefore, though our space will not admit of a 
lengthened improvement, we cannot close these (per- 
haps tedious) remarks, without at least expressing 
our fervent wish that we ourselves, and our readers, 
may practically experience that relationship to the 
Redeemer, and that communion with him, (its un- 
varying and blessed accompaniment,) which will 
prove to us our best solace against the griefs with 
which we are acquainted on earth ; our best defence 
in the hour of contest with the last enemy ; our best, 
our unutterable joy, while eternity endures." 

The numerous extracts from his correspondence 
and Diary, which form the substance of this little 
work, are a kind of Posthumous writings. u By these," 



252 



LIFE AND DIARY, &C. 



and by the example they exhibit, " he being dead yet 
speaketh." Miscellaneous and detached though they 
be, they discover, it is hoped, a good understanding 
and a feeling heart. Some of them relate to topics 
of the highest moment ; and it is not impossible for 
that God, who often accomplishes great effects by the 
feeblest means, to crown them by his blessing with a 
larger portion of success in promoting the spiritual 
welfare of the reader, than in many instances he allots 
to regular and elaborate performances, invested with 
all the attractions that genius, industry, and art can 
bestow. ci Of him, and through him, and to him, 
are all things; to whom be glory for ever. 
Amen." 



THE END. 



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